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Was anyone here pased as a kid

Anon2009's picture

We all talk about pased skids here, but did anyone here go through pas as a kid?

I did...ironically, it was my stepmother attempting to pas me from my own mom. But I never gave what she said much weight because I knew the truth.

If you were pased, what did you do differently than the pased skids written about here? Was your behavior different?

Comments

DaizyDuke's picture

My mom and dad must have been the exception. My parents divorced when I was about 2 year old. I found out much later (in my late 20's) and only because I flat out asked my mother, that they divorced because my dad cheated on her and knocked up another woman. My Aunt also told me (in my late 20's) that my mom about went off the deep end (ended up depressed and in the BSU for a few days) I never knew any of this growing up. I honestly NEVER heard my mother say a bad word about my dad and vice versa. If I asked my mom for something and the answer was no because we couldn't afford it, that was the end of it. She NEVER directed me to ask my father for anything and I never did. He ended up moving to the other side of the cuntry when I was about 6 and he would send Christmas and Birthday gifts and I would talk to him a couple times a year and that was it. I saw him twice from the time I was 6 until the time I was 18. It didn't scar me for life, it wasn't a reason for my mother to bash him, it was just "life" I guess.

MamaDuck's picture

My parents were a bitter after their divorce, my Dad gets worse as the years go on. I was in my early 20's when they divorced, they both told me crap about the other, infidelities etc I just rolled my eyes and said "well, lucky ya'll got divorced eh?!"...

My younger siblings were only 5 and 7 when our Dad moved out... I had already moved out, so I'm not too sure what they had to endure, but neither one of them want anything to do with Dad right now. Without a doubt, that's partly because of Dad's behaviour towards them, but I suspect also due to (maybe) being PAS'ed against dad by my mother who was hurt at the time.

I think she has tried to repair things over the last couple of years, but the damage is pretty extensive, my siblings do not want anything to do with our Dad, they came back to our country last year for a holiday with me, I arranged to take them to our Dads for dinner, they ditched me before the evening, went out with old friends, didn't come back till the next day, all to avoid our dad Sad

luchay's picture

Yes, me too.

My father had an affair and left my mother when I was 15.

My mother, in her wisdom, told my sister and I all about what happened, how long it had gone on for, and all the usual crap - dad doesn't love "us" anymore, he has a new family now, he won't be visiting us anymore, and basically made it damn near impossible for us to see our dad for about 6 months after they split - I understand her anger. But she shouldn't have involved us.

I have never said a bad word about either of my ex husbands to my dd's. My first ex was abusive in every way to me. But he was a reasonable dad. He was pretty laid back about staying in touch with them or paying CS but I never said a word. And now they are both adults and they KNOW without me ever saying anything what as AH he is.

misSTEP's picture

Although my parents never divorced and are still married to this day, now that I know more about PAS (thanks for that, BM!), I realize that my mom was doing this to me against my dad my entire childhood.

GhostWhoCooksDinner's picture

My parents divorced when I was 8 years old.

I never heard either of them talk badly about the other.

My mother encouraged my relationship with my stepmom.

After going through the PAS that DH and I have gone through with SS9, I thank my parents more than I can possibly say. I feel so bad for SS9. I still don't like him, but I feel bad for him.