Is my bf cheating on me?

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I have been with my bf who has 5 kids (every other weekend), for about a year now. We have had a serious relationship and just recently I went home to visit my family in another state. I was gone for about 3 weeks. A few days after I came back, I noticed a strange email account was opened on our computer. I went to it, and noticed thousands of emails in the inbox about sex (very horrible kinds, some even seemed illegal) I went to the sent folder and saw an email that was sent on the day I left.

It was a response to a personal ad on craigslist for sex with a pregnant woman. It had his photo there and he said he wanted to get with them, and even gave his name.

Anyway, I confronted him about it calmly, and he says he doesn't know how it got there and someone must have hacked into his account. I ran the ip of the email itself, and it routed to the city we live in. He said it could have been anyone in our apt complex that uses the wifi here that could have been messing with him.

I have studied body language and when he said he didn't do it, he shakes his head yes. I pointed this out and he got extremely angry telling me I need to either believe him or leave. He has broken my heart but he won't tell me the truth. I have no physical evidence and part of me wants to believe him.

He has always been extremely hypersexual which has always concerned me. Doesn't like to kiss, angers easily and had posted a ton of bisexual craigslist ads before I met him which he told me were all just a joke.

He thinks very highly of himself and says he always gets what he wants. He tells me he loves me but I don't feel like he does at all. He doesn't have a car, bank account or drivers license (I drive him to and from work and he uses my account to deposit his checks.)

I am so sad right now and so confused. He tells me he did not do it and that he would never cheat on me. But, my gut is in turmoil....I am severely depressed right now. Please help.

There are so many red flags

There are so many red flags in your post that I don't even know where to begin. Oh wait, yes I do. Get out of this toxic relationship asap and get yourself tested for STDs.

Absolutely NONE of the information you gave about your b/f is normal behavior.

Oh, the 'ol "it was a joke."

Your gut is telling you a lot of things. I would listen.

Is that common? For guys to

Is that common? For guys to say something was a joke when it really wasn't?

When they are trying to make

When they are trying to make you out to be the crazy one, yes they do say that.

Yes, when they get caught.

I've thought the same thing

I've thought the same thing about him being a sociopath. He can be the sweetest person and then turn on a dime when angered. I feel like he's discarding me.

I have an ex who sounds just

I have an ex who sounds just like this guy, only he had a job and a car, he was always trying to sabotage me in some way to leave me jobless and carless, which is exactly how he wanted me. he was an unmedicated bipolar narcissist. he was abusive. he was a bastard. you need to leave. your gut doesn't lie to you, but a narcissist will lie to you with a smile on their face and never feel an ounce of guilt about it.

You need to leave. You are

You need to leave. You are supporting him and he has this kind of stuff in his past? Your gut is telling you this is off. Believe it and find someone who deserves you. 5 Kids would make me run regardless of the other crap. No car, no bank account? Really? What the hell is he hiding?

I know, right? Five kids? I'd

I know, right? Five kids? I'd rather have the STD.

He's cheating. I'm sorry to

He's cheating. I'm sorry to say.

you lost me at "he has 5

you lost me at "he has 5 kids..."

^^^This. I was obviously

^^^This. I was obviously kidding about preferring an STD over the 5 kids. He could kill you.

It wasn't a joke, no one is

It wasn't a joke, no one is messing with him. He got caught and is now lying through his teeth and doing a pretty bad job of it at that...

Yes, he's cheating on you. And of course he won't tell you the truth. You're his ride and his bank account. If he can snow you with this he can just continue doing whatever he wants. And anytime you get suspicious in the future he can get mad and cite this incident.

I know its hard to accept but

I know its hard to accept but you already have the truth. What more can you really ask for? Email accounts don't just create themselves, they don't open themselves and log in themselves and send emails themselves.
This is a toxic relationship and you need to leave now.

Besides the email stuff, he just sounds like a deadbeat who is using you. You can do sooooo much better than this guy.

Thank you so much....I don't

Thank you so much....I don't think I could have even dreamed of a more clear cut answer and explanation than this, it all makes perfect sense.

I can't add any more to what

I can't add any more to what Echo, Sueu2, Just Wow and the others have said.

Take everyone's advice here. As hard as it will be to end this relationship, 5 kids, craiglsist postings and the rest are going to be even worse for you in the end.

Please extract yourself from this situation as quickly as possible. Please come back here for support.

Furthermore....do not have sex with this person again and please get checked for STD's now and in six months.

Good luck and please keep us posted.

Duck...Duck....walks like a

Duck...Duck....walks like a duck...talks like a duck.....What possibly more could anyone tell you here.....other than Yes, he is. Now you have to decide what you are going to do about it for yourself. (Get the F* out would be my opinion on that befor you become baby mama of number #6)

Of course he loves you.

