Hello Everybody! I am new to your site, but not new to step parenting. This is going to be a long post, so I will apologize in advance. My husband and I have been together for 14 years. I had a son and he had a daughter when we met, and had a daughter together four years later. My step daughter (who is now 16)lived with her mom, who moved her all over the place from day one. Eventually her mom met a man and married him. A year after they married, my step daughter confided in me that her step father was no longer living with them as he had been "touching her" He was arrested and an investigation began. Eventually the charges were stayed as there wasn't enough evidence. My husband was amazing through it all. We encouraged her to talk about it and suggested counseling. However, we couldn't make that happen as she lived two hours away. We spoke to a lawyer, but there was nothing we could do. A year later, my SD called us from a boarding school. Her mom had sent her there without any of us knowing. Then, her mom let him back into her life. For a year and a half she continued a relationship with my SD's abuser. After being in the boarding school for a year, my SD told us she hated it there and wanted to come and live with us, she was lonely and needed her family. Things were not good between her and her mother. We were picking her up every weekend from school and bringing her to our home. We insisted she finish the school year out there, but began the legal process to have her come and live with us. In June, she officially moved into our home. Our lives have since been turned upside down. I don't want to say that I regret letting her come live with us, but it has caused major strain on our family. Especially between my husband and I. In October, she reconciled with her mom. Her mother owns a rental property in the city that is empty, and has been coming in on the weekends. My SD has been spending weekends with her. This week everything blew up. Her and I got into a very heated argument. She proceeded to tell my husband that she thinks I hate her and that I treat her differently when he isn't around. I sat down and talked with her last night and asked her why she feels that way and what can I do to fix it. I have no idea where those comments are coming from. She wouldn't answer me. She kept saying "I don't know" After 45 minutes of prodding, she told me that she misses living with her mom. She says her mom plans to move to the city soon and she wants to live with her. I have not told my husband this because it will break his heart. I told her that she would have to talk to him about it. I don't know what to do. I can't stop thinking about it. I don't think it is fair what she is doing. She can't just change her mind day to day about her living situation, but I feel like my hands are tied here. I am just the Step Mom. Any suggestions?