Custody visit
BM emailed my DH today to let him know she had a small house fire and that she had been put in a hotel temporarly by the Red Cross. She is due to get DSS Christmas eve at noon until Christmas day at noon. In the article it says that three adults and a child were displaced by the fire. When she recently filed custody papers(she wants custody of DSS) she claimed that only she, her BF and her older son live in the house. So who is the other person?
In the email she stated that she WAS still picking up DSS for her visit despite the fact that they are all crammed into a small hotel room. In the current custody papers is states that each parent much maintain appropriate sleeping aggangments for DSS at all times.
DH feels that staying in the hotel is NOT appropriate and wants to cancel the visit because he fears for DSS safety.
Can we do that? Cancel the visit?
Our court date is January 10th.
I'm afraid it will look bad for us in court eventho DH is just looking out for his son's best interest.
I must add that DSS came home from the last visit reaking like wood stove and I don't mean a little I mean SATURATED with it. It's been 7 days and we still can't get the smell out of his hair. I'm sure that's what caused the fire. The online article says there was minor damage.
Should we cancel the visit and just deal with the backlash?
Let me start off by saying,
Let me start off by saying, as someone who is referenced quite a bit in the papers due to my job, they get a LOT wrong. I would not assume that there was actually an additional person just because the paper reported it. Seriously, reporters everywhere suck at fact verification.
Second, how is SS being in a hotel a safety concern? Would your DH refuse to allow BM to take SS on a vacation because he's concerned about safety or sleeping arrangements?
I think it would make him
I think it would make him look bad. I know it sucks, but I think since its only a 24 hour period and not an extended visit, maybe your dh should let him go. Unless of course there are drugs present and your DH REALLY fears for his safety.
Agree with everyone else. HE
Agree with everyone else. HE would be in the wrong ad in contempt. I mean she isn't living in a hotel by choice. All she would have to do is show a judge her Red Cross vouchers or paperwork, articles, etc and the judge would understand. And it IS only for ONE whole day. ONE night of sleeping in a hotel. Besides, dh would have to prove that the sleeping arrangements were 'unacceptable' and howcan he prove that if he's not there?
I don't think a judge would
I don't think a judge would consider a hotel an inappropriate sleeping space, especially under her current circumstances. Considering the fact that her house caught fire just before Xmas I would assume this would garner her sympathy and understanding as it is a family tragedy situation. Also hotel placement after fire is standard protocol. Add to the fact that it is Christmas and of course she wants to spend it with her child. I'm pretty confident you would look heartless and unwilling to compromise if you withheld the visitation...especially if you are going for a custody case soon. Let skid go spend a mere 24 hours for Christmas with his mom. They deserve to see each other on Christmas.
In regards to the wood stove smell....I was raised in the U.P of Michigan and many family's there heat there homes in this way. I had a friend who always smelled of the strong scent as well. It is certainly not anything that a judge would hold against the BM.