Of course he loves you. You're his driver and banker. Bet you help with the 5 kids, and you're the responsible one in the house. And good in bed too. Right?

Honey, that's not love.

If you were my daughter or my sister, I'd be pulling up to your house right now to help you pack a bag and get out. Get out NOW.

It is obvious that he is

It is obvious that he is lying. You have all the evidence you need. You need to move on. If you stay in this relationship you will have no one but yourself to blame because he has shown his true colors. I have seen women make excuses for men when they found out they were cheating because they didn't want to believe it. I had a friend who dated a guy whose handle on a dating website was "onedreamer." She found another profile called "twodreamer" that had the same physical description, same ages of kids, and same birthdays. Obviously it was him with another profile and he was cheating on her. She convinced herself that it wasn't him. Your evidence is even more compelling finding that on your computer. Don't bury your head in the sand.

Please get out asap, this is

Please get out asap, this is one sick guy. And who knows how long its been going on, and I would get checked for stds. Who knows what he could have exposed you to...sorry but that is the awful reality. A friend of mine years ago found out her husband was on all kinds of sites. It was pretty bad, and a lady even called her because he stupidly gave her the house phone by mistake. Dumb-A.

Off the subject but we just had a friend last year, that died of throat cancer. Yes it was the hpv kind, they test the cells so they know. He lived a pretty promiscuous life, and was only 43. Seriously, most people have no clue how dangerous sleeping around really is, they don't write those articles..even on Yahoo.

TRUST YOUR GUT. Your

TRUST YOUR GUT. Your instincts are there for a reason.

(Not very often that EVERY post says the same thing. He is a cheating piece of shit and you are better without someone like that.)

I read a story about a woman

I read a story about a woman who had all of these things happen to her and it took her husband being arrested for soliciting gay sex for her to finally believe he was cheating. Turns out he had HIV and now, so does she.

Anyway..whether he tells you or not, you saw it for your self. Why would anyone "hack into" his stuff to try and set him up? Also, even if he didn't actually have sex he certainly intended to.

Lose him, and, get yourself tested asap.

I promise that he never stopped soliciting men on craigslist, and you saw for yourself what else he is up to.

Thanks everyone....I hadn't

Thanks everyone....I hadn't dated in years before I dated this guy. I was praying for the right one to come along and I really thought he was the one. He told me everything I ever wanted to hear and is a very good conversationist. I should have known better though...even though he told me as well that he had been praying for the right one to come along, his actions do not show that he is with me because of love.

I have made so many mistakes and I am so scared. I have no one where I am because I moved to the state that he's in. I have money coming in soon that he wants me to spend on furniture, but I am going to use it to leave....but that won't come in for another 10 days. I am terribly frightened and so depressed. Please pray for me as I feel that I have no way out.

I will say a prayer for you.

I will say a prayer for you. Don't give up on men. There is a good one out there for you. Just pay attention to red flags in the beginning. If someone shows you who they are believe them. Go back in your mind and see if there were any clues to this type of behavior before you found the stuff on his computer. Those are the things you need to pay attention to when someone new comes along. With dating websites it is so easy to meet people these days and as soon as you see a red flag dump the guy and move on to the next until you meet someone who has no red flags. Always listen to your gut and never make excuses or blow things that bother you over.

I'm sorry you're going

I'm sorry you're going through all this. I once had very low self- esteem and was in a relationship with someone who although not this extreme, was cruel to me and I believe, unfaithful. I know how hard it can be to accept reality at these times, especially when you're vulnerable and feel you love someone. But listen to your gut. There's a reason that little voice inside is needling you about this.

From what you've posted about him here, and his past craigslists posts - yes, he probably has and is, cheating on you.

For your own good, please look into leaving this man. You can find someone who really loves you for you - he IS out there - but it seems your BF just isn't that man.

Your bf is right about

Your bf is right about someone being able to hack the computer and do whatever they want to on it. Know how I know? Because my own sociopath sex addict husband did it after (and probably before) we separated. This is not something normal people know because they don't think like that. The reason your boyfriend gave that excuse is because he's up to no good and he's probably hacking into your accounts and keeping an eye on everything you do. Mostly because he assumes you are cheating because he knows he is. And my ex was suspiciously interested in bisexual stuff as well. I hope you are able to get out quickly, and I would seek out counseling for yourself. I would like to say that people like these teach you to be more careful in the future, but it's not as easy as that. There is a reason you are a good target for sociopaths and you might need psych help to figure out why. Good luck!

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Is my bf cheating on me?