How do you feel about your house key being out in the world bc of Skids?
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Just wondering if anyone else feels skeeved out and vulnerable because you had to give your Skid a key to your home.... We had to give them to ours because they are home for a few hours after school now, before DH and I get home from work, and they need to let themselves in the house.
And I feel like, how easy it would be for BM to make a copy of that key and... do what ???. Nothing probably. She's not a criminal so far as I know.
So why do I feel so icky having Skids go back to her house with our house key in their possession. 
Anyone else felt this way??
Why can't you just hide a key
Why can't you just hide a key someplace??? So they don't have to have it with them?
When they come back to us
When they come back to us from BM's, she drops them off at school and they come to our home after school so they have to have the key when they leave for BM's.
I thought of hiding a key but that didn't seem safe either... you know how kids are... what if one of the neighborhood kids saw them getting the hide-a-key and then knew where it was... I think I'd feel even worse having a key hidden somewhere.
I tried to think of alternatives but couldn't find one. I hate them taking our key to BM's!
If you live in a safe
If you live in a safe neighborhood have you considered just leaving the back door unlocked for them on the days they need to get in and you're not home? Or maybe get a password entry (probably expensive) And just change it each time they leave?
It's not an "unsafe"
It's not an "unsafe" neighborhood but no way would I leave doors unlocked. I'm one of those security minded people... even if I lived in a safe, country type setting I would never leave my door unlocked.
SO you can imagine how this is bugging me...
I'm thinking about adding a deadbolt.
I knew there wasn't really
I knew there wasn't really any solution to this... I was just wondering if others felt the same way, if they had to give their Skids a key and it was therefore in the BM's hands when Skids were at BM's...
I may install a deadbolt that they don't have a key to, and keep that locked when Skids are not here. If it makes me feel better, then why not, right?
I mean geeze when else in your life do you have to hand over your house key to someone who lives half the time with your enemy. SUCKS.
That's a good idea Just make
That's a good idea
Just make sure you hide the key to that since your skids will obviously see it 
And yes, it would make me really uncomfortable if I knew BM had access to our house...even though she kinda already does since we DO live in the country and our back door doesn't lock :/ She knows if she ever showed up uninvited she would be shot and charged with trespassing though 
Thanks. I just wanted to hear
Thanks. I just wanted to hear that I'm not the only person who would feel really uncomfortable with the whole key thing. I feel like DH think's I'm being weird for letting it bother me. He says well what do you think BM would do... come rob us?
No, I don't think that... she doesn't have any criminal friends or anything... I just imagine crazy things like, we are out of town one weekend and Skid says, oh mom, drive me by dad's house, I forgot there's something I need in my room... and then they both let themselves in my house... she comes in to snoop around... UGHHHH. I would be BEYOND furious.
We live in an area where
We live in an area where nobody locks there doors...but BM cannot be trusted to stay out of our house. Seriously, we know this from experience.
So now we lock the doors. We put up one of those locked key boxes that open with a simple number combination. This has worked well- even the youngest of our kids can work it.
delete...
delete...
ONE WORD: NO NO NO NO NO NO
ONE WORD:
NO NO NO NO NO NO NO
Funnily enough, I'm on the
Funnily enough, I'm on the opposite end of this. Both of my kids have had a house key for years. It honestly never even occurred to me that their Dad or stepMom might have made a copy. Don't know if they ever had a key to their Dad's. If they did? Wouldn't occur to me to copy or use it.
Mom likely has better things to do than come snooping unbeknownst to you.
I thought about this when I
I thought about this when I had a house key made for my BD17 and BS14. Right now skids aren't old enough to be here with no one here (they're 7 and 10), but eventually the time might come when DH decides that they need a house key (if we're even still together then).
No, I would not be comfortable with it. My bios don't see their bio dad and he lives in another state anyway. It would worry me if skids have one because then I'm betting BM would drop them off whenever she felt like it, whether we were home or not. Also, given skids behavior, by that time if they haven't gotten any better behaved (which at this point is laughable) I would worry that they'd give a key to a boyfriend or friend and not tell anyone. Or have boys in the house without us here.
Install the deadbolt, and
Install the deadbolt, and make it a habit of either putting a penny on top of the door (connect it to a string so it doesn't keep getting lost, or a piece of paper on the inside so you know if someone who had access to the keypad and code tried to get in there. If it wasn't either you or your husband (since either of you would put the penny away/piece of paper away) then you know someone who knew the code tried to get in.
Scary, but we did this once because someone kept coming in and "borrowing" my husband's DVD's, turns out it was our friend who lives in another part of the house. He's a friend but we had a good lng talk about taking things without asking.
My SD is 4 so I won't have to
My SD is 4 so I won't have to worry about this for a while, but I would definitely HATE the idea of her walking around with a key to my house! I would not be comfortable with that AT ALL, especially knowing BM. I'm not sure how expensive it would be to have a password entry as another poster suggested but that sounds like a great idea! BM may still be able to get the password out of skid, but it sounds a lot safer than having the actual key in their posession.