So my goofy SS, who is north of 21 but acts more like he's south of 5, has an equally immature GF whom he's brought into our house. My bio son is also living with us, and DH had a royal fit when my son's GF stayed overnight once. Well I did too, but I nipped THAT in the bud immediately. At that point we made it clear to both of the guys, "Absolutely no sleepovers in the house unless you are married." My son and his GF have been toeing the line ever since. But my SS, who never backs down from a challenge, came up with a very clever way to get around that rule. This has always been his MO and he's only getting worse as he grows older.

So the GF ended up living with us b/c she's "having problems with her mother and has no where else to go". SS was just going to pay her rent for her while he lives with us, which was strange b/c she was always bragging about having 2 jobs, but DH nixed that because he needs to save for college (we've paid for the first 4-5 years, he's to pay for the rest). Why she can't go live with other family that are in town is beyond me; personally I think she threw her mom under the bus just so she and SS could live together, but that plan backfired when DH stepped in and said no way. So my husband listens to the GF's sob story, and allows her to move in WITHOUT EVEN ASKING ME FIRST. He tried to downplay it later but basically put me in a bad position; at first I felt sorry for her and was OK with her moving in "temporarily". Then I began to see why dear old Mom might have given her the heave-ho.

We've had to ask her not to take her 15-minute long showers in the morning, when WE'RE getting ready for work. She agreed to take them at night, but after just a few days of compliance is back to taking "shorter" ones in the morning again. She seems to have quit both her jobs and sits in our house all day while SS is at school or work (he's still home more than he's away - what a life). They eat out constantly when they are supposed to be saving money - somehow the plan for him to keep living at home was abandoned (I think around the time we asked them not to use all the hot water in the morning - the horror!). And of course they've had a little spat now so his dad is back to not letting him move out, which means we're stuck with her unless they break up for realz. Oh come on!!!!!!!! So now I have no idea if they're supposed to be moving out or what...

They used our brand new washer/dryer whenever they felt like it, so I had to "schedule" that resource as well. I also had to tell these two geniuses how NOT to wash a blanket with food and crap all over it (I was pulling dried food out of the DRYER). Maybe I should just be glad they are doing their own laundry, ha!; "Daddy" used to do it for SS (even after he turned 21) and I guess it was too embarrassing to let GF see his dad doing it, so he finally started doing it himself.

They act like this is their house and we're in their way. LIke there's no one else living here... They are loud and obnoxious and keep whatever hours they feel like. I have no idea who's in my house during the day while I'm at work. They walk out the front door and leave it unlocked for hours which causes me no end of anxiety.

And the last straw? I was watching TV when I could hear them going at it (having make-up sex after their spat) OVER the sound of the TV, in THE MIDDLE OF THE DAY. I can't describe how disgusting it was to hear them. I just wanted to go upstairs and throw them both out.

I did tell me husband (who's a Disney Dad with 4 D's!) that this was beyond unacceptable, and as always, he tried to reason away their bad behavior but said he'd go "have a talk". I told him if I heard it again I will throw them both out on the spot, and that I was sick of the double standard of them being allowed to basically shack up right over our heads while MY SON has to obey the rules. I've tried to like her, but she acts just as snarky and immature as SS. My husband has no problem with a complete stranger LIVING FULL TIME in our house, when he once made a comment about my son's GF "killing us all in our sleep", a totally ridiculous comment if you've ever met her. I've never said anything like that about SS's GF. Honestly, the double standards are driving me nuts. His kids never do any wrong (HA) but mine are deserving of cruel and derisive comments.

Well that's the end of my rant although I could go on. How do you all deal with double standards? His kids do plenty of stupid and nasty crap but never get called on it. Mine don't take out the trash and they're the laziest, most worthless kids in the world. My son loses his job and he's a complete loser until he finds another, while she sits on her ass while WE support her, but that's somehow OK..? I've tried pointing specific things out to him but he just refuses to see it. His kids don't have any respect for me, even though I literally pay the mortgage (we're both on the deed - long story). He has raised them to think they are the stars of the show and everyone else is just there to support them. I am losing my mind over the whole GF BS. I love my house but am starting to hate to come home at night because I will see both their cars sitting out front, as they surely have been all day. Setting a time for her to move out won't do any good, because they will just make up another excuse when that time comes.

Any advice? There's only so many glasses of wine I can drink on a weeknight
Thanks for listening... er, reading...