My husbands 13 year old is a brat to me, especially when my husband is not there to witness the behaviour.
Hi. I have two very small children of my own and my husband has a 13 year old from a previous marriage. He lives in another country. He came to live with us in Mexico a couple of years back and while things worked out in the begginning, by the end of his stay he was insulting me, stealing things, getting in trouble at school, I found cigarettes and knives in his room. All this was despite the fact that I cared for him as if he were my own child. My husband and I went through a very rocky patch in our relationship because of his sons attitudes. Eventually HE (the son) decided to go back to argentina. He went on a trip there to visit his mother which was supposed to last a couple of weeks and just called his father and told him he wasnt coming back because "his real family was there". We went to visit him las year in Argentina and he was completely rude to me. He kept doing things that he knew would drive me mad and would wait until his father was away to insult me with the worst possible words. Things have been very cold since. My husband was very hurt that he decided to move back to argentina and that he continued to behave the way he has. His own mother insists that he is always in trouble over there and constantly insults her.
Now in the past three weeks my husband has had three very heart felt conversations with his son over the phone. My husband is now making comments such as: "I think my son regrets leaving us", " I think maybe he can come for vacation and stay a month with us" etc..... I am in a complete state of panic. I fear this child. He is so manipulative and knows how to act one way on front of his father and a completely different way in front of me. I am convinced the child hates me and I hate the idea of him bad mouthing me in front of my own children. I must be the worst person on the planet but I dont want him to come stay with us, even if its just for a month. I am afraid to death he would want to come back to live with us, I am convinced that would be the end of my marriage.
I would be so grateful for any advice......
Is there any way you can
Is there any way you can never be alone with this brat? I had this issue with SD16. I started calling her out on her behavior when she did it AND again when her father was there. It stopped.
You are entitled to have be happy in your own home. You need to tell your DH what you can and what you cannot tolerate and then stick to it.
i WISH SD16 would wait until
i WISH SD16 would wait until daddy wasn't around to pull that crap on me. She acted better when he wasn't around than when he is because dad lets her get away with it.
Don't let that boy treat you crappy. BUT if you ever feel unsafe, then just stay away from him and never be alone with him.
If he mistreats you and his
If he mistreats you and his bm, it sounds like he has issues with women that his father needs to take care of.
My money is on him wanting to come back because the bm has either cracked down, or she is at her wits end. I would not be okay with it unless the father understands what will be required of him. If he doesn't get what his son is doing and refuses to see it, it will never change.