My DH gets resentful when my family (siblings) and I buy Christmas gifts for my sister's Skids. I've gone through this with my DH before. He feels my family didn't do the same for his daughters :?

Totally ridiculous because my family, like myself, have gone way over the top in the past with Christmas and birthday gifts and just plain gifts for no reason for DH's daughters

Like me, my family stopped doing this over the years because 1) DH's daughters could never be bothered to say thank you 2) more seriously DH's eldest refused to have anything to do with my family and threw tantrums and crying fits (in her late teens! :? ) when ever suggested she go to any of my family events and 3) most seriously she made up lies and created drama about my siblings to the point where some are afraid to even be alone in the same room with her for fear of the lies she might make up

Every time DH had started grumbling at all the 'time and effort' I put into buying my sister's skids gifts and why doesn't my family do this for his daughters I calmly remind him that his daughters don't see my family much, or I say that his eldest doesn't want anything to do with my family or I, really why would we she is now 32 and treating us this way etc...etc..

But this time, I let him have it - sorry but it was time and I think necessary since he did ask. Calmly and stateing only the facts of course but as soon as he asked the question I said "because my sister's skids say thank you"

Dh immediately gets defensive and says that his daughter's say thank you. I say "really?" well a few months ago when your eldest daughter was here and my sister was coming over too, when my sister learned your daughter was here with SGS she went and bought that adorable little gift full of goodies for SGS and did your daughter say thank you???? Sorry but no, she said nothing.

DH freaks and says he is going to phone SSIL and demand why they didn't say thank you. I'm thinking why phone SSIL???? Phone your daughter and ask HER. I did comment that at least SSIL did say to SGS 'did you say thank you' DH's daughter, no

In the past it used to embarrass me when DH's kids treated my family that way. I finally told them not to go to any trouble, the girls were entitled and didn't feel they needed to thank anyone for anything. Don't bother. YSD is not like this at all now that she is grown up, but at 32 DH eldest continues to act this way

It was nice my sister did it anyway, and so there goes DH's theory of how my family does nothing for his daughters like they do for her skids

I reminded DH that his eldest daughter doesn't thank me for anything including all the things for SGS which is why I don't like coming to her house with gifts for SGS

But the best is what his daughter just pulled two weeks ago at the birthday lunch for her and I. DH now buys all gifts for his family and I do the same for mine, but the gifts are always presented as being from us. So after DH's daughter opens all her birthday gifts she gets up and gives FIL a hug and says thank you, then gives DH's sister a hug and thanks her, then walks right on past me who was next, ignores me completely, then hugs DH and thanks him. She mumbled thanks as she passed me which I assumed was for me but who knows, she was behind me not in front and I guess that's better than previous years but it was once again her rude way of sticking it to me, of saying I won't give you the same thank you as my family because you're not

I calmly reminded DH of this and said sorry, but that would be why I nor my family have no inclination to do anything for his eldest daughter

Honestly, I think rather than DH demanding why no one does anything for his daughters he should instead just be embarrassed how his eldest acts and not say one word about what anyone else does for kids other than his :?