22yo stepson moved out of our home at 18 due to "unreasonable" rules of our home (eg being full time student or full time employed and paying us rent).  It has been wonderful having him gone,  but by living in an expensive area, head-scratchingly he has not been able to survive on his HS diploma... but has found one girlfriend after another to mooch from, each relationship lasting 3-6 months.  Well, current GF got herself into a real pickle getting herself pregnant by this loser.  She and my SS live w her mother and 2 young adult sisters.  They seem like a real dysfunctional bunch who I would normally stay way clear from.  Cells in my body are actually repelled.   Both SS's GF and her mother have complained  to me about the boy they foolishly let into their home, and now into their gene pool.  Stupid me, hoping that it would get his attention to try to, I dk, get back to school or some sort of job training to actually support this future child, mentioned their concerns to him, including GF's claim to be ready to "move on" if no change.  After having his "perfect and thoroughly-happy love nest" being put into question he dramatically confronted  his baby mama who quickly denied ever having said this... so guess who's the "aggressive" bitch who's trying to taint this fairy tale now?  Me :).
My gawd how I just fell straight into that one!!

I haven't had any interest in contact since this blowup, but now the SS is texting dad, wondering why he hasn't heard from his daddy in a month?  Gee, I wonder?  Maybe because you're a lying, scheming, manipulative, history-rewriting shithead?  Or maybe we can't stomach the newly-minted (and plastic cheap) professions of unwavering devotion towards your growing family, or assurances of your newfound gallantry, willing to make any sacrifice... to do "whatever it takes" for your soon-to-be-daughter?  Sorry, just kind of hard to believe that this little fuckup is prepared to make let alone keep any plans or have the first clue of what your child really needs.... an actual stable foundation!  This coming from the mouth of a kid who thinks that he is somehow the exception, the special one who's gonna make it despite the dearth any marketable skill.  The same one who argued with Unemployment when he didn't get any checks after being fired from his job.  Yes, fired.  Expecting unemployment. 
 After ahaving endures a physically painful gender reveal party at mom's (oh, and my SS's new pad!) during which we were treated horribly - mother didn't make it out till about 20 minutes of me holding her god-damned potted orchid to meet us, and  treated both hubby and me as unwelcomed intruders.  Seriously, I felt as though we were invited just to be treated poorly.  And only one sister showed when announcement was about to be made, actually crying- about what?  Still unknown .  I had to go up to her myself to introduce ourselves.  Creepy folk.  And all this in the full swing of COVID-19!  No masks.  No social distancing.  Coronavirus?  What coronavirus! And now we are being pressured into attending the baby shower, yes, in the same era of Covid-19.  I offered to host some sort of virtual shower, (I know it sucks) but mom said no, and wondered why the hell im all worried as "nobody from the previous party got sick!  So, we're good!"  Sorry, I have NO interest.  I don't want to see or hear anything having to do w that impolite, enmeshed, creepy bunch.  I'm not interested in putting a happy fake smile on, especially having been told directly how unhappy all parties are... It is truly unsettling seeing them flip into their delusions, and get pissed w anyone (me!) when I'm not flying the fake flag. 
I do feel a desire to have a grandmother relationship w my future step grandchild, but entering into their web makes me sick to my stomach.  Everything is telling me to stay away.

Can anyone see what I'm not?