Coal in her stocking....

Forums:

Do we have to buy my SD a Christmas present if she has acted absolutely horrible this year? i.e.

1. told my DH that she doesn't like him.
2. lied to her mother and said that I killed our pet bird which was brought up in court...(was cleared up after her mother admitted that it was a lie)
3. said that she doesn't like me
4. wrote a nastly letter to DH because I bought her clothes at Marshall's
5. wrote multiple nasty letters to DH
6. constantly disrespected me during her summer visitation (that was the last time we saw her)
7. has canceled all of her visitations since this summer
8. refuses to return phone calls or e-mails from DH
9. called DH a liar
10. called DH a jerk
11. referred to my 6 month old babay as "stupid"
12. constantly complains that my 8 year old son is "annoying"
13. ect. ect. ect.

If she were my child

If she were my child she would get nothing, not even a lump of coal. How old is she? Is she old enough to understand that bad behavior carries consequences? She definitely should not be rewarded for bad behavior. Are you willing to lay odds that DH will get her something anyway?

She is 13. He'd better not.

She is 13. He'd better not. I think he might be too lazy to actually go and mail anything. He's pretty mad at her. She's supposed to spend Christmas with us but we're trying to get her to cancel. We sent an e-mail saying that we're not buying gifts this year, we're donating to charity instead. We really do donate, but Santa is buying gifts for the other kids. She is the most manipulating individual that I know. She's better than any ADULT I know! She runs around getting people to feel sorry for her and making us look bad. She told my DH's brother how she misses her dad and yada yada so my DH felt bad and called her. DUMB! She refused to speak to him. She is rotten!

Buy her a book....

Buy her a book for Christmas, one geared for teenagers that teaches them respect for their parents. I think that is a better option than omitting a present altogether. Christmas presents that she wants herself would be a reward for her. If you get her something that can help her behavior, you are still showing that she is loved, even though she is a brat, and at the same time, letting her know she will not be rewarded.

Best of luck!