ugh. so we went to court yesterday for custody mods - there were three main things that needed agreed on and only one was. The others were 1) she wanted it in the papers that I was not allowed to do pick up and drop offs. the judge called her out on it and told her that he thinks shes using that as a control tactic. duh! so she didn't get that. 2) to avoid dealing with her, my BF has been taking the boys to his brother's house to get the bus for school. she asked they go to her house (her parents) to catch the bus as they've always done. The judge asked some questions then made the decision that the boys can go to her house to catch the bus BUT she has to come get them in the mornings and bring them back after school on one of his weeks. HAHAHA! she hates getting up early and she will now be putting a lot more $ in her gas tank - the drive isn't short, its about 25 minutes each way! So after court she went on her facebook rants saying she was doing her victory dance and was talking sh*t like always on my BF and myself which confused me because Im not really sure what she thought she won. Our friend actually printed out 3 pages of her FB posts so we got to see first hand what shes been saying. Her neice has also jumped in on the bashing. Lovely. Well, we have the boys til Monday and her neice asked if they could go to her sons birthday party this Sunday. At first my bf had no problem letting them go but now he's having second thoughts. Actually he just told me that since neither of them, meaning the BM and her neice, can show any kind of respect for us he wasn't going to let the boys go to the party and give up his time. So here's my question. Do we or don't we?? He wants to sit them down (they are 9 and 12) and talk to them and explain to them that he feels like he shouldn't be giving up his time for them when they show us no respect. I told him he should sit them down and explain whats going on but ask them if they really wanna go ( the party is for a much younger child, i think hes 5) and if they do then tell them he will let them this time but in the future they need to plan things when the boys are in her care and not ours and we will no longer give up our time with them. So what would you do? I feel like as much as I would like to stick it to them and tell them to f*ck off and never ask us for favors, I don't want to feel like we are punishing the boys for their actions - if they want to go. Also, we aren't done with court. We go back in Nov and I told him as much as it sucks we should probably be on our P's and Q's until then and maybe overly nice just so nothing back fires on us. Any suggestions?