Is it me or do kids seem way too concerned over parents' business?
Since when did kids become so flipping concerned with all aspects of the personal lives of their parents / stepparents? My parents were happily married until my mom died, and I don't remember being obsessed with my parents' marriage as a teenager. Sure, I knew who to ask permission from when I wanted something and would hope one would say yes if the other said no, but other than that I could not have cared less about their dynamics. My SD is constantly observing, wanting to know how much we make, how we spend our time and money, making false comments about our relationship and generally just hoping our marriage will crumble. (Not happening, least of all because of her.) She refuses to or is incapable of realizing how good she has it, but would rather brood and be angry all the time. It's been the same way since she was little. I could see if I was her dad's mistress (which I wasn't....met him a week for their divorce was final) but she is still fixated on me. I don't get it ....
Right? I didn't give a
Right? I didn't give a flying fig about my parents' marriage.
My kids are 22, 22 and 26. They never concerned themselves with my marriage to their dad, they couldn't care less about their dad's marriage and they couldn't care less about my marriage.
I wonder what I did to make sure of that? Oh, yeah, I didn't treat them like peers nor did I allow them to call the shots.
Your SD sounds like a nightmare, ugh.
Is SD still under the
Is SD still under the delusion that Daddy will get back together with Mommy if the evil SM is out of the picture?
I honestly think so. I never
I honestly think so. I never imagined after 8 years all roads would lead back to me as the cause of the destruction of her family. BM (who cheated on my DH and continues to live with the same guy) became obsessed with us after we started dating which was almost a year after they separated. I could write a book about the psycho things she would do and she only stopped (for the most part) because I contacted her boyfriend. Fast forward to today, and SD told me "her life was perfect until I came into it." I can only imagine that her BM at one point has told her she would have gotten back together with my husband had I not been in the picture.
BioHo dang near freaked out
BioHo dang near freaked out when DH and I got together. I was a definite sign that he was no longer at her beck and call AND I was a better housewife/cook, which totally chapped her arse.
DH would no longer:
* take the skids on his non-skid weekends
* take Spawn ('Ho's youngest with the guy she left DH for)
* go to 'Ho's house to fix whatever (washing machine, furnace, etc.)
Once that happened, 'Ho pulled ALL kinds of crap trying to PAS the skids. She accused the boys of loving DH more because they didn't want to stay home with HER on DH's weekends.
Sthen16 started driving the boys over so she could scream at DH that he had to do this, that, or the other thing for 'Ho, and tried ordering him around. Never worked. FYI, SD would only come for visitation on rare occasion - NEVER overnight - when she wanted something (IOW, Daddddeeeee, you give my 'ho mother enough CS and need to spend mooooooooney on meeeeeeeee. DH was stretched to the max financially so she never got any.).
Both SD21 and SD24 (she is DH's skid) treat DH like an ATM. They only contact/visit him when they want money or NEED something (DH's know-how) or around Christmas time. Otherwise, they act like he doesn't exist.
SD does the same thing.
SD does the same thing. That's the new thing......."it's so unfair, mom is so broke compared to you".....NO matter how far my husband has pushed BM away (she literally repulses him) she still tries to manipulate in any subtle way she thinks she can. These women are nuts.....
They certainly are! And I
They certainly are! And I think many of them are absolutely incensed that their EXES had the gall to move on to BETTER. Well, some did! LOL
its also the guilty parent
its also the guilty parent wanting to share his private matters with his adult children in the worst possible way.
its not the skids business to know anything about their fathers life with his wife. i can only imagine what the skids tell bm.
Others have said this, but I
Others have said this, but I think with the money questions, those are most definitely coming from BM. One of my SSs was recently interested in how much money his father makes. I finally said to him "I don't really know what your father makes."
This is the same SS who is constantly having meltdowns (he's 11, so totally age inappropriate) over how he perceives that his father hates his mother. DH has said repeatedly, "I don't hate your mother, we just don't get along right now." For the last few weeks, SS has been melting down over "secrets" his mother told him about how DH "caused their divorce." Um, no kid, your mom met someone else - the guy currently living in your house who your mom says she's married to, but whom she never legally married, so why don't you worry about that instead of spending all day thinking your father is terrible.
He also reports *everything* that happens at our house back to his mother. Sometimes, I think she is recording conversations through his phone somehow, because she always seems to know things that I don't think he could possibly remember.
I definitely am guarded around what I say to that kid and have warned DH that he needs to be careful as well.
When I was a kid, if I ever asked my parents how much money they made, I would have gotten a stern talking to about how rude it is to talk about money. I also agree, I never thought much about my parents' relationship, maybe because they didn't have any big conflicts or maybe because it just didn't occur to me to care.
My parents were the same way!
My parents were the same way! Salaries were NOT discussed, and at the end of the day, I didn't care! At this point, I WANT SD16 to tape everything I tell her...After she told me I was a piece of sh** and told me to go f%$# myself, I snapped, called her a name and then immediately apologized. Well, she went and told BM the opposite happened...Also told her mom we called her a money-grubbing who**. 100% wrong and I think BM secretly wishes we talked about her (bad or otherwise). So SD will well up with fake tears, retreat to her room, act like she is 5 and hope it all goes away.