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Tired of hearing "Daddy....."

exhausted step mom's picture

I am so TOTALLLLLY sick and tired of the "Daddy it should be this way.....Daddy it should be that way" and Daddy saying "okay honey"!!! It makes me just sick to my stomic when my SD(22) says those annoying words with that annoying tone.. and now the SD(17) has learned they work and is pulling it. The SD who is living with her boyfriend still has "daddy" pay her car insurance and tags and such cuz she has other things to get like her Dillards makeup...new computor....2nd pair of $300.00 sunglasses. Oh and she's getting married and "Daddy" had to give her $2,000.00 towards her pictures for the wedding as she has decided that she has to have a oil painting of herself. Princess is AMAZING! When my BD lived with her boyfriend we were told by the SD(22)that we should'nt help her out at all as she was living with a guy..and we did'nt..now keep in mind now she, the SD(22) is living with a guy and now it's "Daddy it's your responsibility". And my husband is so afraid of not giving "princess" everything that he has no idea how to say no. She will through a tantrum and not answere any of his calls and won't come to see him. Knowing that it just kills him! I'm just so angry and frustrated with the whole thing. And it makes me feel so sick that we NEVER help my BD mainly due to the fact that the SD both are taking all excess funds! The only time either of the SD's have time for "Daddy" is when they want something! What do I do? It makes me sick to my stomic. This Easter was the very first holiday that we traveled to be with my family on any holiday in 2 years and the SD(17) wanted to come because she has a crush on my nephew. He left the first day we were there and she started a Whole mess of crap because she wanted to go back home and see her boyfriend... She was rude to my sister and the family and totally RUINED the whole Easter day. And when she got her way and we left early...it was "Daddy...this and Daddy that!" What do I do? Does anyone have anything for me here!! I am at a total loss as to how to handle this.

NewBeginning's picture

Oh my God!! "DADDY" That just drives me insane!! LOL!

I hear it from the 19YO SD and I just want to grit my teeth clean out of my fool head!

I'm with ya sister!

BUT - when she's pissed...WOW! The "DADDY" word goes right out the window. When she doesn't get her way he's just some 'ole Joe from nowhere.

Whining, crying, bitching....she does it all.

I am sooooooooo with you!

leladawn's picture

Oh good lord.. I posted a while back about the "daaaaddddeeeyyyy" thing thatwas starting to get to me... But that's with a 6, 8 and 9 year old! 17 and 22?? I have no good advice for you, I'm sorry, but I can offer you my empathy... ((Hugs))

Oh, and, ummm... An oil painting of herself? Am I the only one who read that and went whaaaaaaaat?????

"You can complain because roses have thorns, or you can rejoice because thorns have roses." Ziggy

exhausted step mom's picture

Yup!! Oil painting of herself! And the princess's picture for the newspaper cost a WHOPPING $300.00. It makes me so sick.

NewBeginning's picture

Wow! Isn't it amazing that when your DH's daughter comes around you are expected to stop on a dime and be RIGHT there - for everything?

And money - be ready to hand that out as well?

Amazing!

My DH will freak out if I don't just sit right there when his daughter visits..if I leave the room he wonders what I'm doing.

She is now pregnant and getting married - she is having a baby shower this summer and I'm expected to attend this thing with her mother and her family - her mother has caused all sorts of trouble in our marriage and relationship so I'm not real happy about it - so it's been playing on my mind lately.

But - we'll see I guess.

exhausted step mom's picture

Yea the princess has a mother just like that she even went so far as to ask my husband to meet with her for a little fling! My DH told her she was Nucking Futs! But now with princess getting married I will be forced to go and attend the shower with her. And she is getting married out of town so Princess has planned that "daddy" and the ex her sister and I are to go a week early! Wont that be fun!!!

exhausted step mom's picture

Thank you so much for your post. I have read and read it and I only wish that I had your wisdom. I am a christian and know that God wants me to turn the cheek but along with being a christian I find that I am more human and want to just scream and cry. I spent allllll yesterday in bed ate nothing and cried till I thought my head would just explode! I love my DH with alllll my heart and if it were just my DH and I we would never even argue....but between the SD's and their mother I find that we get very aggitated with each other as we don't feel things should be handled the same way. Unfortunatly the ex has known my DH years longer than myself and knows what to say and do to get him to feel guilty and do what she wants. And I am at the mercy of just watching and keeping my mouth shut and eyes out of everyones sight....as I tend to look wide eyed in disbelief and/or give that angry look and want to scream. I just leave the room and go out on the porch and talk to my dear friend (my dog).

glynne's picture

This is what works for me: all I can do is to demand respect for myself and my relationship with DH. He still provides support to SD (27 years old) and probably always will. I don't consider that any of my business anymore. DH and & I both work outside the home and I have my own money and savings plus we have joint savings and investments that we both contribute to. As long as he holds up his end of the bargain - how he supports SD with time or $'s - none of my business.
Glynne

blondie66's picture

Hate that 'daaady' too!!! My SDs are 19 and 16. SD19 especially loves to use it and it's sooo phoney b/c that "sweetness" is never proven by actions (god forbid showing a shred of real affection for the "daaaady"). Daaady always precedes another set of requests for money, time, transportation, you name it. Then it's daaaaaady's birthday and she totally forgets. How hard is it to remember that? Someone must have told her and it still took her more than a week to call and mention it - needless to say, the reason for her call was something SHE needed.
"Daaaaady", right. Makes me puke!
I have a GREAT relationship with my dad. He has always been a great parent, giving, loving, caring and in turn I always LOVED him, cared for him and respected him probably more than anybody else in the world.
All the more reason to detest this phony "cuteness".

exhausted step mom's picture

You are so correct...I too have a GREAT relationship with my father and all the respect in the world for him and hearing the fake "Daddy" makes my skin just crawl. My DH last birthday cracked me up. The SD(22) purchased a pair of paints for him,after asking for a "loan", that "darn the luck" fit her boyfriend and did not even come close to fitting "daddy". So when she grabbed them from "daddy's" closet and handed them to her boyfriend my DH said..."I was going to go and exchange them" and the SD said..."Daddy he needs them" and then it was "okay". Yea...I think it is horrible that they don't find time or anything for "Daddy" except when they want something. They have no concern as to anyones feelings except their own. It's all about the princess's wants.