Hi everyone! I am going to try to keep this short, but also give enough detail for some good advice. DH and I have 2 children together, one of whom my dh adopted, but it is not talked about. DH has a son from previous marriage. SS9 was 3 when dh and I got together. Anyways, from day one with SS was a nightmare. He had "issues" but I always just ignored it, because I assumed it was BM feeding him crap. When SS was 4 dh and I saw something that warranted us calling the cops. They came, took our statements, and hotlined BM. This was on a Sunday and we had to take SS back to BM that evening. We did not tell BM anything about this when we dropped off SS. The cops told us not to say a word to her. Few hours later she called and apparently DFS had removed her husband from the home. Court ordered counseling. Nothing ever came from any of it. We never heard anything more about this situation. I was very nervous and scared to have my children around SS after this, but he was a CHILD and it was obvious something wasn't right in his world. Since then there have been lies here and there from SS to his BM about me and dh doing this that or the other. DFS has showed up at our house several times. The last time the showed up they stated that they could tell that it was just a pissed off ex wife trying to start shit. Now here we are years later, SS9, no longer wants to come visit his daddy. I have offered for me and my children to go elsewhere for the weekend so he could see his dad. SS and BM say he doesn't want to visit because he doesn't like me and is scared of me. I tried to fix the situation so he could see his dad, still nothing. Months later....nothing. The last few months dh has been calling SS to ASK him if he wants to come for the weekend or even just go eat dinner. Nope...nothing. To me, this is stupid...a 9 year old should not have control over the adults, but he does. Anyways, this has been going to for a few months now. DH was supposed to get him this past weekend, he text BM on Thursday and asked if he could call his son to see if he wanted to come over. Her response, Sure, go ahead, but you already know the answer to that. So, dh didn't call. He text on Friday and said can I get my son this weekend. She responded very rude and talking about how she asked him to go to counseling with his son, but he refused. No, he did not refuse. BM wanted my dh SS and her to attend counseling. That's not how it works. Anyways, she text me asking me what his problem was. I responded and said, this is between you guys. I have tried to help, but I can no longer put myself in between you, SS, and dh. She flipped at that point...saying that she would do anything and everything to keep SS away from me and that when dh found out the truth about what I've done to SS he will hate me. I have done nothing but love that child. Honestly, after the things SS has done to my children and myself I don't know why I ever even bothered, but I did. I completely gave up trying to have a relationship of any sort with him last year(after he called me a c**t)for about the 5th time. My bio children no longer want to see him, they have been questioned one to many times about his lies by DFS. Last time I told DFS they would need a court order to talk to my children because I was done putting them through this time and time again. My question is...can BM take dh to court and try to get it where ss can't be around me? I haven't done anything, but I no longer have the fight in me. I am just done, it's not fair. It's taking away from my children. And, no I do not want this child around me or my children at this point, but I don't want to be the one to blame for ss and dh not having a relationship. Help!