Earlier today while searching for answer I came across this website and I believe its the perfect place to talk and hopefully get some advice.

I am 27 years old father of two girls aged 7 years old and 6 months old. The past four years of my life has been very challenging in many way but mostly in my marriage. I am a former Marine and while I was in the service that is when my messy life began. I was married and after a year of been married I was on my first deployment, on which things between me and my wife got very bad specially with communication. I was deployed for 7 months to and we hardly talked mostly because of I was in "danger zone" therefore communication was restricted. My solution to that was getting my wife a Blackberry phone since I had access to email I figure that would help. After I got my her phone a few months later I had notice while paying the bill that there was a number that was not familiar, on the text message record that number was been used 24/7. after two months I called that number and they guys said he was a friend of my wife and that he was just keeping her company. I told him I found it disrespecful to be talking to a married woman non-stop. the fact of the matter is it didn't stop and after I was not able to do much because I was deployed and my resources were limited. After I came home form my deployment life was still the same just like an average marriage. 6 months later I had to travel to california for training for my next deployment, while I was there about tow weeks into my training I got a call very late at night from my wife, she was crying so i got concern. She told me she was cheating on me while I was deployed with that guy. She told me everything and then I found out that she had introduced that guy to my family while I was deployed. I was broken and hurt. After coming home from california there was a lot of arguments and things got really bad. A few I try to forget it and move on with my life I have always been a quiet reserve person. I don't know many people. over the course of the summer I decided I wanted a grill, so I took my happy self to Sears and bought a grill, that just happen to be the day I met a wonderful woman. There was just something about her I guess it was the way she sold me the grill that we just clicked. I gave her my email and we started to talk. Honestly I can say I never had a best friend until I met her, she was easy to talk to and great conversationalist. Daily we shared over 1000 emails I just felt comfortable talking to her and she did the same with me. She became my best friend. The relationship with my wife kept getting more and more dry to a point we married living in the same house but we were mostly roommates. For the past three years it has been hell we got separated twice and the female that I met as I said before we became more and more close together and she is in a abusive relationship and has three kids which I have met and she have met my girls too. After about two years on meeting she asked my leave my wife since she knew how things were and at some some my wife also became violent and she landed in jail on domestic assault charges. I had always wanted to keep my family together so I had faith on my marriage. A few month ago I finally got tired of trying and I filled for separation for the second time and this I am keeping my word on it. After filing fro divorce and after countess times my "friend" asked me to leave my wife so we can be together she is now "scared" to leave her husband because of how abusive he is. She now tells me to give her time to work things out and just to have faith.

Have anyone gone through anything like this and how have you handle it? Honestly I am out of ideas specially dealing with the kids, if I have "faith" and wait I will have 5 kids which I love kids but how do you blend two families together?