Unbelieveable!!!!!!!!!
Well the EX H.. Where do i start!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Has'nt seen his BD for 6 weeks now other than one short night when he collected her at 2230 and returned her at 1030hrs.
Told our D that he could not see her any more than that because he could'nt take any holiday from work(he works 1400-2300 most day when hes not finishing at 2100hrs to run down to the GF)
Last Thursday my BD rung him at work only to be told her BF was on holiday, so she rung his moblie. Friday same story.
So saturday i picked up the phone and asked the question "why have you told your D you can't take any time to see her and you cancel your weekends with her, you've taken time out of work to spend with the new GF.
I got many mnay 4 letter words back!!!!!!!!!!!!! no change there.
The he phones later that day to say he'd taken my comments on board and he knows he has to be careful or he'll lose his D!!!!!!!!!!!
Then the the very next sentence he tells me that his GF's BD is going away on a school trip for three days so him and the GF are going down the Devon uk on a short holiday!!!!!!!
Where does this man get off.... Why do i spend my time worrying about his relationship with his BD when he can't be bothered to spend anytime with her.
Laugh of it is he hasn't even told his family hes got a new GF, and they phoned sunday trying to get hold of him.
Of course i told them where he was.
We've been seperated for 7months and will be Devoirced in 6 weeks and counting, as 22 years of marriage. I thought this man cared deeplyt for the BD how wrong was I... if i'd known what i know now i would not have stayed but left 8 years ago when the beating started.
Why have i laid awake at night fully guilty for taking his BD away from a stressful house and from him. When as soon as a GF is on the offering he couldn't care less weather his BD is a alive or dead. "BECAUSE ITS ALL ABOUT HIM"
Jesus i've made myself ill trying over the past 7 months trying to keep everyone happy and fitting my BD in around him so he can see her. Why on earth did i ever bother!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
MEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!GRRRRRRRRRRRR
Hmmm...
Have you tried talking to him about this WITHOUT mentioning the new girlfriend or what he IS using his time off for? You know how men are... they can't stand to be wrong, especially if it's the ex calling them on the carpet about something.
I think I'd send him a letter with a list of dates that your daughter will be available for visitation. Tell him that he needs to confirm with you 48 hours (or so) in advance and if he confirms, then he takes her. If he doesn't confirm, then he doesn't get her. And then leave the ball in his court and don't say another word about it. He can either step up and be a dad or not, but you shouldn't have to track him down to make this happen.
Stop worrying about it and stop feeling guilty. You simply cannot make him be a parent if he chooses not to be one and it's only stressing you out to try. You're divorced now - almost! - and that means YOU ARE NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR HIS ACTIONS anymore. Life is too hard... cut yourself some slack and let him do the legwork if he wants to be with his daughter. You focus on your new life and don't give him a second thought. It's not your job to work around his schedule. It's HIS job to make time for his child.
~ Anne ~
"Nobody can make you feel inferior without your permission."
-Eleanor Roosevelt
I hear ya
My ex made 3 beautiful children and now wants to forget they were ever born. He has even gotten remarried and they have another baby on the way. I'm still scratching my head at his selfishness. Why do we not see these things until it is too late? How did we manage to make babies with these a-holes? As long as your daughter has you, she will be okay. She will see him for who he is and hopefully we can be there for them when the reality hits.