You are here

Anyone else think this is odd behavior

Bethmay97's picture

SS JUST turned 13. SS13 will sleep till 11 or 12 in the morning (non-school days) then get up and play video games pretty much all day.  This happens at BOTH BM and DH house.  He will Occasionally take a break to  chase my poor Spaniel around the house or jump on the furniture. If DH tells SS to stop SS will go back to playing video games. Yes DH has tried to get SS involved in sports, outdoor activities and even indoor games. SS has little or no interest. Before COVID we could get SS to go on a hike or swim Casually but since the lockdown SS pretty much just plays video games. BM  complains ALL the time to DH that she HATES SS playing VG's all the time BUT continues to allow it at her house. Honestly I think BM is lazy and wants DH to "fix" the problem. The reason BM complains 24/7 to DH about it. 
 

It's so weird because I see other kids out riding bikes or reading outside. SS would never do this. It's like he only does a few things VGs, running and chasing my Spaniel. It's like the kid has no imagination or something. Thoughts??

 

BethAnne's picture

Some kids need a push to do things other than video games. Your ss is one of them, my sd is another. I just had a conversation with my husband about how to give sd that push. Your husband and his ex seem to think that parenting involves standing around complaining that a kid doesn't do what you want them to do rather than pushing kids to do what you want them to do. Sometimes they have to be the big bad parent (noun) in order to parent (verb). So no, his behavior is not odd in my experience. 

Dogmom1321's picture

Parents are lazy and don't give consequences. Don't like that they are playing video games? Be the PARENT and take them away! But that would mean the parents have to interact with their own children and no more technology babysitters... SMH

CoD are often worse when it comes to this because each bio parent usually just blames the other house for "enabling" the behavior when they are just as bad. 

Lizzylemon's picture

Unfortunately these lazy parents want to use the electronics as a babysitter so they can get a pass for not teaching their child the basics of life, like how to ride a bike. I had the same issue so I immediately set limits on the electronics for specific times of each day for sd9. Dh not on board? That sounds like a personal problem dh! This is how we do it in this house! I go full blown North Korea on everyone in the house to get these feral people to obey house rules and it works for me.
 

I suggest setting specific acceptable screen times for this child and having the child check the electronics out from you like he would a library book. show dh the studies that reccomend 1-2 hours of electronics per day over and over again until it sinks in. Remind him you have the child's best interest In mind. Good luck! 

Bethmay97's picture

Neither DH or BM use electronics as a babysitter and BOTH hate SS playing them BUT Neither will lay down rules regarding them. 
 

DH is playing the "Disney dad" and does not want SS to get Angry and not come over anymore. So pretends" to BM it's not to bad so DH does not have to control SS Video gaming at our house which in turn would piss SS off. DH will try and bribe SS to do other things. 
 

BM complains EVERY chance she gets but won't step up and fix the issue at her house either. I firmly believe she's wanting DH to make the first move or be the one to fix the problem the reason she's Constantly throwing it in DH face. 

I of course have zero say and only care because I don't want SS to be 30 yrs old living in our basement playing video games.
 

 

BethAnne's picture

Keeping the kid quiet and happy using video games sounds like an electronic babysitter to me. 

Left out mama's picture

Ss behavior is not unusual. He's just lazy. 
 He's doing it because no body is telling him "no". They complain but don't do anything.

but if neither of his parents like him playing video games all the time, why do they let him? Tell him if he wants to "chase" the dog around, then take the dog for walk, take him outside and play fetch