I want to Run away and never see these kids ever again in my life!
I feel like, running from the situation. I have been with my husband now for 5 years and things do not get easier.... My husband just bought his son an IPhone 6 because it was the same price as the 5 but this 16 y/o male, doesn't have good grades, barely speaks to me, I have to be on him when it comes to his ONCE per week chore of doing the kitchen, he gets suspended from school all the time, even beat up his bio mom when she tried to discipline him.
I am beyond done with him and really thinking about walking away bc I can't stand the site of looking at him. My step daughter is just a big baby, that acts like she is 5 when she just turned 13 just to play her dad. They know exactly how to play their cards and he doesn't see it at all.
My twins (15y/o b and g) are well mannered, not perfect but stellar students, involved in the community etc....
I see right through them and I am just so outdone. Feel like it never goes away. I can't stand the sight of them ( as I prepare myself to have them at MY house this evening).
I know I sound evil but I can assure you that I am not.... I wish I would have never gotten myself in this relationship. I just can't sugar coat this anymore, I cannot STAND them at all... makes my husband look so freaking weak and like a pussy when he is with them or when they are around.... I live for the days they are not with us.
HELP!!!!
No way in hell would my SS be
No way in hell would my SS be in my home if he beat up his BM. If he will do it to her, what stops him from doing it to you?
and that is exactly what i
and that is exactly what i said to his dad... but all he did was whoop his *** ( as a "punishment) and it has done nothing to him. Don't get me wrong his mother is a nut case who used to make my life miserable but I actually did feel bad for her to go through that bc NO kid should EVER do that to a parent.
My husband acts as though he can handle him even though his son is an ****ole to everyone and acts as though he is better than all of us, yet he can barely read and all he does is be on his phone.
It is sicking.... talking about it makes me feel a bit better. Last night I told my husband that we will be in a "normal" marriage in 2 years when his son is gone from OUR lives and then 3 years after that when his daughter is then gone as well....
Sad but true!
I told my SO a few months ago
I told my SO a few months ago that if either of his kids laid a hand on me I would call the cops. (In response to reading about a steptalk SM getting hit by her SD) He said "Well, don't hit them". I don't hit his kids, ever. So his counter response to me saying I'll call the cops was absurd.
Oh best believe that I told
Oh best believe that I told my dh that if that was to ever happen in MY house anything in that line, the cops would be called and I WOULD be pressing charges. I was pressing him to let BM press charges bc as far as I see it, he will now be a woman beater bc nothing was done about this other than my DH whopping his ass....
Problem is these Guilty
Problem is these Guilty Daddies tend to have kids who fail to launch.
Too funny
Too funny
Don't be sorry, I hate to say
Don't be sorry, I hate to say it but my husband is acting like a sorry person. He grew up to a dad and mom that totally took take of him but did not let him slip and i think after his divorce he turned into a pussy out of guilt. But as I see it, nothing will change. Once he gets in trouble, my DH will take his phone away and every time he is at our house he will be with yet ANOTHER attitude and begging for his phone. I am just so mentally tired...
I have now developed LUPUS ( I guess I've had it but the stress of all of this has made it flare up), so I am physically and mentally done. I am a bitch 24/7 towards him and his kids and I hate living this way....
BTW, I was LOL to your comment... thanks I really needed that!
Thanks so much for your
Thanks so much for your comment. It feels good to know that there's people whom i haven't met yet they understand my feelings. I do need to take care of myself and put me first bc I'm def not doing well with my health. I just saw my ss earlier and it's almost as though i get this sick feeling seeing him and i hate having him here. Just hate it. I'm currently barricaded in my room.
I know how you feel about
I know how you feel about wanting to run away from this situation but, this 16yo male that lives in your house should respect you and your home. He is old enough to get a job and pay for the things he wants and have them handed to him. As far as his BM and him hitting her, I would not stand for it because his behavior is a reflection of the way you and husband are raising the children in your home and if he wants to think he is a man by putting his hands on a woman then put him out in the street and let him see how hard life is without a mom or anyone for that matter.
He just so lazy. Everything
He just so lazy. Everything has to be told to him 100 times, do you know, my husband still wakes him and his 13 y/o up every morning for school? Is embarrassing for me to see that.
I've told my husband over and over again how this is just ridiculous but still nothing. He is not blatantly disrespectful, is just that attitude and the tone but today i told myself that if from here on out i hear any type of tone or attitude,i will go off. And i almost can't Wait for it to happen. I just don't want to be around them, i know that's terrible. Lol....
