SS playing with knifes should I be worried?
My SS who is 4 was recently hospitalized cause he cut himself playing with knifes. It was pretty bad they took him in an ambulance. His mom doesn't seem to care. She smokes marijuana and Ive heard she does cocaine. Shes had CPS called on her twice this year by the neighbors but they haven't done anything. She just had a new baby with another guy that abandoned her and she let's the 4 year old run outside at her apartment unsupervised. I haven't seen as in like 6 months but when ss was three he used to say he wants to stab people with knifes and screw drivers when he wouldn't get his way. He has temper tantrums alot and is kinda behind in talking. He talks like a 2 year old still. Doesn't really get along with other kids. Hes very hyper and plays rough. I'm concerned about how hes going to be when hes older. I have a 9 month old baby and am kinda scared to have him around her TBH. Hes said in the past he wanted to stab his brother and hes always hitting others. I feel bad cause I know his dad wants him to be around his step sister but he thinks it's normal him playing with knifes since hes a boy and he gives him tools all the time like screwdrivers and hammers. I feel the kid shows to much aggression for his age and am concerned that he may try to hurt someone especially since he plays with dangerous tools and already cut himself really bad.
At 4 yrs old, he is young
At 4 yrs old, he is young enough that you have a chance to turn him around. However, you and your husband have got to get a lawyer, take all your evidence and win custody. You need to be 100% in this and on board.
It will be a lot of work, tears, frustration and family counseling BUT you can do it. However, if your DH isn't going to fight for his kid, yes... you have things to worry about.
It sounds like they haven't
It sounds like they haven't seen the boy im 6 months and no memtion of dad trying. Yikes. Doesn't sound like great "dad" material, that alone.
Add in he lets him play with tools ans knives...
Yea... I don't know that OP should be taking on his other kid... she needs to RUUUUUUNNNNN!
At ss’s age my brother would grab a screw driver and
Unscrew the swing set when bored and my parents hadn’t realised this as they left him a few minutes doing jobs at home.
my 3 yr old sees me doing housework and replacing locks etc and also grabs screwdrivers trying ro unscrew the screws on locks when i’m there (him wanting to help)
some kids are like this because they are into playing or imitating being a workman.
what isn’t normal is threatening and saying you want ro stab people with knives and screwdrivers. Any parent saying this is normal should not have kids under their care.
how is he getting his hands on knives? Is hepushing a chair to kitchen bench etc to reach them? Time to put it higher up...
There's a big difference
There's a big difference though between yours who is supervised and the child in question here who, apparently, isn't.
Yes i know and thats why i mentioned this skid’s behaviour
Isn’t normal because it isn’t the imitative kind playing with toy screwdrivers but its i will stab and kill you... its very disturbing for a 4 yr old to say that
Whatever you do, keep your SS
Whatever you do, keep your SS away from the family dog, especially if it's a beagle.
Maybe the poor kid
Wants to be a knife thrower in a circus act. Then you really could say, "not my circus..."
But seriously, get your child and get out. Your DH is not parent material if he thinks 4 YOs threatening others with household items is in any way normal.
To be honest, I'm a bit
To be honest, I'm a bit surprised that CPS wasn't called in by the hospital. A 4yo getting cut because he was playing with knives is a pretty clear sign of neglect.
This kid sounds neglected by
This kid sounds neglected by both parents. It's one thing to use a knife or tools under supervision, but if he's threatening to stab people with them, then he shouldn't have them.
Dear Christ there is some
Dear Christ there are some strange views on abuse and neglect. My 4 year old has his own hatchet. He loves to help "chop wood" (he gets little sticks). But he never uses it without supervision. Same with the other tools he loves to play with like screwdrivers, hammers and wrenches. It's pretty damn normal in my world.
Yes, going to the ER after cutting himself on a knife could be neglect... It also could have been an accident. My 2 year old had my huge chef's knife for I don't know how long before I found him and took it. It could have been a friggin nightmare. He went to the ER this spring after jumping on the bed and smashing his face on a shelf. It was very "neglectful" of dh to turn his back for 35 seconds, I'm sure.
