I'm Too Nice, Sooooo.........
Before Christmas I told DH how crazy it was that SD13 couldn't remember to brush her teeth, take a shower and take her allergy pill. I went off on him about HIM parenting SD13 himself and making sure she did the minimum around here - clean your ass and brush your face on a regular basis. The rule (made by me) was to shower every Sunday, Tuesday and Thursday. Friday and Saturday as needed. It's been working for a few weeks now, because I have helped remind him to remind SD13. It grosses me out to be at the dinner table with geeky, cheesy SD13, so I don't make dinner except for maybe once a week now.
What night is it folks? SD13 showered on Sunday. It's 8:15pm and SD13 has to be in bed at 9pm. It's way to late for a shower. Plus, if she goes to bed with her short boy hair all wet, she wakes up looking like a rooster. Nope, it's too difficult to dry your hair with a towel, just leave it soaking wet so it's still wet when you go to bed and mash your head into the pillow.
Is there a full moon tonight? Let's see how my "experiment" goes. I bet nothing will happen. No shower. Ewwww. DH is unwinding from work, watching TV, he won't remember.
SD13 certainly won't remember on her own.
Small update on me....I've been off Lyrica for FM since right before Thanksgiving. Started low-dose Xanax to help relax my damaged shoulders and neck. I tried this on my own at the new year with an old Rx, then called my doc and got more Xanax. I actually spun around at work today without losing my balance. I even drove over the speed limit on the way home at the end of a long day during tax season (lots of sensory perception problems leading to balance issues, even while seated and driving...). I have lost 9 pounds as well.
So, I am feeling stronger and getting my groove back. Hell hath no fury an SM scorned. I was weak before. Now I am REALLY ready to go get 'em! 
~ Moon
First up - EWWWWWW!! SD is a
First up - EWWWWWW!! SD is a growing girl turning into a woman - she should be very, very aware of her personal hygiene..!
However, I don't think this should be your problem - it's DH's and he needs to step up and parent her.
Regarding your new found energy - that is damned AWESOME!! Use it for YOU!!!
Keep your groove by disengaging from the stench of SD and let DH handle his..um...shit.
Congrats on feeling so much
Congrats on feeling so much better.
It WAS a full moon last
It WAS a full moon last night. SD13 doesn't stink but her hair gets greasy and she has braces. I'm eating in my room tonight!
~ Moon <----FULL TOO!
I gave up on the
I gave up on the bathing/brush teeth/brush hair/use no TP/wash face/change or wear underwear/change or wear socks about a month ago with SD11. I throw away underwear on a regular basis. SD11 is getting dandruff from having such dirty hair and asked me to buy her some dandruff shampoo. Instead I talked with her about first washing/brushing hair more than once a week (again) and only then if she still needs it will we get some. I warned DP that his DD will be schooled by her friends and not us about her hygiene - and I stopped worrying about it.
SD9 is now starting the same habits as her sister. DP noticed this and is concerned. Finally. But he's still lax about it unless I point it out. I do, but in private, never with the girls present. He can do it himself.
Remember that SD13 declared
Remember that SD13 declared that she wanted to be a boy at the start of the school year, last August. I had had it with her faking showers and not brushing her teeth last spring when she was 12. She would get in the shower but not wash her waist-length hair. I called her out on it and shut her down. I took all of her electronics to work with me for 2 weeks. DH backed me up. DH and I usually see eye to eye on things like hygiene and helping around the house etc. The problem with DH is that he never notices the lack of shower. Or not brushing teeth on weekend mornings until afternoon, when I remind him. I have had SD13 and OSD19 FT for 2 years since BM died. I struggle with trying to do the right thing and trying to guide SD13 with how to be a responsible kid. The struggle is because DH doesn't put forth as much effort as he should. He's a man, it doesn't matter to him like it does to a woman.
So, the big question......Did SD13 shower last night or this morning? Last night No, this morning doubtful. Guess who is working late tonight and won't be home until after I'm in bed? DH! So he won't be here to see greasy head SD13. I ate dinner in my room and I'm enjoying my "apartment" living lol.
I have my four beautiful dogs in here with me and things are good. I spun around at work today, showing my friends how much better my balance is! I am so excited about feeling stronger!! It has been horrible not being able to walk without feeling like I am going to tip over, shuffling around all of the time. It's been this way for close to 5 years.
I am feeling freeeeee! But staying quiet on the shower thing. SD13 wanted to get her hair cut this past weekend, and I made sure I didn't remind DH. SD13 and DH forgot, too. If the topic comes up again, I am going to ask why DH should pay for SD13's haircut if she can't even bother to remember basic hygiene? I wonder what the kids at school think of the hair. Short cut that has grown in way too much, dirty greasy hair, but no BO. Thank goodness, no BO!
