Yes, I would say you should leave.

I find it interesting that you decided, for seven years, to date and partner with a man who has a child when you, yourself, do not want your own family, which, to me, means you want to lead a childless life. And, believe me, I have no problem with those who choose to not have children. I have many friends who have chosen to marry but remain childless. They lead happy, fulfilled lives and I do not judge them for making that choice. It's their life.

But it really makes no sense to me that, if you really want a childless life, you would actively date and partner up with a man who has a child. It seems to me that, the moment you found out he had a child, you would've been honest with yourself and ended the relationship before it even started. I think it's possible that you did not think it through with this relationship. Or maybe you thought he would give up his child for you. I don't know.

Do you think that it's possible that you could be taking out your frustrations on a child because you've made the decision to partner with a man who cannot offer you the kind of childless life that you want for yourself? You say the child has behavior issues - I don't know a nine year old who ISN'T a challenge in that department! But it's more frustrating to you because you really don't WANT children in your life. That's not fair to yourself, the man or the child. For seven years, this man has had to live with the fact that you hate his child. For seven years - since this child was two years old - this child has had to live with the fact that the woman his dad brought into his life hates him and wishes he were gone. Wow. That just makes me sad. For everyone involved.

Just as you deserve the chance to find someone with whom you can share your life the way you want to live it, the man and his child deserve a chance to find someone who will love both of them.

I would advise you to leave so they can have the chance to find someone better suited for the two of them. You will then be free to find someone who is better suited for you and your path in life.

I would agree you leaving on the basis that you want a childless life. You dont want a family, and you want to travel. This man has a 9 year old child. You have dated for 7 years now. This child will not go away. Even when he or she becomes an adult.
You must love him dearly to be with him so long, knowing you dont want a family and to be so far away from yours.
My advice, let go. Its not the childs fault. You want something in life from a man you love dearly but he cannot give you this reality. He cannot just shed his child like a shirt and toss it off and forget about him or her. Having a family is a life responsibility. You do not want it and you are not doing any favors for yourself, your beloved or for the child he has.
That being said, dont be selfish by hanging onto this man. Let go. You will find love again and look for someone who has no kids and has no desires to have a family.
My aunt has no kids and travels with her partner. There is nothign wrong with that.

This is a difficult decision, if you and your partner can talk like adults come up with a compromise and parenting plan you should stay. If your partner is refusing to talk to you about the issue I'd leave because it only gets worse if the guilty parent doesn't want to parent.

It will not get any better. If I were still dating I would run fast!!! It has been very difficult for me to love a SS that is hateful, disrespectful, and just plain mean. Don't get in this situation!

I also lived in another country with my bf and his "faux" son twelve years old..we also have a eight week old daughter...This past MondayI left and came to my family here in the states...This past week I have been living how I want, spending my money on what I want, not waking up angry and full of hate for his son, and most important I actually like the weekends again..It is Friday night and instead of being filled with dread, I am relaxing with my daughter in a clean house..and it will stay clean because there are no inconsiderate assholes here to mess it up... I am learning to live again, what kind of life is it to be miserable and filled with hate, and to dread being in your own home?