Am I being a bitch?
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I was exhausted last night after a busy day at work and doing things around the house.
My DH was on the computer told him twice nicely that I was tired and wanted to sleep at about 1030pm. He said he'll finish soon to. Waited 30 mins still doing something on the computer.
Went and looked at what he was doing. He was writing his daughter's uni assignment.
I told him again that I wanted to sleep and also said why are you writing your daughters uni paper?
He got angry and shouted need no lecture from me and said that I was a bitch.
Am I a bitch?
You make a very valid point
You make a very valid point there! That would be fightin' words here!
No!! He is being an asshat.
No!! He is being an asshat.
Two points -- I don't quite
Two points -- I don't quite get the whole wanting to go to bed vs. computer thing. Just go to bed when you want to go to bed.
But no one calls me a bitch without paying for it. No one. Especially someone I'm married to. You may have different standards, but that's a breakup word for me.
I'd advice you to think very carefully and get advice from trusted sources. This doesn't have anything to do with your stepchild, this is about your primary relationship.
I think it depends on where
I think it depends on where OP's DH was in the computer. If was in the bedroom, he could have very well been preventing her from sleeping. I'm a light sleeper, and I find it hard to fall asleep with noises and extra light in the room.
True enough...that pales with
True enough...that pales with him calling her a bitch.
Oh yeah! I sincerely hope he
Oh yeah! I sincerely hope he became well acquainted with the couch after that...at the very least!
My SS called me a Pathetic
My SS called me a Pathetic Bitch last week, by text. He'll be waiting a long time to get a word or a visit from me. Thankfully he doesn't live here anymore, we kicked him out before Christmas, due to his outrageous behaviour and disrespect towards us. Good Riddance to him. You really need to sit your DH down and get him to apologise and to assure you that there will be no more name calling to you.
OMG!!!! I would smack him
OMG!!!! I would smack him upside his fool head }:) }:) }:)
No, you are not a bitch. He
No, you are not a bitch.
He has gone straight on the defensive and attacked you because he KNOWS he is doing the wrong thing.
I would wait until I was calm (because I would be screaming mad and would BECOME a bitch LOL) and then calmly tell him that what he said was NOT acceptable to you, and that if he wants this marriage to continue he must never speak to you that way again. He KNOWS that doing his kids homework is wrong, and also that he told you he would only be half an hour, you were patient and then went to see why he wasn't keeping to his word.
If he wants his daughter to succeed in life he has to stop enabling her by doing her homework for her - my OH does SD13's homework too - I've tried to have this conversation - he thinks he's "helping her" because "she'll fail otherwise, do you WANT my daughter to fail???" (like I'm the bad guy) NO, I want your daughter to get her shit together, take responsibility for herself and do her own homework, what are you going to do when she gets a job? Go in and do the work for her so she always has that safety net?
Thank you! she's 19 but never
Thank you! she's 19 but never got a real job.... She did few jobs but never lasted. 3 weeks the most??! DH gives her money, a car pays her registration, petrol and she left home to live with her boyfriend....
Sunnyday, I can't stop
Sunnyday, I can't stop thinking about this. We teach people how to treat us. I think when you let someone call you a bitch, you teach them that it's okay to call you a bitch. Maybe it's time to stop that cycle. I don't know your situation at all, so I cannot judge, but think about it.
Thanks everyone! He has
Thanks everyone! He has always done her assignments and lately I
Found out that my bd wrote some of her assignments too when she was in high school.
Yes when I said you are underestimating your daughter and she needs to
Take responsibility! His words" I just want her to pass!!"
I just don't understand.
I would have said, "So, I
I would have said, "So, I guess you are going to go in and do her job for her, too, when she starts working after school?" These folks do not realize that they are only setting their kids up for failure!!! Yeah, I want BS19 to pass...but I've never done his work for him, and I won't do his work for him in college. What I do is get on their butts to do their own work and ask help from teachers/professors, if needed! Like I said before, yet another person in the world who feels they are entitled to jobs simply because they have a piece of paper that they didn't earn! I've had to deal with these folks all my life, because I only have a 2-year degree. What usually happens is I get in the door and show them that with my 2-year degree I can still run circles around them, because I actually put the work in!
So, I'm guessing that the girl will be moving back in with him when she can't get pass the interviews, because she can't remember anything from any of the classes she took because she never really did the work?
Was thinking about this
Was thinking about this thread last night - the homework thing!!
MY dd8 had a booklet from health class she was working through - and was asking me an inordinate amount of questions (she was grumpy and just wanted me to TELL her the answers - no way honey!)
So I would read the question with her, then ASK her questions about it to get her thinking - but she was really crabby, so I sent her away and said when she came back with a better attitude and was willing to try and solve her own problems with a LITTLE help from me I would be willing to help her, but that while she was being stroppy and not trying then I wasn't going to help.
SD13 was sitting on the other sofa, and OH was sitting next to me. I looked up and there was SD giving OH eye rolls at me, and pulling faces like I was being mean. I looked at OH and he quickly became engrossed in the TV...
I got pissed (not that they saw it) and decided to have some fun with them. So I said to DD8 "I could just do the work for you, tell you the answers so that it's done quickly and you get it all right, would you like that?" she says "yes!" And then I said "but if I do that, when you have a test next week on this and you don't know the answers will you like that? Do you think you will feel good then?"
"ummmm - no?"
What about when you get your school report - when you got your last one and it was all good, and you did really well - how did you feel? Were you proud of yourself, did you feel good?"
"YES!!!"
And how will you feel next time, if I do your work for you and you can't do the tests and the stuff IN class, so it's got bad marks on it because you haven't really worked hard and learnt for yourself, how will that feel? Is that what you really want?"
"no."
"So, who do you think should be doing the homework - the parent or the child?"
"the child!"
Game set and match to me.
OH continued to be engrossed in his show. SD sat there scowling thinking of her last crappy school report against my dd's both having glowing ones.