I have been reading many of the forums and I have noticed that several of have been accused of abuse by bm. I am currently going thru the same situation and any advise would be greatly appreciated!!!
If their accusation is full of holes, plan those out in your head, to defend yourself. Don't discuss these responses with BM, DH if he is wishwashy, anyone else, etc. who will then have time to justify and work around your proofs. Talk to the authorities and don't waste your time on the others. Except to say, you are insulted they would even think you are capable of such a thing.
You can't go back in time but going forward just refuse to be alone with the skids. Always have a (competent) witness for any interaction with them. If that causes problems in you 'babysitting' for skids, oh well! you should be allowed to protect yourself from these accusations, even if that means they don't come to your house unless DH is there.
"A lie told often enough becomes the truth." - Vladimir Lenin
I have not nor will I speak to bm. My dh is trying to be very supportive, but he is very passive and I don't feel that he really standing up for me. I feel that if he would have taken his responsibility on like he should have when the skids were here I wouldn't be in this mess. I did spank my ss 2 times when he was here the last time, but I had a witness with me both times, one of those times was my dh. I don't feel that my ss wants to be here and even though he is young I believe he will do whatever his bm wants him to do. I don't keep my skids when my husband is gone other than for him to run to the store. I really don't want my ss to come to our house again, my dh is having a really hard time with that but I feel that if he does come to our home then I am putting myself in a bad position and I am not sure I am willing to put myself there.
I want to live, laugh and love again.
Accused does not mean you did it
If their accusation is full of holes, plan those out in your head, to defend yourself. Don't discuss these responses with BM, DH if he is wishwashy, anyone else, etc. who will then have time to justify and work around your proofs. Talk to the authorities and don't waste your time on the others. Except to say, you are insulted they would even think you are capable of such a thing.
You can't go back in time but going forward just refuse to be alone with the skids. Always have a (competent) witness for any interaction with them. If that causes problems in you 'babysitting' for skids, oh well! you should be allowed to protect yourself from these accusations, even if that means they don't come to your house unless DH is there.
"A lie told often enough becomes the truth." - Vladimir Lenin
Thank you
I have not nor will I speak to bm. My dh is trying to be very supportive, but he is very passive and I don't feel that he really standing up for me. I feel that if he would have taken his responsibility on like he should have when the skids were here I wouldn't be in this mess. I did spank my ss 2 times when he was here the last time, but I had a witness with me both times, one of those times was my dh. I don't feel that my ss wants to be here and even though he is young I believe he will do whatever his bm wants him to do. I don't keep my skids when my husband is gone other than for him to run to the store. I really don't want my ss to come to our house again, my dh is having a really hard time with that but I feel that if he does come to our home then I am putting myself in a bad position and I am not sure I am willing to put myself there.
I want to live, laugh and love again.
Hmmm
That doesn't sound bad to me? Has she made some official complaint somehow?
Maybe just make DH give any punishment, if he will! If not raise cain with him!
"A lie told often enough becomes the truth." - Vladimir Lenin