I burn my skids underwear, don't even attempt to wash them anymore. My kids at least wash pits and privates every day, we use wet wipes for the bathroom. When they soil them, they immediately tell me, wet wipe and change pants. DH dared question me the other day why I give my kids a bath or shower everyday, I ignored it. I tried for years to show skids proper hygiene, but if they see their BM wash once a month and just pile on the gross body spray, what can I expect?

Ewwwwww! I agree that a bath isn't necessary every day although I don't think my BS missed many days. But not changing underwear, never acceptable and definitely not healthy. We had the same problem with SD. BM had told the skids they didn't have to change their jeans every day-they could wear them a couple days. Apparently she never explained that they should change their underwear everyday. DH was lax on this at the time. I was still involved so I set them straight. I made it very clear that they are to change their underwear every day, no exceptions. Not happening in my house.

I'm not sure if you will have any luck getting him to change when he's at BM's. Just keep telling him that he should be changing everyday and hopefully he will learn on his own.

Not much you can do when he's at BM's. Put him through a car wash when you pick him up.

My feeling is once they hit puberty, it should be pretty regular so they don't stink, but before that, we do it on an "as needed basis." I think it really depends. Europeans certainly don't bathe on a daily basis, and frankly unless you're dealing with a massive sweat gland issue, my guess is most people don't really NEED to bathe daily. My XH told DS6 that he needs to bathe every day. I told him he doesn't need to every day. I mean WTF XH, are you trying to run up my water bill while simultaneously giving our son eczema? DD, DS and I have sensitive skin, so washing with soap every day is very irritating. Honestly, as long as the kids don't look like they were pulled from a dumpster, and you can't sense their presence through your nose, then I'd say conserve your water bill. It's better for the environment anyway.

For whatever reason, S12 HATES to bathe. Probably showers 1-3 times a week and he's on the go a lot, so he's always dirty. He was so filthy one time, his SKIN looked like desert camouflage. Disgusting. I mentioned it to DH, he looked at the skid's neck and said "Go take a shower." The shoulders dropped, the lip came out and the whining started. DH said "I didn't ask you. I'm telling you. GO NOW!!"

S12's underwear is often a reflection of his lack of bathing. DH got a hamper for the skids. Thank goodness! Half the time, S12's underwear has so many skid marks, so thick, they look like mud. These go into a small garbage bag and into the outside trash. BTW, I also have a special pair of rubber gloves that are used only for handling dirty skid laundry.

When I had an SD the same thing happened. I realized that her mom thought she new better, because she HAD taught her to change them everyday, and she was just lazy. It's one of those things...some kids want to do what they want to do when and how they want to do it. It's something they can control and their little secret if they are disobeying.

Now...with my own kids...my 13boy bathes almost everyday at this point because he's a grease pot. My girl11 has literally gone a week without bathing and you couldn't even tell. She has also gone without changing her underwear even though *I* taught her to do this. At some point, you stop checking underwear because you know they know...

Back when my daughter was 3-7yrs she would get UTIs ALLLLLLL the time, even though she was wearing clean underwear and bathing regularly (had to switch to showers). In the last couple of years when she has chosen not to shower regularly, not changed her underwear, etc. she has not gotten any UTIs. I say that just to say even kids who are susceptible to this issue are fine without bathing! Now, if a kid stinks, that is another issue. My daughter will bathe now when she feels gross. She has never been stinky.

If a kid is digging in his pants, he needs to be reminded that it's weird (one) and (two) all he has to do to prevent it is clean his butt better and change his underwear! If he is 5, he may need a wet wipe to finish the job. Baby wipes work great. We use them all the time at my house. I don't understand why everyone doesn't. So unless he enjoys having dingleberries irritate him during football, he will correct his behavior eventually. Some of us have to learn the hard way.

We definitely emphasize cleanliness, but no one in our house takes a shower or bath every night. After sports, yes, for sure.

But bathing too much is actually not good for your skin or hair. If we've been sedentary, we bathe about once every two or three days, adding showers on days that we run or do sports.

I see some people said every other day for different reasons however if this kid can't wipe his ass properly he needs a good bath at night. Not getting a bath or fresh underwear for FOUR days sounds like neglect to me. If I was you, I would give child services a call and tell them what you are finding and if their is anything they can do? Home visit at BM? Surely BM washes her ass more than once a week so she needs to be taking care of this little boy better than that.