I am so glad to see that I am not the only horrible woman, with bratty step kids, and a nasty ex wife to deal with. Today I am just reading and venting.

Like so many others here is where I stand. I met my fiance through a mutual person. We got to know each other fell in love. I moved the 1200 miles to begin our life together. I knew about his kids and told him that they have to be 100% ok with me moving in they were. There is SS 16 currently decided to not live with us (more details later) and SD 9. She has some issues but overall not a bad kid. I like her. Then there is the ex. She is a piece of work. I think she is one of the least moral people I have ever met. She has no problem lying. Her constant sleeping around is what caused their divorce. She has 4 children total. 3 from an ex and then the one shared with DH. DH adopted the youngest boy from her previous marriage. Anyways... SS has a reputation of being a bad kid. I hadn't seen much of this. Misguided yes Bad no. Right now I am on the fence about how I feel. He has not had good grades and has been told and treated for ADD. I just don't see the ADD. He was not on meds when I came into the picture and didn't have the typical signs. I stayed out of the little things. Like him not checking in and just doing whatever he wanted. He wasn't disrespectful just didn't seem to have many rules. Then one night he was told to follow one of the rules. Nobody sleeps on the sofa. You sleep in your room. DH put his foot down and what does SS do. He packs his stuff and says he is going to his moms. Well I have DH call ex and let her know. She is screwing at her boyfriends and will come home but not stay. This hit my buttons, but since he isn't my kid I backed of. I was pissed but I kept my mouth shut. A few weeks ago I was in the shower and found some resin. I called DH and he went up and talked w/ police chief and ex. She is in law enforcement and ems. Brought both of them to the house to test the resin in the shower. Tests came back inconclusive. So BM is now all upset that we would think her precious baby would smoke pot. He has admitted to me personally he has tried pot before this incident. Moving on....BM comes to pick up kids talks about how SS coat has been stolen w/ ADD meds in pocket. I still question the stolen part. I as DH if he thought BM was acting a bit odd. I thought she was a little off. Nothing really comes of it until we are out of state for Thanksgiving. He gets a call from BM about how he was right and SS is in trouble for MIC, was found to have been hanging out with some kids that were shooting at people and planning on killing a cop. He told the officer trying to get him to take a urine test that it would come back positive. Now this little angel is on probation and grounded. Well here is where it comes back on me. He is on his first visit back at our house. I talk to him about what is going. Note he is talking with me. He tried lying about a few things I tell him not to lie to me. We talk about what his life plans are how drugs really are bad for you. How a lot of people who smoke pot all the time never really to much. We talked about what he needed to start doing to get his grades up. Then we go play darts in the basement. Now the next day he doesn't come home. I call DH and ask if he knew what was up as not coming home directly was breaking the rules of grounding and probation. He says SS is at his moms. Odd but ok. He is 16 and kinda just bounces b/t the two houses. Then it comes time for BM to pick up SD. I greet her and SS. She starts making snotty comments about how her son isn't a bum and a liar. This ticks me off. I don't believe in fighting in front of the kids is right nor snarky comments. So the texting war ensues with DH and BM. He defends me that I didn't call the kid names or do anything mean or cruel. That weekend I catch her at work at the end of her shift and the beginning of mine. I tell her that if she has a problem she can take it up with me directly and not to fight in front of the kids. She fires back that shouldn't call her son a liar. I tried to be calm and tell her that I didn't call him a liar. She snaps at me that he just wont be at the house anymore and I responded with that's his choice. She tells me DH never cared about him anyway. I got angry and glared at her and told her that she knew that wasn't true. I told him not to lie to me. She stomped off. She picked up SS and brings him to the house to pick up his stuff. She proceeds to yell and berate DH about the situation while SS gets his stuff. He packed his stuff and then removed this side of the family from his facebook page.

I am sad that he is being this way but he isn't my kid and to an extent if that is the type of person he is going to be I don't want him around. I am worried that the bitch of an ex is going to get SD to not like me and eventually turn out like all her other kids. Useless. DH does favor his daughter. I know this and she a bit spoiled and has her own issues. I don't think that she should be taken from her mom but I know her mom is a bad person and a horrible mother. After I confronted her she treated everyone below her at work like crap. Very few people in town like her but nobody does anything to put her in her place. I am not the type to let anyone walk on me. I will calmly state my peace then be done with it. She can dish it out when it comes to taking it she reacts badly. I don't know what to do about this horrible person that I cant stand. She is a bad mother, a bad person, lazy (doesn't clean her house), treats DH so disrespectfully it makes me sick, and completely amoral.

Since I moved here I have yet to make any new friends. I hate the small town gossip and stuff. So this is my very long vent and reaching out for someone.