Ugh. This kind of stuff is so freaking irritating to me. I mean, does your husband understand that stress can affect your ability to "let down" and produce milk? Or is it, but but BUT! SD FEELINGS?!

My formerSO would get upset when I would leave to the bedroom to nurse also. My son also didn't like being covered (probably NO baby does). And his son (13!) would just come, sit and freaking gawk, mouth hanging open, at me. Bleh. Gave me the freaking geebies. Also, skid would turn the TV to sponge bob (which I feeaking hate) even if we were mid-movie - blaring loud, while watching youtube on his phone - also blaring loud. And the most crass, full of swearing  screaming horribile videos. Like even reading, typing or hearing someone say "YouTube" makes my damn eye twitch. And then would leave after I went in thr bedroom. So *I* was making ss feel bad cuz I wouldn't nurse in there. And *I* was leaving formerSO "all alone". It was *me* causing issues. Ooo, okay. I didn't give 2 craps. My baby was going to eat; productively and happy. 

Eff him and his guilt trips and making life revolve around sd. Look for some mommy groups. Or just start going to the park for walks amd such when it starts getting nice. Start looking for places that have parent/baby time - public library for story time? I know it's hard as an adult to "make friends", but what are your interests? Start there - look for like minded people.

You need friends and hobbies.  Make sure you are busy and out for as much if the time SD is present.  Take your baby with you.  

When DH says something be blunt and direct.  Build a spreadsheet clearly categorizing his SD time Vs his time focused on you and the baby.

Keep boxing him in and baring his ass with the facts and maybe he will eventually gain clarity.

RE: the breastfeeding, can you say something like "when you feed the baby you can decide how and where to feed him, for now since I'm the one doing it, I get to decide"

It's so annoying when SDs compete for attention like that - the sleeping thing hits home with me as our SD11 has terrible issues with sleep and needs someone in the room to fall asleep. My way of dealing with it lately is to remove myself from the equation. I'm not going to compete with a child. 

I also relate to the tv thing and I'm struggling with that as well, I have unplugged the router more than a handful of times to stop the noise. I don't like the tv in in the day and I'm thinking about starting a family rule about that. Is that something that might work for your family? No tv in common areas during the day? (If that doesn't work I might just start playing Slayer really loudly in the kitchen)

It sounds like you and DH could use a night together alone - is there a way you can arrange that? Maybe an at home date night since you are still breastfeeding? Sometimes it helps to be reminded about why you're together and what you like about each other, so important when there are needy little attention hoggers in the mix a lot of the time. 

Not to sound like an old person shaking a fist at a cloud but I really feel that cell phones are destroying family life. Or changing it, at least, and I'm not comfortable with the change. Can you express to your DH that it hurts your feelings when you finally have some time together and he's on his phone?

Your DH is an ass. You can have friends and hobbies and that still won't change. 

Your SD can amuse herself for 30 minutes. 

Normal parents, even in nuclear homes, are not up their kids ass 24/7.

Eventually the limited attention you receive from your DH will not be enough. 

Adult relationship is number 1. Then kids. Your DH needs to understand that or it won't get better.  Counseling? Workshop? Sadly you need to find a way to get him to see that. AND he needs to be willing.

That has to stop....she is 8 yrs old. IMO thats old enough to sleep on your own. Not to mention the two of you have very little alone time. This girl will turn into a full blown mini wife thanks to your DH's behavior. She already knows she has control over your household, I shudder to think how she will be as a teen.

that breastfeeding is a teaching moment about bodies and that it's not your right to teach SD those types of things. If he wants her to know about baby making and raising, he and BM need to talk with her about it. A very very  very open friend of mine would pop a boob out literally everywhere (BS then16 got a view of them) but my line was when she showed DDthen5 how milk comes out. F*ck off with that.

My best friend (of almost 30 years) and I both nursed our babies. We have never ever ever seen each other with our tits out. It's messy and uncomfortable and puts a woman in a vulnerable position. It's ok that you don't want to share moments like these with children. Your DH is being inconsiderate of your feelings and babyfying SD if she can't keep herself occupied for 20-30 minutes.

As I type, my DD7 is behind me with kinetic sand and some legos. She's spent probably the last hour making up stories and songs and building things to illustrate those narratives.

I always breastfed my son (15 months and still nursing!) in front of SD7 but I draw the line at changing near her/her coming in the bathroom while i'm in the bath and my husband has always respected both. I don't mind breastfeeding in front of her because I'd like her to learn that it's a beautiful way to feed a baby, but to each their own, some people are more modest about it than I am. But he's always supported me when I tell her to leave the room because I need to get dressed or when I'm in the bath playing with DS and she tries to come in, he'll tell her off right away. 

It's important to teach females especially about having rights to your own body and privacy in terms of nudity if you so desire. I like to think I'm teaching her that my body is mine and it's my choice if I breastfeed, change, or whatever in front of ANYONE. She was confused about me being naked in front of DH/DS but not her (DS is usually in the bath with me while DH hangsout in the bathroom) but it was easily explained: I don't get naked in front of non-related people who aren't your spouse. Easy enough. 

childhood home for the holidays. We have our own bedroom for me and hubby and our kids, his kids with ex sleep outside and do not enter our room. Thats our private space and the same with rooms of other siblings of hubbys there.

well 1 day with my barely 1 month old ss19 entered our bedroom and laid on our bed while i quickly took a shower. Came in and my son was crying in his bassinet, ss sat there completely ignoring him and fake put his arm on the bassinet the moment he realised i was opening the door.

He left immediately because i needed to change into clothes. A min later hubby comes in, barely a min later ss19 knocks on door and comes straight in, doesn’t wait for a response and hubby told him off this is private space for us and why is he coming in. 

I was breastfeeding around the clock and needed the space to be comfy and thats my right. Your husband does not dictate who you show your body to. 

DH used to be like that, but thank goodness we only have EOW (some times SD comes over EW). But he felt like he had to spend all his time an attention on her because she didnt have her mom there.  I am sorry this stinks. Maybe you should put SD in some tpye of activie were you all can have more time together?

Welcome to the club. You better get used to it or plan on leaving. These bio parents never see it for what it is. Being a step parent is a very lonely existence and you will always come second, third and be treated second class. My final straw was when I had no where to sit downstairs. The skids were sitting next to their dad. When I made a space for myself I got an eye roll from both of them. I’ve been nothing but nice to these kids and don’t deserve that type of treatment Plus I wasn’t even sitting  next to him.l It’s bad enough I can’t sit next to my husband but to get an eye roll because I want to sit down is ridiculous, mean and rude. Don’t even get me started on them barging in our bedroom and the bathroom without knocking first. When I was a kid even with my parents I was never allowed in their bedroom at night without knocking first.  Same thing when they were using the bathroom. They lack basic manners and respect.