I just sent this to BM

Forums:

I dont mind asking any question. Ive asked my husband a few ikki and personal questions in the past, they dont bother me...

This might sound a little weird but I was wondering if we could be blunt with eachother. Its been 6 and a half years since ive been with d! And we have never really talked about our feeling toward everything in detail. Yea theres been a few times we have been nasty on facebook and in the past but I want to get more into deatail. If thats cool with you?!

1. Do you think I took D from you?
2. How do you feel about D to this day?
3. How do you feel about me to this day?
4. Did you want a divorce?
5. What exacly happend between you and D? What brought the divorce in play?
6. Is there anything you would like to say to D if you had the chance? or me?
7. Do you wish things were different?
8. ...

There are alot more question that I would love to ask but I cant think of them right now. I know D half of the story on most things, i just would like to know your half. I think this would be nice to get everything out in the open! Maybe this can help all of us move on from hating eachother so much? If you have anything you want to ask me, ask away!

I don't know what to say to

I don't know what to say to this, except "WOW!"

Oh, and is this a typo? Its been 6 and a half years since ive been with d! This line confused me. Has it been 6 1/2 yrs since their divorce?

My ex H's girlfriend asked me

My ex H's girlfriend asked me why we broke up. I told her that it was exactly as the papers said, irreconcileable differences. I chose not to tell her that he broke his hand on the back of my head...idiot!! I believed that her own experiences of him would be different to mine. He might never smack her, he might never get angry with her, or any of the negative things that happened while I was married to him. I could have divorced him because of violence but that would hurt the kids relationship with him and they are important to me. I most certainly would not go into any intimate details with anyone about my relationships. Those are private.
When our girl here asks intimate details I ask her what prompted her to ask. Often it's BM asking if we are 'getting along' here. What business it is of hers I'll never know because I do not dignify that crap. BM believed that she could still ask DH to come fix things for her etc. We did it for a while, out of consideration for the kids but the kids all came to live with us so, hey, no need to appease anyone over there!! Cuckoo birds dropped their eggs in our nest, brood parasites!! I would like very much never to see or hear from BM for the rest of my days but I'd be foolish to anticipate that.

I have been with him for the

I have been with him for the past 6 1/2 years. Him and his ex were seperated for about a year b4 that. The divorece was final 2 years after we got together. We have been married for 2 1/2 years now!

I think you'll be giving her

I think you'll be giving her the control card. She won't respond, she will just think... Who the heck is she to ask me these things.... And when she doesn't respond it'll bug you a lot.

Why do you want to know these answers? If you must know, I suggest face to face.

We dont live in the same

We dont live in the same state.

I think this email will help all of us move on from all the hate. If all of us got everything out in the open. And if it doesnt then oh well i guess, at least I tried!

OK, got ya! After all this

OK, got ya! After all this time, why the interest in the answers to these questions? I'm assuming you've already asked the same of your husband; did you not find his answers satisfactory? Does your husband know you've contacted his ex-wife with these questions, and what does he think about it?

Personally, I think it's a little weird, but my relationship (we have none) with the ex-wife might be different.

BM and I have tried to be

BM and I have tried to be friends in the past but that didn't work out. We have talked b4 about a lot of things but never our feelings when it comes to everything and our thoughts on everything. I have talked to my husband about his past with her and his feelings and thought and i do trust his answers, but that's only 1 side of the story, so i like to know the other side of every story if possible. it helps me understand things better!

My husband is at work for the next week but when he gets home I will tell him about this email and let him read everything. He wont care that i sent it. He wont get mad.

I think this email will help

I think this email will help all of us move on from all the hate
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Oh honey. I think you are wrong on this. I hope I am wrong, but I think you are going to regret sending it. IF she answers, you may find out more than you want to know, or she may lie just to stir the pot.

To me, it looks like you don't trust what your DH has told you and you want to know HER truth. Not good.

Like I said I belive my

Like I said I belive my husband, I just like to know the other side of the story on what people have to say is all. trust me I know their sex life, and other gross things, this email wont bother me at all

I know what it's like to have

I know what it's like to have these unanswered (or partially answered) questions.

Especially now that I KNOW why BM acted/acts so crazy and psychotic. At least I have SOME sympathy for her.

I was told by H they had been over for 2 years...turns out, in truth, it was 2 months. AND, they had been on-again, off-again their ENTIRE relationship so I am sure it came as quite a SHOCK when I "stole" him away from her!

In my own defense, I had no reason not to believe him. He had his own place and only went to BMs when she needed someone to babysit (as that was the only way she'd let him see his kids at the time).

I tried to "friend" her on FB but she blocked me. So I guess she's not over it even though she is married and pregnant. BUT - then I think - How can she be "over it" if she has never known I went into my relationship thinking they had been done for 2 years!

I hope it works out the way

I hope it works out the way you intended, and she accepts it as a form of communication.

I myself would never have the nerve to send BM anything like this. It leave you in a vunerable position

I think something like this

I think something like this gives BM to make things really really nasty between all 3 of you. It gives her the power to spew all kinds of U.G.L.Y. that will likely raise questions & create serious catastrophe. Why the need to go "there"?

I'm with Willow in that BM will likely spill truths that DH hasn't felt the need to spill & chances are if what she says has truth to it, it will be heavily embellished with nasties.

In my opinion, you have the information your DH has shared. You trust him to be honest with you. You should've left it alone.

Good for you Willow!! I am

Good for you Willow!! I am not going to be one to tell you it is a bad idea. I have heard the story myself from both BF and BM. It so happens we are all friends including BM's new husband (we were all friends before they got married another huge long story I might get to it one day) I do not think you are in the wrong for wanting to know the answer to any of the questions you have asked, in a way it helps you respects the BM's feelings on things a bit more and hopefully she you as well. Good luck with the email's hopefully they do not turn into a fight, maybe you guys could talk on the phone and really get everything out on the table, who knows? Crazier things have happened!!

Thank You!

You should see us we have a

You should see us we have a very abnormal situation lol. We spend holidays and birthday together, and sadly for my BF well we gang up on him sometimes, we think it's funny. As far as the skids go well lets put it this way they never get away with anything lol. So again I applaud you for taking the step to try to better your relationship with your BM, things do go much more smoothly in my opinion.

*Disclaimer* this is not for everyone so don't flame me because it may not work for you I am simply encouraging her because she wants to try for a better relationship and to me there is no need in trying to make her feel bad or think she is destined for failure. Every situation is different. *Disclaimer*

and oops i got names mixed up

and oops i got names mixed up i didnt mean williow i meant love for animals

I think most people are

I think most people are curious about their spouses Xs. But, I would not ask. I much prefer to know that I am my wife's present and future. All the SpermIdiot has of he is her past.

I intend to keep things that way. I don't ask but my wife does tell. What the toothless moron SpermIdiot has to say does not interest me in the least.

As it should be I think.