All the time. Each lame ass move by BM, each scream of emergency drama, each instance when BM cannot parent her children and she turns to my DH to "fix it" I am embarrassed for him. This past weekend while hearing another parenting gem from SS11 about BM being so cool, after SS11 went to watch his tv, DH turned to me and said, BM is trash. DH saying that is so true but it's hard to even imagine that this was a woman he married and had two kids with. I stopped asking why, I really don't want to know. Young, dumb and full of... :? :? :?

my dh says it's because she didn't show him her true self. she was nice to him. he fell for it. omg seriously?

I tease my fiance about this all the time. He has married/procreated with the bottom feeders in our area. The craziest of the crazies...To his credit, each one has been a step above the last. I often tell him to just imagine how awesome his NEXT wife will be if she's a step above me (me being the most sane of the crazies).

Yep.

OSS20 - didn't graduate, spent his 18th and 19th years in juvie. Refused to get his GED and who knows if he is working or not now.
YSS14 - he has sever anger, emotional issues and is in a treatment center. He was supposed to get out in July but he had some bad marks. When he didn't get out, he went nuts...ran away at 2am, spitting on workers, refusing his meds. So this child who is off the charts intelligent will not amount to much in the near future.
SD13 - She likes school and isn't bad YET. Eventually, she will want the fun and lay on her ass all day life like her BM and brothers.

Sadly, DSO takes more pride in my kids than his own.

I am SOOO embarrassed for DH. I really feel bad for him. The situation is complicated and long so I won't go into it. But, it's WAY beyond embarrassing.

I'm embarrassed that I even married mine.

I was at my very old school grandmothers house today she's catholic and doesn't believe in divorce, etc. Anyway I was explaining to her our situation today and I realized how very embarrassed I am. FDH is a good man, he truly it but he looks TERRIBLE on paper. My family is very judgmental unfortunately and this has caused a lot of rifts with me and certain members but I am happy and his family accepted my children and I with open arms so what can I do? It's their loss, but yes I am constantly embarrassed that she will forever be part of our lives and he even had a relationship with her.

I wonder if anyone has considered what effect a divorce and step-parent has had on these kids? The best step-parent who in their eyes is replacing their Mom, took their Dad away, etc., can really mess up a kid. It's not the step-parents fault, just being there is the problem.

If I had to do it over again I would not marry or shack up until the kids were grown.

"my dh says it's because she didn't show him her true self. she was nice to him. he fell for it. omg seriously"? 'momagainfor4'

Until you've been suckered in you have no idea how well these crazies can act normally to the public and you. I personally believe they want to be normal, have worked hard at being normal, want a normal life, but without outside help and their own honesty their true mental state can't help but break out. Especially at times of stress. Divorce and re-marriage of the ex are the perfect times. Walk in my shoes 'mom for 4'.