SD18 have moved out
It's official she is out of the house. I came home to her room being mostly emptied. If the remainder of her stuff doesn't get moved by the end of the week it's going to Goodwill. SD didn't tell BM she was moving out. They talked about it but she never told her for certain she was moving out and when. BM came home to her house to find SD's room emptied. BM had a fit and told SD that she's canceling her car insurance and cell phone. If she wants to be an adult and out on her own she needs to learn responsibility. SD is having a fit. She is telling DH if BM wants to still have a daughter she better not do this. If she does do this SD claims she will never speak to BM again. And this BM and DH is the entitled brat you have raised.
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So eager to move out of her
So eager to move out of her parents' house(es)...yet still doesn't want to adult.
I hope your DH has a spine, otherwise you guys will end up being the ones covering SD's insurance/phone.
NOPE....she's tried that
NOPE....she's tried that avenue already. She was on our insurance and driving our vehicle until she was caught smoking pot while driving and drinking and driving. Not mature/responsible enough to drive any of my vehicles. We took her off our insurance and took the car away from her for a reason. Plus we can't insure a vehicle we don't own. As for the phone we are on our on a family plan with my parents and we don't have unlimited data. I'm not adding her to my plan to cost all of us extra and to have her run up our data usage.
Just like a whiny child who
Just like a whiny child who threatens to run away or call the cops for "abuse", you call their bluff.
"If that's how you feel, fine, but I'm still cancelling everything. Good luck!"
When she's Week 6 into eating ramen and doesn't know how she will pay her bills, she'll come back grovelling. Let her get grovel and feel the full extent of eviction. She'll either change or be cemented into being a victim. Either way, best to know now.
I'm hoping this lasts and she
I'm hoping this lasts and she doesn't come back. I'm already transforming her room and using her closet:)
I went to college. Left on
I went to college. Left on good terms with my parents. Didn't ask for anything as they made it clear what expectations they had of me. I was welcome to stay during breaks and summers.
I was gone ONE WEEKEND and my room was converted to a guest room. They wasted zero time telling me exactly where I stood in the household.
I say buy yourself a few pieces of gym equipment just to make it way less comfy of a guest space.
Welcome to adulting SD. You
Welcome to adulting SD.
You dont get to make demands and threaten other adults because you are unhappy.
She wanted to play grown up. Oblige her.
bm kicked the skids out one
bm kicked the skids out one by one as they each turned 18. the father that the ignored, mistreated and bad mouthed took them in. we had a full house to say the least. we did not allow drunken parties but the skids would come home at all hours of the night loud and drunk and banging things around. it woke us up from a deep sleep. the worse thing was one of the skids brought a drunk friend into the house and she vomited all over the house.
bm gave not a penny to any of them after she kicked them out. the graduation gift to each skid was block party for the neighbors to eat and get drunk at the family expense. nice parting gift for the children and a special message as well. get out of the house.
one of the skid had the nerve to tell me to my face to go to h%ll after being told repeatedly to help with the house work. at that point i told her to leave. to my surprise dh actually had my back to this.
dh continued to pay for her phone and car insurance (we provided her with a car) until she had too many accidents and racked up a $600 phone bill for usage over her maximum.
now all the skid are gone i am happy to say but they still call and text him constantly through the day. the better to keep contact in case they need to ask for money. they are all spoiled brats.
The SECOND I had a car I had
The SECOND I had a car I had to start paying my own insurance... (I also had to pay for my own car and gas...) I don't get why kids seem to think it's a right!
We gave SD a car and our
We gave SD a car and our agreement was she had to pay for the insurance. She had an account that linked to ours (I had access to her account she didn't have access to mine). Every month I went in and transferred her car insurance from her account to ours. When we took the car away and took her off our insurance BM gave her a car and added her to her policy. BM started paying for it, which fine if that's what you want to do but it's not our responsibility. A few weeks ago BM sends DH a text telling him he owes her 1/2 of the insurance for the last year because she has been paying for it. DH told her absolutely not, when she got her license it was agreed she had to pay her own insurance just b/c you decided to pay for it, don't come to us to collect for a years worth of insurance. Of course I got the blame, that I must be the one that will not allow him to support his children. She complained to SD that "now that dad has a new family he won't help out his other children"
Gotta love it when they do
Gotta love it when they do that s*** because they don't get their way... So they have to blame everyone else...
Yep, SS thought he could take
Yep, SS thought he could take the phone and truck we bought him and move in with a friend. You want to act like an adult, we will treat you like one. Repoed that crap.
DH is so cheap he wouldn't even give OSD $20 for her flight home. Even I am not that cheap! She said she had $3 in her account. You can't buy anything for $3 in an airport!
SD came over for her birthday
SD came over for her birthday dinner. I asked her to run to the store to pick up something. Her response is who's car can I take b/c I can't afford to go get gas in my car and I'm on empty. DH reached in his pocket and pulled out a $20. I said I thought we talked about this. If she choose to move out we're not footing her bill. He said "it's her bday" Yes it is her bday and she also has like $200 in gas cards now.
stb 18 SD is currently in
stb 18 SD is currently in psych ward but says she intends to get her own place when released (cause SO told her she cannot live with us and she doesn't want to go back to BM's house). She intends to live off the system like her BM. She has no idea what it takes to adult. I make more money than SO and he rarely asks me for any but I'll be making sure he knows not one cent of my money is to go to SD when she realizes she can't make it on her own. I predict she'll find some idiot to shack up with and get pregnant. Not...my...problem
Good thing I control the
Good thing I control the finances in the house. So if he starts paying for her shit I'll know!
I am on BM's side with this
I am on BM's side with this lol, if you move out and think you are an adult, fine, not going to stop you but also will not support you financially, you made the decision now you live with the consequences...
You just have to make sure DH tells her the same, or better yet say to SD - this is between you and your Mother I want nothing to do with it, and when she asks him for money he can say, Sorry kid you decided to be an adult, now live with that decision, adults do not sponge of their parents.,.
amd make it clear, she will not be moving back after a month, maybe after 6 only
Oh I completely agree with BM
Oh I completely agree with BM as well. She needs responsibilities. DH and BM have raised an entitled brat that thinks she can spend her money on beer, cigarettes, drugs, clothes etc and everyone else should pay what should be a priority like insurance, cell phone and gas.
Haha! She moved out, without
Haha! She moved out, without a word, but expects BM to continue to pay her bills?
This crap just cracks me up.
Entitlement at it's finest.
Entitlement at it's finest. Lack of parenting on both DH & BM's part.
Why in the world would BM
Why in the world would BM care whether she moves out or not? She's 18? Why is she trying to blackmail her own daughter by cancelling her insurance and phone? I get that BM might be perturbed that SD didn't tell her she was moving out but they did discuss it prior so it's not like it was a complete shock?
I don't think of it as
I don't think of it as blackmail I think of it as responsibility. You want to be an adult, you pay the bills like an adult.