School...
My DS isn't even 2 yet, but I'm a serious planner...financial more than anything...
So DH and I bought a new house almost a year ago. One of the reasons we bought the house was that it was not only affordable, but the schools are really good.
Fast forward to now. SD is now going to the school DS will be going to when he reaches Kindergarten in a few years. The problem is that SD has SERIOUS behavior issues...I mean SERIOUS...She was kicked out of her previous school for asking a little boy to see his penis...That was just the straw that broke the camel's back...She had a laundry list of issues. That was KINDERGARTEN (who get's kicked out of Kindergarten??)!! So instead of her going to the school near her home, her mom got her into the school near our house by using somebody's address...
My issue is that I'm looking at putting DS in a private school when the time comes. DH thinks I'm over reacting as I don't want DS going to a school that she used to go to. Why? Because bad reputations get passed down...I grew up in a small town, and my family was a group of hell raisers...People knew us from generation to generation....and that negatively affected me. Though I didn't get into trouble, I was always accused and the negative was always assumed of me because of my older cousins, aunts, uncles, etc...It would hurt my feelings when teachers would talk to me all kinds of crazy and just never liked me because of the run in they had with my older cousin or an uncle 20 years prior to that...
I do NOT want my DS affected by SD's reputation...As it stands, all of the administrators know her...She's already been kicked out of stuff, kicked out of class, etc...They've even recommended her to have counseling...DH has been there NUMEROUS times, and they know him, too...
I need opinions here...Am I crazy? I'm very sensitive as it relates to my child...
I can see your point to a
I can see your point to a certain extent..my sister was 5 yrs older and I was always compared to her at school, but I don't think it hurt me that bad but then again my sister wasn't a trouble maker. If you really feel this is an issue you should do what makes you feel comfortable. I went to private school through eigth grade and it put me 2yrs ahead of public school kids by the time I went to public high school so putting your child in private school doesn't just have to be about your stepchild. This is your childs education so you need to do what you think is best, your not crazy, and you are supposed to be sensitive when it relates to your child.
She asked to see a boy's
She asked to see a boy's penis? Has anyone ever looked into the possibility that she was sexually abused? That's a huge red flag.
Yup. There was an
Yup. There was an investigation done. BM actually accused DH of molesting her. There was an investigation done on DH and he didn't know it until he was contacted to let him know he'd been cleared...He was livid. This all happened during one of the times BM would play games to keep DH from seeing SD, so he hadn't seen her in like 5 or 6 months, after he got a new court date and with through all of that drama...
DH requested that SD get counseling, and BM fought that tooth and nail.
At 5 kids play doctor and
At 5 kids play doctor and plays games of you show me yours I show you mine. Really that in itself with a same age peer would not send a red flag.
This is a pdf file to what is normal http://www.nctsn.org/nctsn_assets/pdfs/caring/sexualdevelopmentandbehavi... What is not normal is the freak out over it.
I would relax a little. As
I would relax a little. As for the question who gets kicked out of kindergarten a lot more now days. For stupid reasons. Google kindergarten suspended and you find many stupid reasons - zero tolerance = zero intelligence policies.
One thing the teachers will remember most is parents that do not snowflake the child and help work with them.....However, saying that and since I have seen and dealt with my fair share of school stupidity sometimes teachers/staff need to be bitch slapped. (Like not realizing your step-daughter did something very developmentally appropriate yet undesirable). Try to go in objectively because sometimes it isn't the child's issue but the teachers/schools inability or desire to actually help the child.
Are you getting her counseling? It helps if they see you/dh trying to get child help. Being active more than just when you are called up for misbehavior. Loving parents with a bad child is more accepted because some kids just have issues.
Oh, I got thinking you might
Oh, I got thinking you might want to tell to truth about were the child is living. The mom is breaking the law - you and your husband are guilty in someways also.
However skid will have to live with you - bm give up primary custody to stay in that school. Which might be a good thing if you can get the counselling your skid needs - just realized that bm has blocked that. WTF? Seriously it sounds like the kid needs outside help.
Does she have boy friends? Because her boy friends are more likely to abuse the skid than bio-dad.
If BM is lying to ensure her
If BM is lying to ensure her child gets a great education and there isn't an overcrowding issue at the school, let it be.
She might want to check with
She might want to check with state law....because it is her dh child and he is lying also. This can make him financially and legally responsible. Now if the child's address is the same as the dad's things are different.
Most schools won't look into
Most schools won't look into this unless they are tipped off, the child and/or parents causes major problems, or the school is overcrowded.