I am so angry...
With the last episode with the BM and the hair gel and her sending my SS17 into MY house to remove it from where I said to put it, I told my husband things were going to change, and change from this point on.
With my SS11, he is no longer allowed to bring anything in MY house from his mother, she can keep the shit at her house. He is also not allowed to keep anything in his brother's room from BM or SS17 will also lose his privilege of having anything brought in by her.
Now, with my SS17, he has been a disrespectful self-centered piece of crap towards me since day 1 (which also include numerous lies to me and to everybody about me) Needless to say I have been disengaged from this kid for awhile now.
I told my DH to tell SS17 that if he ever comes into my house and does something like that again simply because BM says so, his ass would be grounded. He was also to tell him that if he lets his brother keep crap from BM in his room, simply because BM said so, he would also lose his privileges. And, until he lost his "my mommy said so attitude" and fix all the problems he caused, he will no longer have "play dates" (friends who disrespect me)at our house.
My DH did not disagree with anything that I said, actually he made it sound like he agreed and was willing to go along with it. I told him "there was only room for one person in this house, BM or ME". Said he chose me and that he would back me up. Great!!!
He went down and had a talk with SS17 for a bit, and when DH came back up I asked him what he said to SS17. He says "you know what I told him"
Bull-shit is what it was.
Yesterday, SS17 decides to come home to get his computer to take to Grandma's house and in walks one of his POS friends. I said to my husband "boy, he can't listen at all, he brought someone in the house" and then I said "you didn't tell him did you?" DH said "nope". So of course I wanted to know WHY. He said "had alot to tell him, couldn't remember everything" WTF, you had tree things to tell him. DH said "I'm watching a show right now, I don't have time to talk about it".
So I went to sleep and can't stand to look at him this AM. So, here's the thing. I'm thinking when SS17 brings his POS friends to my house, I should just take my kids and leave while they are here???
I am so sick and tired of feeling like a second class citizen in my own home.
What do I do???
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I would
address SS, DH and POS friends in front of each other so that there was no misunderstanding. All who don't like it can get the eff out! Those whose names are not on the lease, mortgage or other bills and do not contribute do not get a vote PERIOD!
Just because one opens her legs twice, does not a mother make! ~ ME ~ }:-P
Thats what I was going to write!
I would confront them when they walk in the door--hopefully your H will be in the room (or call him over). Say something like " oh well I see your father forgot to go over the rule about your friends in the house. "friend" please wait outside for SS" then let H take over, if he doesn't chime in and tell SS the rule.
Your H is likely to drag his feet on this for a very long time, I'm sure.
Honeybz-you really need to read the email I sent to SD17-it's on
"To Thine Own Self Be True" William Shakesphere
Steptalk-a day or so ago. And today I posted my preface to H, who I also forwarded a copy of the email too.
Like you, I waited and waited for H to address the problems of SD17. It's taken me getting to the point where I don't give a damn if H leaves over me standing up for myself, and demanding what is rightfully mine (respect in my own home)from his pond scum spawn. He never would do anything about her. Oh he had his talks with her too. It was honey this babe that blah blah blah. Never a firm you will not, we will not allow, you are way out of line.
So I did it. And it felt (feels) wonderful. What's going to feel even better is knowing that the next time H is here (if there is a next time)-he can go see her. She is not welcome in my home.