Hello, so i have a ss who is almost 15. He came to live with Dad, myself ans sibilings a few months ago. He was grounded at Bms house due to sneaking out to go meet a girl apparently and according to his Bm was acting very distant with them while living there. He asked my husband to come live here and i was very hesitant at first and did not like the idea. I needed time to process. My husband was angry with me and we fought but i finially decided it was gonna be ok. He came and started school and everything seemed fine till we got a call that he was failing most classes and not turning in homework. He does have adhd so its difficult for him which i understand and is on meds. My husband had a meeting with all his teachers and they said he is more than capable of doing this work. I believe its partly just laziness and partly adhd. His Bm doesnt seem to concerned with his grades or schoolwork and one of his family members is a teacher so you would think they would help him more. He was failing all the time at Bms. Fast forward the few months hes been here. He told Bm he hates it here and is coming home in june which was agreed upon by Bm and Dad. He doesnt like the rules here which are not bad. We expect him to do chores everyday just like his siblings. We have a bedtime during the week even though we arent in actual school. We expect him to eat fruits and vegetables, omg the horror of having to eat healthy lol. We allow him to eat junk but not all the time. We dont allow food in rooms or basment. If grades arent at least c or above he is not allowed to go hang with friends. At BMs there are not rules like that and he wants to run back to mom because its the easy way out. He has said too many rules and he hates it. Although i think the stay at home order has not helped. I honestly think he only came here because he was grounded at Bms and he saw it as a way out. We live in a different state so its difficult because my husband has to sign a bunch of papers and change child support. Once he goes back to Bms he can stay there cause this going back and forth stuff aint working. Hes very immature and does get on my nerves but overall a good kid. He doesnt throw attitude much but does not have the skills that an almost 15 year old should have. Has to be reminded to close the bread, cereal. Smears food everywhere and always has food smeared on his face. Has to be reminded about homework constantly and has to be guided through everything. I have stepped back some and let my husband take over and my husband can see how difficult it is. My husband thought it would be some magical thing but hate to burst your bubble its not. I do not like his Bm or her family, they baby him and thats why he is the way he is. Hes not used to responsibility and frankly his future does not look good. He will be in highschool next year and its much harder. He is severly lacking in skills. Its bothered me because i worry for his future but i know its out of our hands when he goes back to Bms. I really dont want him coming back when he doesnt like it at Bms. We told him this is it. Thanks for reading. Id love some input although this was more venting than anything.