Mom not allowing visits from illness

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Hi, first post here. Just wondering if I should go back to court if the mom has missed two visits because she says the child is ill. 7 days days since last visit so far.

We have equal custody and I only have 4 hour visits twice week now. Visits rise gradually to 50/50 over 6 months.

How many missed visits do you think I should wait for before taking her to court for contemp?

She has not said when I can see BD again or when a make up visit will happen and said I was harassing her for asking so many times. So I stopped asking.

Ideally if I take her back to court I would get custody and her visitation until she can do the court orders.

Thanks

What is the illness?

Covid positive- let that pass and get her when it is safe.

A cold- knock it off and hand over the kid.

Agreed. If it's something

Agreed. If it's something serious like COVID, mono, flu with fever vomiting and diarrhea moving the child is probably not advisable but a doctor should be monitoring the child's condition.

I would not expect there to be a long interruption as most serious symptoms of illness only last a few days.
Anything less serious really should not interfere. It's normal for a parent to care for a sick child and you should be capable of doing so just as well as your ex. Either way you should be getting detailed information on what's going on with your child's health, not just "kid is sick so we won't be there." Keeping you informed on this is not unreasonable or demanding

If the kid has a contagious

If the kid has a contagious illness, I can see not having the child come over. BUT, if the child continues to be sick to the point that they miss multiple visits, there should be some doctor's note stating they are sick, and too sick/contagious for visits outside BM's home.

I'd consult an attorney and have them contact her officially. They can write her a letter stating that she either produces a doctor's note about the child's illness stating that the child cannot visit or sends the child to the next visit AND sends a list of make-up days OR you'll file contempt charges, and she has until next visit to make her choice.

You have to take a firm stand early. Allowing one visit to go due to illness seems reasonable. By the second, she needs to start producing documentation that the child is too sick to visit. If no doctor's notes AND no visit due to illness, I'd file for contempt and medical neglect. A child who is too sick for visitation multiple weeks in a row should be visiting a doctor.

^ this.

Missing or refusing

Missing or refusing visitation is not a court thing IMHO... at lease beyond driving an adjustment in CS.

I would be extremelyt surprised if the Judge held BM in contempt for refusing visitation with her kid.

Refusing visitation is the only advantage that an NCP often has. If BM is the CP, then call CPS and file child abandonment charges. Keeping in mind that path may end up with your marrigage being the CP marriage.

BM isn't refusing to see the

BM isn't refusing to see the child. She's refusing to let OP see his kid by claiming the kid is sick.

AH.

Thanks, I missread the OP.

This is all really helpful

This is all really helpful. I'm glad I asked here! She texted this morning saying she still will not do visits until she is better. I have no doubt she is sick. The mom just can't wrap her head around having me care for her. And is willing to break court orders to have her way. She is a very selfsih and mean person in general.

The crazy part is kids her age (19mo) get sick a lot. She just started Pre-school too. Does the mom think she can just break visists anytime from illness? That could become a very serious issue.

The court does say the person breaking the order has to pay both lawyer fees and the court order does not say anything about illness effecting visits.

She doesn't have covid that we know of. A test is pending. The mom refuses to get vaccinated and one of her other children has had covid before while the child was in the same house. So there is a chance

Side questions: where do you learn all these abeviations people use? BM I assume means baby mother lol for example.

Thanks again.

I would.

No Joke!

SAMEEEE