If it's just the suspended license, I'd stay out of it. She'll get caught or she won't. Not your responsibility, and if your motives are to "get her" I'd say stop giving her rent-free space in your head.
On the other hand, if she's driving DRUNK, you have a moral obligation to report her for the sake of the other people she's endangering. The problem, of course, is that the police aren't going to arrest her on your say-so - they need to catch her. So you'd need to know the precise time and location when she's drunk driving so you can tell the cops where to be.
suspended bc of multiple unpaid fines non alcohol related but spends all her money on partyin and other stuff instead of takin care of business - years of this s**t when it coulda all gone away
ya seriously bothers the heck outa me that the kids r in with her sometimes and she's already been arrested the car impounded but still she drives like she's given the cops the finger ya know? attitude like disrespect for authority an can't catch me! want to get her outa my head seriously but how? lives with us an I see her every day
good advice sueu2 although the situation is way more complicated than I have said. her dad and I have done so much to help, probably too much and loved too much and we are both exhausted from it all
I have appreciated everyone's advice and comments. Talked with her dad at lunchtime to explain what I believe are reasonable expectations in this - he agreed and will be talking with her tonight that either she does what she needs to do to get it reinstated or else she's to move out.
Because her license is suspended doesn't necessarily make her a bad driver, as long as she isn't driving intoxicated and reckless with the kids in the car I would not address it she will get caught one day and have to face reality.
Talked with my insurance agent and asked a couple of questions about someone (hypothetically speaking) driving with a suspended license.
They said every state is different and the contract between the ins co and the insured may vary also but most companies require valid drivers licensed drivers but probably would pay a claim but then drop their insured if there ever was an accident involving a driver with a suspended license with the likelihood that no one else would cover them after that...
I have no liability at all in any of it... even though I knew about it which makes me feel a little better... wonder if her mother realizes the risk she's taken.
I've decided to let the chips fall where they may knowing I am not liable at all. Her choices are her own. As for moving out, we want her to go soon but on good terms so won't rush her but definitely ask what her timeline is.
Not your car, not your insurance, not your problem. If SKid kills themselves or someone else it will be BM who is liable for the civil and potentially criminal consequences for allowing him to use her car. Insurance will not cover an accident by an unlicensed driver.
If you want to do your civic duty, call the police, have the Skid ticketed, the car impounded and she and BM can figure out how to pay all of hte fines to get the car back. SD is no longer driving and the public is safer than they were before.
The car & Insurance belongs
The car & Insurance belongs to her birthmother in another state.
If it's just the suspended
If it's just the suspended license, I'd stay out of it. She'll get caught or she won't. Not your responsibility, and if your motives are to "get her" I'd say stop giving her rent-free space in your head.
On the other hand, if she's driving DRUNK, you have a moral obligation to report her for the sake of the other people she's endangering. The problem, of course, is that the police aren't going to arrest her on your say-so - they need to catch her. So you'd need to know the precise time and location when she's drunk driving so you can tell the cops where to be.
suspended bc of multiple
suspended bc of multiple unpaid fines non alcohol related but spends all her money on partyin and other stuff instead of takin care of business - years of this s**t when it coulda all gone away
ya seriously bothers the heck
ya seriously bothers the heck outa me that the kids r in with her sometimes and she's already been arrested the car impounded but still she drives like she's given the cops the finger ya know? attitude like disrespect for authority an can't catch me! want to get her outa my head seriously but how? lives with us an I see her every day
ya, think it's time for her
ya, think it's time for her to move out she's had plenty of time to get it taken care of
thanks
good advice sueu2 although
good advice sueu2 although the situation is way more complicated than I have said. her dad and I have done so much to help, probably too much and loved too much and we are both exhausted from it all
Give her a deadline to get
Give her a deadline to get her ducks in a row and get the hell out.
I have appreciated everyone's
I have appreciated everyone's advice and comments. Talked with her dad at lunchtime to explain what I believe are reasonable expectations in this - he agreed and will be talking with her tonight that either she does what she needs to do to get it reinstated or else she's to move out.
No, she does what she needs
No, she does what she needs to do to get it reinstated AND she does what she needs to do to move out. Both.
Because her license is
Because her license is suspended doesn't necessarily make her a bad driver, as long as she isn't driving intoxicated and reckless with the kids in the car I would not address it she will get caught one day and have to face reality.
Mine does that too. I think
Mine does that too. I think it is a personality disorder.
Talked with my insurance
Talked with my insurance agent and asked a couple of questions about someone (hypothetically speaking) driving with a suspended license.
They said every state is different and the contract between the ins co and the insured may vary also but most companies require valid drivers licensed drivers but probably would pay a claim but then drop their insured if there ever was an accident involving a driver with a suspended license with the likelihood that no one else would cover them after that...
I have no liability at all in any of it... even though I knew about it which makes me feel a little better... wonder if her mother realizes the risk she's taken.
I've decided to let the chips
I've decided to let the chips fall where they may knowing I am not liable at all. Her choices are her own. As for moving out, we want her to go soon but on good terms so won't rush her but definitely ask what her timeline is.
Not your car, not your
Not your car, not your insurance, not your problem. If SKid kills themselves or someone else it will be BM who is liable for the civil and potentially criminal consequences for allowing him to use her car. Insurance will not cover an accident by an unlicensed driver.
If you want to do your civic duty, call the police, have the Skid ticketed, the car impounded and she and BM can figure out how to pay all of hte fines to get the car back. SD is no longer driving and the public is safer than they were before.