Pick up/Drop off issues. Anyone Else?

I don't know if this is going to be an ongoing problem or not yet. H picks up SD and drops off at the same time EOW...6pm. If drop offs need to be early he will call BM and make sure it is ok. Every Friday she will call between 4-6 times while he is on the way to see what landmark he is at. It takes anywhere between 1 1/2- 2 hours each way to get there. I don't know why he even answers the phone, but he does most of the time. We always get a call Sunday morning to see when we will be dropping her off. Same conversation... 6pm. I feel like the movie Groundhog Day. About 2 months ago H went to pick her up at 6pm and SD wasn't there. She sent her off with her Aunt because she was bothering BF and he couldn't get any work done. She was in another town 25 minutes away. H told her that he was leaving and she would have to make the trip to our house to drop her off. She wasn't having that even though it was her fault SD wasn't there when she was suppose to be. H ended up waiting an hour for her to get there because he missed her and didn't want to a weekend without seeing her. Now it happened again yesterday. BM called at 3pm to see when he would be dropping off...6pm. She said ok. H gets there at 6pm and BM isn't even home! He goes up to BF's work and she isn't there either. He calls her and her cell is turned off. Thankfully SD knew her Aunt's phone number and she came to pick her up within 5 minutes. WTF!!! How could BM be so irresponsible? H finally talked to her today and get this, she was tubing down the river and that's why she wasn't home. It took longer that what she expected. No call or nothing! Don't know why she didn't call on her way back. I'm not sure anything can even be done about this. If we wanted to spend $$ we could probably take her to court for contempt but would it be worth it? I'm hoping if this continues next year when we go back for review we can get orders changed to meeting in the middle.

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DH's order states..

that at the beginning of each parent's parenting time, that parent picks up the children from the other parent.

I would definitely bring this up at your review. There is no logical reason that one parent should contribute 100% of the transportation.

"For every ailment under the sun....There is a remedy, or there is none;
If there be one, try to find it; If there be none, never mind it." ~ W.W. Bartley

We've had problems too

I think everyone has a story about pick up/drop off problems. We've had a couple different problems. BM used to have a habit of calling to try to talk to me immediately after BF picked up or dropped off SS, so we would have 5 or so messages on the machine that said, "Nymh? NYMH! I know you're there. Are you too stupid to answer the phone?! You better stay away from MYYYY son this weekend!" or "I TOLD YOU to STAY AWAY from MYYYY son!!! You have BF every day, why can't you stay away from him long enough for him to visit with MYYY son?!?!?!"

Then she started waiting until about 10 minutes before BF was supposed to be there to pick up SS to call and say that SS wasn't feeling well and didn't want to come to visitation. It takes 45 minutes to get to her house from our town, and if we're at home when BF leaves it takes over an hour to get there. Yet she would always wait until 5:45 or 5:50 to call and say that SS wouldn't be coming when pick up is at 6:00. Then when SS showed up she'd say, "I called you but you never answer my calls..." BF has had to call the police on two occasions because she would try to keep SS from him at the pick up. And it seems we're starting this trend again because SS wasn't here for his last visitation because he "had a sore throat."

*~So sayeth Nymh~*

DH needs to put his foot down

if u have papers they should explain pickup/dropoff times. so theres no need for her to call. he needs to stop answering and tell her that theres no need for contact...and dont deviate from the schedule! if he goe sto pick up SD and shes not there, have yr papers handy and call the police. they dont like to get involved but will assist and then u have documentation of her withholding visitation.

not a problem , as long as..

we take skids too and from directly to BM's home. She convienently has car issues, health issues, BF issues, etc. SHe has used every excuse so she doesnt have to spend money and/or get off her fat @$$. Once she offered to watch skids when there was no school, BF took them down there in morning..had to ring doorbell/phone for 1/2 hour to wake up her lazy butt!!!

I totally agree

I don't think it is fair for us to contribute 100% of transportation either. It seems that non-custodial parents get screwed in every way. We spend between $180-$225 a month just on gas to get SD. That is on top of CS, health insurance premiums, half of medical and providing a wardrobe for our house. And all BM has to do is sit on her @SS. I know there is no reason for contact other that BM wanting to have control. I do make H carry papers in his car just in case he needs them. I have told him to call the police, but doesn't want to take it to that extreme. I told them all they will do is document that she is withholding visitation and that way we have it on record (other than us writing it down). He avoids conflict at all times and that is his biggest problem in dealing with BM. He needs to grow a new pair!

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