So I post a lot on here about BM and SS, but I have never mentioned my MIL. DH has two half brothers and I have heard from both BILs that MIL was a HCBM 100% when it came to coparenting with their Dad. Well MIL met and married FIL and told FIL that she didn't want anymore kids. Well FIL wanted kids so they had DH. MIL told FIL that DH was his responsibility and basically, since she didn't want him, he's not her problem to deal with. MIL and FIL divorced almost 10 years ago. FIL and DH are very close. MIL has always preferred BILs. BILs always give DH crap about his poor relationship with MIL, blaming him for not trying hard enough to be a part of the family, even though MIL puts in no effort to have a relationship with DH. 

MIL hates me and my SIL (BIL's wife). She believes we are the women who took her babies away, which is ironic given she has contacted DH maybe 20 times during our entire 9 year relationship. She is the type of person who doesn't call all year and then demands your presence at major holidays, like Christmas. MIL has not helped DH with anything ever and only calls if she needs something. My family has always looked out for DH and helped him, both financially and emotionally. He is really close to my family. MIL and I got in a fight last year where she accused my family of "buying DH's love" and she ripped into me, basically calling me a spoiled brat. I didn't stand for this. I calmly but firmly informed her that I have been the one that has stood by DH's side through two lay offs, several court battles, every visitation, all of BM's PAS, etc. while she has barely acknowledged his existence for 9 years. I informed her that I would not tolerate her tone and this conversation was over. She texted me later "to apologize" saying that clearly DH "made his choice" between MIL and me.

So, we see SS 6 weeks per year on a long distance schedule. Every time SS visits, we text MIL and let her know when SS will be in town and every time, she promises to make plans and then cancels. DH and I don't care and honestly, SS doesn't know her, so it's probably for the best. But, every time SS comes and goes, MIL posts on FB about how she never gets to see SS. DH and I always get crap for this. 

A month ago, MIL texts DH about seeing SS, but informs DH that she is going to California for a 5 day vacation, so the visit will have to be after the fact. No problem. Well, a few days later, BIL (who lives in Arizona), tells DH that they are also vacationing in California. Coincidence, I don't think so. Sure enough, MIL went to California for 5 days with BIL, but the whole family kept it on the down low to avoid upsetting DH, since MIL refuses to visit us. 

So MIL calls DH last night and asks when she can see SS. She informs DH that she didn't plan accordingly with PTO and that she will need DH to either meet her halfway in a drive thru somewhere or DH will need to come to her so she can see SS. Her logic: we live too far away... We live 2 hours via car from MIL, who traveled across country two weeks ago to see BIL. DH informed her that we only have a week of visitation left and that DH already had his PTO days with SS, which MIL knew about a month ago, when DH originally contacted her to try to make plans. MIL got angry and that was that. DH put the blame back on MIL and told her "better luck next time." 

This is the same MIL who told SS9 that she couldn't come to SS' birthday party at our house because she wasn't fully vaccinated, but was going on vacations and eating out at restaurants every night. She then posted a "Happy Birthday" message all over FB, with a super old picture of her and SS, saying how sad she was that she couldn't be with him on his special day. I told DH that when we have our baby, I am not going out of my way for MIL to be a part of our lives. She is going to have to put in some effort. DH 100% agreed.