Really BM?
This last weekend was SD's 3rd birthday. FDH and I had originally planned a party for her on Saturday, when BM heard we were going to have the party on a Saturday (originally our day/night anyways) she threw a bitch fit and told FDH that Saturday was the only day her sister would be in town and she wanted SD a day earlier. Than God I hadn't sent the invites out when he said sure. So our party was rescheduled for Friday. No big deal. We took SD to BM's Saturday afternoon.
FDH gets a text last night from BM saying that her birthday plans fell through, and she would like SD THIS Saturday as well... Really BM, we gave you an extra day last weekend so you could do the birthday stuff then... Its not our fault your organization and planning skills lack. Why should we give you an extra day AGAIN? Saturdays are the ONLY days FDH gets to see SD for more than a few hours. (He works the other days we have her, and by the time he gets home there are only 3-4 hours before bedtime.) FDH gave her the okay for the extra day though. It really shouldn't bother me this much I guess, I just know, from past experience, that if you give BM an inch she'll take a mile.
I don't even want to think about what the upcoming Holiday season's schedule is gonna be like. We are suppose to have SD Halloween and Thanksgiving this year, and by 10 Christmas morning... I can already tell, by BM's actions, we won't get one of those days... Which normally wouldn't bother me, but I think my hormones are doing most of my thinking these days.
"I don't even want to think
"I don't even want to think about what the upcoming Holiday season's schedule is gonna be like. We are suppose to have SD Halloween and Thanksgiving this year, and by 10 Christmas morning... I can already tell, by BM's actions, we won't get one of those days... Which normally wouldn't bother me, but I think my hormones are doing most of my thinking these days."
Nope, not by BM's actions, you risk losing days due to your DH's actions!! Seriously, either parent can ask for any extra time outside of the CO, it's up to the parent being asked whether it happens or not, so your DH is the one letting all this happen. Every time he changes your guys plans and allow BM to have SD on his time, he sends her a message that it is OK for her to have NO respect for his time, it's OK for her to make plans on HIS days, so of course she will continue to do so. You guys know BM is not going to change, so HE needs to change.
It is a very common issue for all separated parents to have to manage their time appropriately with the children, when I had 50/50, both mine and my ex's family always knew to contact us first to check when we had the kids before making plans, even if that meant celebrating someone's birthday a week late or early, it's just the way it is.
If DH continues to allow her
If DH continues to allow her to do things like this, I'm not sure why you're mad at her? It seems like this is in HIS control, and he's allowing her to change the schedule at will. That's on HIM; not BM.