MIL Eating Crow and I LOVE It!!
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We tried to warn her. We tried to tell her that BM is manipulative and is only looking for money and a free babysitter. Did she listen? Nope. MIL continued to buddy up to BM. She continued to go behind DH's back and lie about communicating with BM when BM was making efforts to co-parent very difficult. MIL couldn't resist the power she felt she gained by being in BM's back pocket. She threw it in DH's face. She talked sh*t about DH to BM, I'm guessing in an effort to bond. We warned her.
And we knew the fallout would come. BM cried poverty and asked MIL for daycare money. Daycare is paid up. DH proved it. Now MIL is calling BM a greedy brat and BM is accusing MIL of not really caring for DSS.
Am I horrible for absolutely LOVING this?
My thoughs exactly! This is
My thoughs exactly! This is after my DH's birthday debacle. BM wouldn't let DSS come to his bday dinner because it was her time. Well who comes walking through the restaurant with DSS? Yep, MIL! Surprise! I almost freaked out on her ass. I just downed a bottle of wine instead }:)
I guess my problem is that
I guess my problem is that MIL is all too eager to play the parent. This is just a small issue among many, but i think any financial matters should be directed to DH, not his mother! For us, its about boundaries and respecting DH as the parent. But I realize that others may have different opinions. Different strokes for different folks!
I guess that I am mutant
I guess that I am mutant then. My wife and I would bring the kid to my parents regularly when he was young. Now that he is 20, on his own and in the USAF he visits my parents a couple weekends a month.
But I guess I am not a great example since my wife and I are still married. I suppose it is a good thing that my XW and I never spawned so that I would not have to resemble unreliable grandparent relationship facilitating son.
Both FDH and I have a great
Both FDH and I have a great relationship with BM s mom and dad,.... BM never takes the kids to see her parents on her time it is "her time"....
They both have texted and called both of us top ask to see the kids.
I respect you doing that for
I respect you doing that for the kids' sake. Our situation is a little different because DH is more than happy to involve MIL whenever possible. Problems started when BM would deny DH his time but allow MIL to take them or (my favorite) insist that he could only see DSS if it was at MIL's house. And MIL allowed this behavior! This was about BM's desire for control and MIL's need to feel wanted/important. For us it just meant atty fees to enforce the CO and resentment towards MIL. I still won't talk to her because I saw her behavior as a betrayal. She should have told BM to grow up and talk to DH about visitation and money concerns so that she could just focus on her grand kid!
I'm so happy they've pissed each other off.
This is great. Good on you
This is great. Good on you and your FDH on keeping it civil with the SpermGrandParents.
I too promised my SS and my wife that I would never deny the Skid a relationship with his SpermClan. However, every time I/we gave an inch SpermGrandHag would start her manipulative crap. She taught us how to deal with her. NO, NO, NO, Read the CO, call your lawyer, see you in court ........ This was the only way to keep her reasonable.
Not that she did not see the Skid. Her SpermIdiot son averaged seeing the kid 3-5 days out of his 7 weeks of visitation each year. The Skid lived with SpermGrandHag and SpermGrandPa during his SpermIdiot visitations. This is how my son (SS) got to see his three younger also out of wedlock SPermIdiot half sibs by two more baby mamas. All three of the younger ones lived with the SpermGrandParents who also paid their idiot son's CS obligation to my SS for the entire 18 years that the CO was in effect.
I am happy for you and your child that his PaternalGM is not the toxic hag that my Skids SpermGrandMa is.
Sincerely,
Of course you are not
Of course you are not horrible. You should celebrate which should include a significant amount of gloating.
}:) 
}:)
When the facts and truth prevail over the toxic blended family opposition it is always a good thing. Hopefully MIL will take this as a permanent lesson on dealing with BM and won't slide back in to her usual behavior when dealing with BM.
Though it is a great thing when the facts and truth prevail in baring the asses of the idiot opposition it does not fix that these kids will forever be saddled with the influence of the shallow and polluted end of their gene pool. Diligence in holding the opposition accountable for their toothless dipshitiot crap must always be maintained for the sake of protecting the kids and your family as much as possible.
Have fun while it lasts and do not lose focus on being prepared for the next time. There is always a next time with the idiot opposition. Unfortunately far to many of us who are living the blended family dream are saddled with toxic opposition rather than reasonable collaboration in the best interests of the kids.
For many years my own mother (I am a custodial StepDad) could not comprehend how toxic SpermGrandMa is and was convinced that she could not possibly be as toxic, manipulative and evil as we indicated she was. My mom even attempted to arrange a weekend GrandMa rendezvous between herself, my MIL and the SpermGrandHag as a bonding we all love the kid get together in an attempt to end any animosity. Of course that did not work out. What finally gave my mom clarity was a few times when my DW's cell would ring with a call from the SpermGrandHag who would immediately go in to profane rants when DW would not comply with the manipulative BS around visitation schedules, travel costs, etc..... When my mom was present when SGM would call DW would give her the Shhhhhh sign and put SpermGrandHag on speaker where my mom could hear the vitriolic crap.
To this day my mom is befuddled by how evil SpermGrandMa and the entire SpermClan has proven themselves to be over the past 18 years. My mom is an amazing, fine and good lady who tends to recognize good in people. But, don't mess with her flock. SpermGrandMa pissed my mom off by attacking my wife repeatedly. On one occassion we were living with my parents while our house was being finished. SpermGrandMa called the house while my wife and I were not home. Mom answered ...... }:) }:) }:)
. Mom shredded the toothless moronic bovine SpermGrandHag. After that there were no mitigating statements from my mom regarding SpermGrandHags possible redeeming qualities. She has none and even my amazing mom recognizes it now.
Enjoy and good luck.
Sincerely,