~ Moon Still FULL
Better than DP and SD11 not
Better than DP and SD11 not able to take care of basic hygiene let alone a haircut...DP told SD11 she could get ears pierced at the end of the summer before Middle school starts. He says it was with the understanding her hygiene would improve but with no parameters. I just laughed! I'm like, good luck showing her how to take care of her ears and replace her lost earrings. I anticipate a trip to the doctor to treat infected ears for him. She can't even use t.p. or put a band aid on herself. How is she going to clean possibly painful new earring holes??
I had a Chicken Pot Pie and
I had a Chicken Pot Pie and it was glorious!! LMAO
(I don't drink.)
I asked SD13 if she had
I asked SD13 if she had showered in the morning this week. Nooooo.......I asked her right in front of DH last night when he got home. She keeps asking for things and wants a haircut and wants this and that.......so, I figured she is not DUE anything until she shows some responsibility. I told her I knew when her last shower was, but did she? "Uhhhhhhhhm.......Suuunnnn-daaayyyyyy?" Yes, it was Sunday, during the coin toss for the Super Bowl. I told her to look at DH and say it again, LOUDER this time! DH couldn't believe it! He was really surprised. I told SD13 how good her greasy head of hair looked. I also told her she wasn't getting her hair cut for two more weeks. Her eyes went wide and her jaw dropped. She wanted a hair cut last weekend because her boy cut is getting very long. DH started saying, "But I told her I would take her......." I shut him down. I said to SD13, "Why should we take you to get your hair cut when you don't even wash it and take care of it?" "Uhhhhhh, because it's long?" All stupid and cutesy sounding. I said, "No, I don't care if it's long, you don't deserve a haircut because you don't even shower and wash your hair. Wear a HAT then!" SD13 said, "We're not allowed to wear hats at school!" Oh well.
Next time I am going to let her go to school looking like a greased pig. I only said something because it was grossing me out, DH didn't notice and they had somewhere to go to tonight. I later told DH in private NOT to take her to get her hair cut for two weeks. He made excuses and I told him to quit enabling her and to STFU. I reminded him how I yelled at the two of them the first week of December about SD13's hygiene, and the only reason she has showered since then is because I have reminded DH to remind SD13 every Sunday Tuesday and Thursday to shower. Until this week. Ugh. Maybe I could give her a choice of no haircut or no screen time for two weeks? LOL I told DH he's not teaching her shit by not giving consequences.
DH had the nerve to ask ME why I just didn't remind her? I said I had been doing it for 2 months and she is 13 for goodness sake! If we don't push play with SD13, she doesn't DO anything. Next time I'll shut up. I won't join them for dinner, I won't remind, I won't do anything. It will be my excuse to stay in my room because SD13 is just gross and clueless! Ewwwww.
~ Moon
I spoke to DH again today and
I spoke to DH again today and asked if he had talked to SD13. I asked how she responded. He said she kinda said, "Ok....." which leads me to believe she didn't think much of it.
I told DH that SD13 doesn't think it MATTERS that she doesn't shower on her own. I told him that was HIS fault, for down-playing everything and not giving consequences. I reminded him NOT to take her to get her hair cut. He thought that was being too excessive. I said, "There! You make it seem like nothing matters! You enable her and she always ends up getting what she wants. She needs consequences!" He proceeded to tell me I'm all about rules. I said "Why yes, I am, and how hard is it to shower? All she does is PLAY every night. (Not like she studies or anything.) We ("I") only make her do it every other day!" I reminded him how I went off on the two of them in early December about this very subject. Third strike and you're out. I told him I would take all of her shit from her to wake her ass up.
Now DH wants ME to take SD13 to HS registration next week when he is out of town. He says he needs my help with certain things. I asked when HE was going to get on board with the showers? I told him that SD13 grosses me out with the lack of hygiene and I am starting to not want to be around her. I told him I don't like feeling that way about her, but I do. I resent that I feel that way.
SD13 is going to have enough trouble being a "boy" in HS. The least she could do is shower so the kids don't have something else to tease her about.
~ Moon
My point exactly. He will be
My point exactly. He will be out of town and already called the middle school a week ago saying neither one of us would be available. They told him the HS sends paperwork to the MS for kids who don't make it to registration. I told him I could "try" to make it but I don't like being guilted into this position.
Ugh, he's an idiot.
~ Moon