Should we also have our child taken from us?
Sounds like this little boy has been exposed to violence, but being that dad hasn't even laid eyes on him in 6 months, he has no idea if it's something the kid watched on TV or stuff happening in the home.
He's only 4 and is repeating things he has heard someone else say (again, it could be he's allowed to watch violent shows). He isn't some monster or budding sociopath because he likes to play with freaking screwdrivers.
Sounds like the kid just needs more supervision, but dad doesn't seem interested in the job, either.
This entire post doesn't
This entire post doesn't scream neglect to you? Kid is playing with knives and tools, threatening to stab people, cuts himself bad enough to be in the hospital, mom does drugs and doesn't care about his well-being, and Dad hasn't seen him for 6 months.
I'm not sure how accurate
I'm not sure how accurate this entire story is if dad hasn't even seen the kid in 6 months...
There is neglect...and then there is CPS neglect. Yes, in my opinion there is some shit-tastic lack of parenting and supervision. But under the law, one trip to the ER (how long ago?) does not a CPS case make.
I mean...how does that call go?
"CPS, hello, I'd like to report that my husband let's his 4 year old play with screwdrivers. Sometimes the preschooler says naughty things, too!! Oh, and like more than 6 months ago (the last time my husband even saw his kid!) His mom had to take him to the ER after being cut. No. No I wasn't there. No, I didn't see the child playing with knives. How do I know what happened? Um..."
ETA: my timeline was off. The ER trip was recent, and the naughty talk was when he was 3....
Right, she is third-party,
Right, she is third-party, she can't call - but whether or not she is able to call, there is still obvious neglect going on by both parents.
Hopefully the hospital called when he came in with cuts from playing with knives. As for OP, she should boot out her lousy-parent DH and then file to keep her kid away from SS based on what she knows. And to me, threatening to stab someone is more than just "naughty talk".
A 3 year old has zero
A 3 year old has zero comprehension of what "I'm going to stab you" means. When he was 3, baby face loved to repeat "goddammit" any time I said it. He would be saying it for weeks. We had to explain naughty talk and adult words. He had no idea he was condemning everything to hell.
I completely disagree with
I completely disagree with that.
So you think a 3 year old
So you think a 3 year old understands that saying that is a threat to kill? They understand killing?
Strange that our laws recognize not even most 12 year olds understand the severity of violence and the permanence of death....
No, I don't think they
No, I don't think they understand it's a threat to kill, because that's not what "I'm going to stab you" means. It means, I'm going to pierce your body with this screwdriver. If he's watched movies he shouldn't have, or seen domestic violence, he may know that "stabbing" means that you stick a knife or screwdriver into someone. Does he want to kill them, or know about death? No, not at all.
I'm not clear why you think this post is all just fine when this kid is clearly acting out some trauma and neglect, in my mind. Your kid wouldn't say, I'm going to "stab" you, because he doesn't know what stabbing is. Why does this kid know about it?
Just because I don't think
Just because I don't think they have enough information to pursue a CPS case or doom this boy as a sociopath doesnt mean I think everything is "just fine."
I'd love for the OP to clear up some questions about how she's getting her information if dad hasn't seen the kid in half a year.
ETA: my kiddo is really into spiders and we let him watch the cheesy "scary" movie, 8 Legged Freaks. Afterward he "threatened" to "poke me with his leg" like one of the spiders did in the movie when I told him no to something. We talked about it, he was reprimanded and he hasn't said something like that since.
My niece "threatened" to light her uncle's hair on fire when she was 3 and then she laughed and laughed.
I question how many of you have hung out with 3 year olds for very long because they say some crazy weird shit sometimes.
I have a 9 month old baby
I have a 9 month old baby and am kinda scared to have him around her TBH.
---------------
Your first obligation is to protect your 9month old.