Cat....I would love to bring my baby back home. I have already talked to an attorney and they informed me that if I were to take the baby without my husbands consent it would be considered kidnapping. I do have a job and my own income but my husband does not want to have separate accounts. I tried this once and he went crazy. I am not sure how to bring up that I want to move forward with a divorce? He is very verbally abusive but has never touched me. The attorney I spoke to said that it is his words against mine. My husband said that if I were to file for divorce...he would say I am mean to his children and that I have problems with alcohol etc. I am not sure what to do? I do not want to give him 50 % custody as the attorney told me he would likely get. I feel like I am trapped!

Thank you all for your comments. I have a diary where I have been documenting a lot of what happened back when I tried leaving him the first time. It is very detailed. I also have a note that he wrote when I tried leaving him last time that says that he wants to kill himself. I have this in a safe place. I have never laid a hand on his kids and I have never said anything mean or bad to them. I have never said anything bad about the ex wife either to the children. My husband has never hit me or touched me. When he can't control himself he starts yelling, cussing, slams doors, hitting himself and and finally takes off for hours or even 1-2 days. I have a safe house (my neighbors, older couple) where I can go should I need to. They are fully aware of what is going on. My husband says that he wants to see the baby every day. It is really heart breaking to see your child happy to see their dad when he comes home from work but he says he is tired, needs a break etc so the baby has to wait to get a hello and kisses. This does not happen every day but several times a week. I would like to talk to him about what happened last time I tried to leave. He gets very angry should I try to bring it up. He says I should not bring up stuff that happened in the past. I feel like I can not communicate with him. Most stuff gets shoveled under the rug. I did set up a time to go talk to a professional and my neighborhood was with me. We were on our way to the appointment and my husband called furious as I had missed a couple of calls from him. He said he wanted to tag along. It was just to much so I cancelled that appointment. I think I need to set up a new one to get some moral support.

I can't seem to have a conversation about our problems with my husband. Today he slept all day until 6pm and left for work again at 8pm. He took the baby for maybe 15min. He did work night and did not go to bed until around 4am. I do not want to have a husband that sleeps all day and does nothing to help out with baby or household. I work nights too...as soon as the baby goes to bed...I work until at least 11pm. I have the baby from when she wakes up until she goes to bed at around 9pm. Don't take me wrong...I love being with my baby...I would not want it any other way but I do need some kind of help to be able to work the 30 hours per week I need to. My husband does not make enough for us to make it so I have to work. He has promised me that his kids were to come over today for a talk...but it never happened. I asked him about it and he got really upset. He said that he understands why they have been treating me the way they have as I tried leaving him 8 months ago and that is the reason for their behavior. He says that I am trying to put him down. That he needs to go to work and that I am not helping/supporting him. I only think about myself and I am mean to everyone else. He always try to push the bad things under the rug and I just need a way to get through to him. I feel hopeless. Why is it that we can't have a real conversation about how to move forward? Any suggestions on how to deal with a manipulative person would be appreciated!