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No really a surprise!

CantKeepDoingThis's picture

As I mentioned in another post...DH opened his big mouth around SD15 that he was getting a bonus, and since then, she has been coming up with all of this stuff she "needs". Here is the thing...DH NEEDS to get a tooth fixed...it is one that he had a cavity in in his early 20's when he didn't have money, and got a cheap dentist fix it...so naturally now, the whole tooth is deteriorating and he needs a crown. This is why this is of concern to me...if his blows all of this money he got on SD15, then he can't fix his tooth. Then one day, it will give, he will be in terrible pain, and need to take out a line of credit to fix, which I will end up having to help with the payments because he doesn't have enough income to cover another line of credit payment.

So today, she loses her phone (and you all know her history with electronics). She can't seem to remember at all where she made have left it! She starts to ask DH when he thinks he can get her a new one, as he calls the place we had lunch. Ha! Someone found her phone and turned it in! Poor princess...good try! Bad thing is, now DH has to go get the phone (and the place is 20 miles from the house)! Time, gas. He wanted to try to get it today, and I told him I wouldn't rush...maybe if she has to be without it a couple of days, she will start thinking about double checking she has her things before leaving someplace! It isn't like this is just a one-time thing! She lost her house key a few weeks ago and said nothing...even before that, she was always forgetting it at home and so I had to go let her in like every other day! She has lost 2 other phones and broken 2 other phones in the last 2 years. 2 broken tablets, a broken laptop, 3 pair of lost dance shoes...she is truly one of those that you can say, "If her head wasn't attached..."

No concern to her...dear daddy will just replace it! But things are a changin'! She better get used to it!

Orange County Ca's picture

Tell him if he fronts this dental money to her then needs a crown you'll help buy the twine to tie to the tooth and doorknob to pull it out but not one cent to make payments on a line of credit.

Stop all this credit buying. It's the interest that's a large part of the reason nobody has any money - it's all going to pay the interest. Don't make it about his kid make it about how much money is being lost by being in debt.

A $1000 loan paid over ten years costs $3000. Do you, does he, have the faintest idea of the percentage rate being paid on these loans?

CantKeepDoingThis's picture

Exactly! But you and I both know, it is more about the princess' happiness!

One of the things SD15 is asking for is this $60 dance costume for color guard captain tryout! With expedited shipping (as tryout is Friday), it will probably be closer to $100. Now, this is something that SD15 will wear for this one thing, and then she will never wear it again (the next time something like this comes up, she will want something new). This costume is NOT a requirement! The other girls are basically wearing the clothes they use for guard practice (black leggings...MAYBE some cute, float top the got cheap at Rue21 or something). SD15 claims she NEEDS this costume to show how committed she is in wanting to be captain! What, are you THAT afraid you can't make captain or any other officer on pure skill, talent, and character?

I'm still praying she doesn't make an officer! She does not have the leadership or people skills, and wants it for all the wrong reasons! Control of the squad?

CantKeepDoingThis's picture

Yup! Even with insurance, our part is still some $900 for the crown! Dental is freaking expensive? And SD15 cries about having a gap in her teeth and that she NEEDS braces? DH has real dental stuff he needs! BS19 has a wisdom tooth in danger of infection that must come out! Not paying for cosmetic dentistry when there are real needs!

Midwest Stepmom's picture

clearly she is not responsible for electronics. I would stop replacing them and stop buying new items as well.

CantKeepDoingThis's picture

EXACTLY!!! THANK YOU!!! I've told DH this! The last time she lost her phone, I told him not to spend the insurance deductible ($50) to get a new phone, as she was told the time before when she broke her phone that would be the last time! I pointed out that her phone is supposed to be so that we could get hold of her when needed, but she NEVER answers it when we call her or responds to texts...however, let one of her little friends call or text her, and she is all over it!

DH ended up driving all the way back to the eatery yesterday evening to get the phone. He was all stressing about it! I told him he shouldn't have gone to get it...he should have simply got it at his convenience on his way home from work some day this week, and let her do without her phone a few days...maybe the pain of not having her phone would make her think about checking if she has it before leaving someplace (as I did yesterday when we left the eatery, because I was in a dress and had my phone in my purse...which I'm not used to as I usually have it in my jeans pocket where I feel it...double checked to make sure it was in my purse before we left).

tabby yabba do's picture

SD12 broke her rhino-case on her iPhone this weekend. Phone was fine. But it brought up the conversation between DH and me of "How will we respond to SD12 or DD11 when they lose/break their smart phones?" We hatched out our game plan today so neither of us can disney-parent our respective kid if/when it happens (because I'm sure I'd have a moment where I'd want to "save" my DD11 too, so this keeps me fair and consistent!). Both SD12 and DD11 were advised of our pre-determined method of dealing with this situation.

And for the record, our plan is this: If/when smart phone is broken, kid goes back to their dumb phone until they save their own money for a replacement - which of course won't happen because the phone will be at retail cost since we don't buy insurance for our phones and upgrades are already used. First World Problems. Beee

CantKeepDoingThis's picture

I so wish DH would do this...I've tried to get him to so many times!! When SD15 lived with BM, every weekend it would be something different. He would get this call after dropping off SD15 that she forgot this homework or that book at our house, and if he didn't drive all the way back out to BM's with it that night, SD15 would be in trouble with her teacher in the morning! I was like, "Let her get in trouble! Maybe she will learn to attach her brain!" One or two times, sure...but this happened all the time!!! Even now that the living situation is the other way around...DH still often hears from SD15, "I left _______ at my mom's, and I NEED it!" He runs to get it! Doesn't teach SD15 anything other than DH is her personal slave and puppet! Then I have to listen to him grumble about it...you know what, then don't jump! Tell the princes to deal with it!! Maybe she will learn to get her crap together!

Right now I'm dying! Access to grades online are down while they are processing report cards. When I looked a few days ago, SD15 was still failing Algebra! I never said anything about it to DH...figured he should be looking himself like I'm watching BS19's grades. I know it is mean, but I'm HOPING she didn't pull her grade out...too preoccupied with her boyfriend and color guard. I would love for her to have a failing grade...I know it's terrible, but maybe it will wake up DH a bit! Her grades have dropped, but as long as she manages to keep them barely passing, DH ignores it. It is unlikely for him to ignore failing grades.