I don't know what you should do, I only know I can see it from his point. I imagine my SO feels like you (not the baby part we're both done with more kids). I'm in no rush to financially bind myself to anyone, and right now that's how I see marriage, my first marriage and divorce did a number on me, and often I just don't see myself being as being secure enough to be vulnerable and and take that chance again. Marriage isn't a guarantee of happily ever after.
So my question to you, why is it important to you, what does the idea of marriage give you that his rejection of the idea hurts? I don't think it's rejection of you I love and adore my SO but I'm just not wanting to marry maybe someday that will change, but it's issue I have it's not his fault.

I personally would only be with someone willing to get legally married.

I believe this is a respect issue also. Dont kid yourself and waste your time if he only wants to live together.

This advice courtesy of me and my mom!!! Hugs

This is one of those moments when you find out that living with you and all the 'benefits' this provides is all he wants.

One thing that worked for me with my DH was to point out that it is unfair to measure me against his ex. I am not her. I was not brought up like her. If you want to get metaphysical about it we are different star signs! So when he thinks I will turn out like her I have to remind him to stop letting her ghost as his wife affect our marriage. No, she isn't dead but her ghost as his wife pops up from time to time.

Only you know what you can live with. Just living with him vs marriage. One child vs two. Personally if you want marriage and he uses his previous failed marriage as a reason not to remarry ... dealbreaker..

I think its a question of security. For me to feel safe, and to feel secure in that sense- is why I remarried. I love the institute of marriage, but thats also a big part of my morality for me. Women & Men temd to 'need' different things. We think differently. We process things & enotions differently. I think your feelings of rejection are valid.

My best advice to you is to Not settle for anything less then you want & need. Security & feeling safe in a relationship/marriage/family is probably a huge need, not want for you. I know lots of people think that marriage is a piece of paper. I dont see it like that. Its a validation to your heart & soul as well-- that your mate has no plans to just walk off when they get tired, bored or when times get tough.

Dig inside yourself. Your morals & views are very important as they should be. Trust your 'gut' feeling. What is it that truly hurts you? Is it the realization of a commitment that You need to feel safe & secure? For me, it is. I had to walk away from a relationship before I met my DH. I put 2 yrs into a relationship with a man who proposed, then told me 2 mos later that he wanted to stay 'engaged' indefinitely. Broke my heart & crushed me. I chose to listen to myself, and my needs to feeling safe & secure. That 'piece of paper' is not just a certificate. Things evolve like with skids- taking you seriously & knowing you arent leaving, it has benefits too- like retirement accounts, iras, uncontested wills (if done right), health & life insurance, theres tons of examples I could give where a marriage is far more then 'just a paper'- both legally & morally.

Only you can decide for You what is important to You!!!! I truly hope you are able to resolve this-- but please-- never ever 'settle' !! (HUGS)

My ex SO, the man I was with before I was with DH, I left because of this. He said the same thing your BF is saying. He didn't see the need for marriage, it is just a piece of paper, it means nothing, he was burned before, why ruin a good thing, why fix whats not broken, blah, blah, blah. I did not have a child with him, but her refused to have one with me. After four years, I decided that was not good enough. I LOVED him like crazy, our life was great, better than what I am dealing with now, let me tell ya, but I could not get over feeling like I was not good enough and that he wanted me to be everything a wife was and have none of the security that went a long with it. I feel for you and I'm sorry!!

Ask him why you are good enough to "play house" with but not to have a marriage.

Why would you settle for a man who makes you feel like you must beg for crumbs?

These are big red flags. Why not find someone who loves you the way you deserve? Wouldn't you rather be with a man who would happily CARRY you down the isle rather than be with a man you treats you second best.

We all deserve love. That is why we are put on this Earth. To love and be loved.

While marriage is "just a piece of paper" and the "government telling you it's real," it's also, and most importantly, a LEGAL contract.
Based on his comments to you, it's the LEGAL CONTRACT that scares him off. Why? Because he's been burned. He got, in his eyes, screwed, as the result of his divorce.
Personally, I would never willingly have a baby with someone who was unwilling to make that CONTRACTUAL commitment to me. (I did, as I got knocked up at 18 by a loser, but that was definitely unintentional.)
Anyway, I think you sold yourself short having a baby with a man who doesn't want to marry you. I think you'll be sealing your fate if you have another one with him.
Only you can decide what you want in life. If you find that you and he just want different things, you'll need to decide what is most important to you.