FDH is everybody's cash cow
So, BM was *supposed*to be handling getting the skids signed up for day camp for the summer. She lied to FDH and said it was all done and set in stone weeks before school ended for the summer. We found out the Friday afternoon before the week it should have started that in fact, she had not gotten them registered because “they were full.”
I found out yesterday that she never gave FDH back his half of the camp deposit, and I am fuming. FUMING! He says that when he asked for it back, she told him that she needed it to live off of because she was between jobs. How is that his fucking problem? I’m pretty sure she didn’t even TRY to register them and just pocketed that money.
She pays no CS
He has the skids full time during the school year, 50/50 during the summer
He buys everything for the boys – clothes, shoes, extras, EVERYTHING!
She has no debt because he took it all in the divorce
She gets A LOT of money in food stamps
WTF? Is FDH supposed to be her cash cow for life because he was dumb enough to knock her up twice? She contributes ZERO financially to anything in the skids’ lives; everyone seems to think that since I moved in and actually work he has all this money to blow. Umm, no. My money is MINE – I won’t hurt my financial future to support kids I didn’t make. FSIL – who is good friends with BM – tried to extort extra money out of FDH to watch the skids this summer because her SSI got cut and she isn’t getting as much in cs from her kid’s dad. Again, how is that FDH’s problem? Now the skids will be unsupervised on our weeks because FDH won’t allow his sister to take advantage of him. Yet, BM gets away with it.
Normally he is very good about not taking BM’s shit and whatnot, but he seems willing to let this go and it is infuriating!!! He asked me, “What do you want me to do? Scream and yell at her?”
No, muthafucka, tell her you need that money back. I don’t care HOW you say it.
Or maybe I just need to let it go.
ETA: This camp debacle happened over a month ago. Plenty of time to start the new job, get a couple of paychecks, and pay back what she owes.
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Comments
She makes hardly any money,
She makes hardly any money, and he doesn't think it'd be worth it for the ill will it would create. I disagree, strongly.
These chicks infuriate me. She's actually said "Ask dad and queen to buy that for you - they both work so they have money." Biotch, I have money because I waited to have kids (still have none, and probably won't now) till I was financially stable. Oh, and I educated myself and have made smart-ish financial decisions. I work very hard and am certainly not wealthy. I'm just not an idiot.
So, he'd rather get YOUR ill
So, he'd rather get YOUR ill will than hers? That would be a deal-breaker for me. NO OTHER WOMAN IS GOING TO COME BEFORE ME IN MY HUSBAND'S EYES.
That's why this is pissing me
That's why this is pissing me off so much.... really, the camp $$ is a trivial amount of money that we don't NEED. However, she never has to make any sacrifices to care for these kids, and now FDH is enabling her stupidity, which he's never done before. The CS question WILL be revisited. I am sick of deciding not to buy myself a pair of shoes and save that money, because FDH can't really contribute to saving right now carrying the whole financial burden of the skids.
I packed my bags and told DH
I packed my bags and told DH I was leaving if he didn't file for child support. There was no damn way I was going to continue to be taken advantage of.
He did file.
Now that is annoying as hell!
Now that is annoying as hell! I feel for you.
oh dear Lord, I'd have
oh dear Lord, I'd have flipped my shit! and if your BM is anything like mine (and they all seem to be the same) once that money is spent, you'll never see it again. I guess I can see your FDHs point in letting it go, he knows he'll never see a cent, no matter how much jumping up and down, swearing etc he does.
SD15 lives with us and same bull shit... BM never pays a dime, and never will. DH won't pursue it because she'll never have a job and has been living in her mother's trailer with her 3 other kids (not DHs) and 4 other adults since she got evicted from her last apartment 2 years ago. No point going through all that court bullshit to get an order for CS that she'll never pay. Gawd I hate these women!
you're so right. and it won't
you're so right. and it won't happen again....
I agree with luckymomme, do
I agree with luckymomme, do not ever give her money without receipts. My SO learned this finally. Only because I've been telling him this for years. Once BM gave him a dental bill with most everything blacked out on it. I told him 'how the hell do you know what work was done, and if it was even for skid, and not BM'. Turned out - It was to whiten the skids teeth at age 23 because she had to spend 130 days in jail for a DUI and her teeth got yellow while in jail. Seriously...! Too Bad! Wish they had fallen out.