My SD has missed her bus
My SD has missed her bus about 5 times within the last month and her school is way on the other end of town so guess who has to get up and wake her up and take her to school. I have to make her set her alarm clock every night... she's 14 she should be doing this on her own. And don't get me started on her attitude or how she treats my 7 year old daughter. I'm just waiting on the day when her dad finally sees how manipulating this child really is and puts her in her place.
Wow.... that's terrible. My
Wow.... that's terrible. My bd and bs have been getting up for school by themselves since they were prob 8 y/o. So sorry you're going through this as well.
I love love love your advice.
I love love love your advice. I will be doing this or at least try this weekend. I have said this before and haven't really follow through. So this time i will. My health is declining and I'm not about to let them make it worst. Thank God for my bk bc they're truly amazing.
Btw...to answer your question
Btw...to answer your question about if I still love my dh, to be honest i think i do but we have been Having so many issues about this for so many years that i have soooo much resentment and I'm so turned off by how weak he is with them that at times i wonder whether I'd be better off without him.
Read it and is eye
Read it and is eye opening.... Happy this has worked out for you. The situation is sad but as long as it works out for you.
Although this didn't happen
Although this didn't happen to me, it happened to his BM, I sometimes wished it did bc that would mean that i would have an excuse to never have him in my life again. I fantasized with the day they will disappear from my life.
I think thoughts like that,
I think thoughts like that, too. The SDs do something not SO terrible, but bad, and DH enables them. Gives them a free pass. If it was something blatantly bad, then it would be easier to kick OSD19 permanently out of my home. I don't want t see the bitch.
~ Moon
I have nerve been so
I have nerve been so grateful for a website before in my life. But this one makes me see that there is a bigger problem on our hands that being the dh enabling these little demons.
My story exactly. So many of
My story exactly. So many of us are married to men that can't be men...
Thanks... this is a very true
Thanks... this is a very true statement. Sad but very true!
Please disengage for your own
Please disengage for your own health. I did almost two years ago. I don't speak to SD 17 or do anything for her.
I walk a lot, and do yoga. I've also taken up a hobby. I work 44 hours a week. Keeping busy keeps me sane, and not focusing on SD's behavior, and lack of hygiene. The one thing I won't keep quiet about is her smell. When the fumes start coming downstairs, I tell DH to do something about it. Summer is coming, and that's when it gets nasty.
I love my DH, but he can't parent. He's more interested in being her pal, and keeping her happy. He wouldn't dream of raising his voice to her. When he wants her to do something, he has to make sure he smiles, and makes light of it. She knows she has him wrapped around her finger.
She has broken things in her fits of rage. She stays away from me, but I would not hesitate to call the police if she ever dared to hurt me. When DH and her get into an argument, I try to make sure I see what's going on, so I can be a witness. She has threatened to call the police on her dad before, claiming he hit her...which he never has or ever will. Needless to say, lying is one of the things she excels in.
It is a life of hell, but since disengaging, I'm happier. Just hoping she launches some day.
Disengagement is in the
Disengagement is in the works, I say what needs to be done and try to stay away from them. it's easier in the summer bc my kids go away to their dad's floor 3 weeks and that's when I spring into non action and stay the hell away do NOTHING for them. Thanks for your advice
Disengagement is in the
Disengagement is in the works, I say what needs to be done and try to stay away from them. it's easier in the summer bc my kids go away to their dad's floor 3 weeks and that's when I spring into non action and stay the hell away do NOTHING for them. Thanks for your advice
A violent teen would never
A violent teen would never darken the threshold of my home twice even if it was my bio spawn much less someone else's including my SOs.
Inform your DH that his son is no longer welcome in your home for any reason ever. Period. He physically assaulted his mom .. .why is he not in jail?
If DH makes the mistake of allowing SS-16 in your home call 911 and tell them you feel unsafe and let the officers in uniform haul him off in cuffs. Each and every time the violent POS shows up, he gets arrested. Period!
As for SD-13/5. If she shows up pack your twins up and head to a hotel and an amusement park for the weekend. No need to tolerate toxic POS kids in your home even if they are your DH's spawn.
If my brother or I had even acted aggressively towards our mom after we woke up from a caste iron frying pan to the skull our USMC dad would have beaten us to within an inch of our lives and maybe beyond for even thinking of raising a hand to his wife/our mom.
Time to take the consequences of your two Skid's actions out of your obviously complete failure as a father DH and bring the pain down on all three of them.
I would were I you.
Good luck.