If you read my post two weeks ago, SD10's BM died. And I really need more advice.

I don't know what it's like to lose a parent...even a parent who was barely in this girl's life (mom was a drug addict who died alone in a cheap motel of a drug overdose)...but I'm certain the pain is tremendous...unbearable.

Still, where do you draw the line between "oh, be nice to SD10 because she is having a hard time and is grieving" and "I'm not her punching bag"?

SD10 is lashing at me in an unbearable manner. Telling me she hates me, slamming doors, yelling at me, etc. I think it's the anger stage of grief, because I'm here and her mom isn't. I am guessing that is probably normal for a kid in her shoes.

But how do I deal with it? I've tried gently reminding her that there are healthy ways to deal with pain, grief, and anger like talking it out; drawing; writing in a diary; etc. She continues to lash out at me and me only.

tonight she started wailing, kicking furniture, and screaming, "I wanna die! I'm gonna kill myself and be with my mom!" I know she's only 10 but those kind of threats scare me. Occasionally you DO see a news article about a young kid like her that really does commit suicide. DH says I'm overreacting, that she's just "looking for attention", and she might be but I'm taking this threat seriously. I told her she's going to see a counselor and until I am certain she is not a threat to herself, she cannot be out of my sight (except showering and bathroom) and her bedroom door must be open at all times.

I have already made an appointment for her with a counselor. She clearly needs help. I just need to know how to deal with this.