Is Disney dad making me the bitch to ss15 again?
My ss15 attends high school and the school is 0.9 mi from our house. The school cut bussing off if you live within a mile of the school. I do not drive SS to and from school unless it is really bad weather. (Heavy rain, storm etc.) We live in a rainy state so he has an umbrella for regular rainy days. He has a bike, a warm coat, and an umbrella. He is almost 16, healthy and strong and on the football team. I see no reason that either one of us should take the time or gas to transport him to school every day except in extreme weather. Well my DH just got home from working out of town all summer and is getting woken up every morning by ss asking for a ride. (He knows better than to ask me) and texts every day to come pick him up. My dh is doing it. My question is this. Is the fact that my dh is jumping up to drive him like he's a fragile 5 yr old making me out to be the hard-ass bitch while he gets to be the hero that saves the day again, or is this something I shouldn't get bent out of shape over?
Also want to note that when
Also want to note that when my bios were still in high school and living here, I didn't drive them either so nothing unfair about it.
If you're not doing it/being
If you're not doing it/being asked to by either SS or DH, it may not be a hill worth dying on. If he wants to drive his kid that is up to him.
If he is not asking you to drive him to/from school, but can sense your frustration about this, that is what is making you the b!tch to SS again. DH isn't making you the b!tch. You aren't making yourself the b!tch to SS. However, I think SS might think, "if I'm not asking SM to do this, what is she getting frustrated about?" If he knows better than to ask you, he surely knows you are frustrated about this.
I genuinely don't think this is worth getting frustrated over. If anything, I'm glad DH wants to do this- hopefully he's using these drives as an opportunity to find out about what's going on in SS' life, how school's going, etc.
I don't see why you'd appear
I don't see why you'd appear the b*tch. Who cares if Dad wants to get up and run kid to school? If he wants to take kid it's not big deal (unless it interferes with Dh working or prior commitments). That doesn't mean when Dad goes back to being not around that you should be expected to take SS if you don't want to.
I can say that no HS student in my district rides a bike to HS. Not one. The kid would look like a real 'point n laugh' to his peers if he attended school here and rode his bike to school. There is a handful of HS kids who walk, but most kids figure out real fast to ride with friends, neighbor's driving parent or are old enough to drive themselves. Fewer and fewer kids here are walking/riding bikes regardless of age. Part of that is the driving parents and driving HS kids drive like crazed demons in a big race to get somewhere and they'll either run the kids over or let the walker stand at the curbside waiting for car after car to zoom pass. In winter the cars can and do slide around because our village is cheap on salting roads and neighbors are racing off to work and not shoveling sidewalks.
If it's not that way for your SS it won't hurt him to walk when the weather is decent. But there's no 'rule' that says SMs must haul kids around, so you're cleared on the b*tch title. If Dad wants to drive kid and can, I's not give it another thought. DH driving kid a mile wouldn't be on my list of things to make a big deal over. I see SS must have survived the times he did walk, so it must not be of extreme necessity that you do drive him.
Yeah, I think your right. I
Yeah, I think your right. I just talked to dh about it and told him it just made it look like I was the bad guy and he reassured me that wasn't the case. That SS knows I am sick (MS) and it takes a lot for me to do that but that dh actually enjoys driving him. I'm fine with that. I think it's just the history with Sd18 constantly trying to divide us and so I transferred those feelings to something that wasn't a big deal.
Well the reason I thought it
Well the reason I thought it made me look like the bitch is because SS has been walking/biking back and forth to school since school started a month ago and dh has been home for 3 days and has driven him every day when I haven't driven him all month.
I remember growing up in
I remember growing up in Tuscon I had to ride my bike to school. I was in the 4th grade. It felt like I had to ride 10 miles each way. But I survived. I was only 8 or 9. I'm sure this teenager can manage.