I take the time each day to teach my daughter to turn her eyes away from herself and towards others to see how she can be a better person in small ways every day. I teach her that it is better to include and be friendly than disclude and be ugly. Example. My biodaughter started a new camp a week ago, she has been going to camp every summer for her life because boredom = trouble and an idle mind is lazy, and I don't mean 24/7. Daughter talks so much about camp to Stepdaughters (2) that their Dad decides he is going to send them. Of course asking my daughter is she minded, which of course she did not because her thinking is more the merrier and they can have fun too.

Fast forward just 3 days. Oldest Step asks to go to very popular music festival in town this weekend to meet up with some out of town friends. Keep in mind that Bio and oldest Step are 10 months apart and when it is convenient for step, inseparable. Step asks me to go too so that her Dad will have someone. Never asks Bio even though they listen to all the music together. Then I find out that the out of towners are the very same boys that she just got in trouble for talking 6000 minutes too last month, mostly after the hour of 12pm. You tell me, what good conversations take place between 14 year old in the late night hours. Right. So, I think how the scene will play out. We get to the concert, Step wants to take off with "bad boys" and I am left with irritated Dad and or Step. Obvious answer, send level headed Bio along, who doesn't stand for any crap.

Talk to Dad, express concerns, suggest Bio. Am told that Step was already asked by Dad if Bio could go...she said no. WTF. Why, and Dad actually says the words, I think step is afraid that bio will get more attention than Step. again, wtf, so I say...so you are feeding her insecurity and her narcissicm. Just last week, bio could have made the same choice and it did not even occur to her, and Dad was so excited and mentioned how amazing bio is and how awesome her attitude is. Okay, so you like those qualities but you will not use these opportunities to teach by example. Dad still wants me to go and leave my bio home all day alone. F-that. I tell bio to ask step directly and step has the b@lls to tell her no to her face. while they are at the camp that bio has so graciously invited them to join.

I am furious and don't know how to teach my daughter not to take it personally without absolutely slaughtering the step. AND I am furious with the Dad because he is allowing all this crap to go on. this is core parenting stuff in my opinion. DO UNTO OTHERS WHAT YOU WOULD HAVE DONE UNTO YOU.

thoughts.....