It never goes away
Planned a great weekend beginning with taking my daughter to college. Dh and she actually get along well, and my other kids went for the day, along with dh. He was seemed off when we got home, and yesterday we had plans as we do every year to go to a big sports event. He seemed miserable, and Iasked........he shared that he was thinking of his own daughters........he has never seen their colleges.......only played the bills.. So he shared with me that this past week, he had gotten a photocopy of his daughter's college book bill receipt..nothing else.........it was mailed by her, a 21 year old.......he was deeply hurt by it. The man had just paid over 7 thousand a few weeks ago for her semester. No contact of course. This is all required by court. I told him not to send anything. Make her contact him.. This is just gross behavior.......again and again. It really ruined our day.
Why is he paying for her
Why is he paying for her college?! That poor man! He needs to not pay it. Let her learn how to make her own way in life since she doesn't see him. My kids will pay their college, sure I will help them but they can pay their own way through financial aid. There is no need to pay college as much these days since its far more expensive then it used to be. I am currently paying my own student loans. No one helped me and I didn't expect anyone to help me.
I get really tired of the younger generation sometimes because a lot of them think they are so entitled to stuff. Its become a generation entitlement.
That had to have been hard on him but it is nice that your kids are nice to him and get along. As far as his own, personally I don't think they deserve to have Daddy pay their way through college.
Most of what parents pay
Most of what parents pay towards college (when it's not an example of willingly wanting 'to help out') is because it's either part of state law and/or a part of the CO and divorce degree. It's been set in place for years to happen and little can be done to 'not just pay'. That's contempt of a CO.
But it seriously sucks this this brat woman send a photocopy for what she did and does not so much as have the decency to speak to her father. I feel sad for the OP's DH in this situation. Yeah, Daddy has to pay this and do that, but nothing requiring the child to communicate let alone be appreciative of all her father does for her. Yes, it's the ultimate sense of entitlement. This father's heart hurts because the entitled daughter (and legally so also not just self entitled) has cut him out of her life all except for what's in the CO. She sees her father as nothing more than a wallet. Sad.
I am really sorry for mis
I am really sorry for mis reading it. I had no idea that some states require that college be paid by parents. That is so sad especially for a woman who has nothing to do with her father. I feel sorry for the father. I live in a state where its not required.
It is court ordered. We live
It is court ordered. We live in a state where non custodial parents must pay for college, some percentage of it at least. The sad thing is that dh was more than willing to pay.
Like I said above, I am truly
Like I said above, I am truly sorry I misunderstood. That is really sad that she is treating him this way. Unreal. Either way, I think she is being extremely ungrateful. My personal opinion: I think all states should not make parents pay for college, that should be a parental decision. Especially with the cost of college and its so easy to get loans for students. Plus when they have to pay their own way and some help from parents (mainly what the parent can afford) then I think they do better. Its responsibility. But its not that way and that is so sad that he has to go through that.
I told him he needed to call
I told him he needed to call her up and basically discuss this gross behavior.. And surprisingly he just did! I do not know how it went, but he seems sad. His daughters have absolutely not a shred of empathy or respect for him. Of ourselves there is a sadistic ex wife who has groomed her daughters to follow in her footsteps..
I totally understand how you
I totally understand how you feel. Your last 2 sentences sum up my situation perfectly, except DH has 3 adult brats. We are not dealing with college, because the skids do not want to work or make any effort-college is not in their plan to be eternally lazy. When I offered to help one of them with an application, she said only "stupid people go to college because it costs money to go." I don't see DH's 3 ever changing; in fact, they are getting worse each day.
I can imagine how bad your DH felt when he opened that mail.
I am in your situation. I
I am in your situation. I have 40k in loans to become something and here I sit, no jobs in my area for me. Its crazy! I wish I would have stayed at the factory that I worked for before college. I was making awesome pay and by now I would have 16 years in and no college debt! Most likely would have made management by now and be like my husband. He is management and makes twice a year what I would have made with my degree! Its sad that he has to pay this for her. If it were me and my dad was paying I would be constantly saying thank you and showing him how much I love him on top of helping him pay for me to go to college!
It is sad that SD is so
It is sad that SD is so entitled she thinks such things as a college education is owed to her but it also that it is court mandated. Is there a certain limit as far as years or expense? My DH paid for SD to go through an expensive 4 year college. She never once showed the slightest amount of appreciation for it.
Have to say that even though SD is going to college she is not showing very much intelligence. She is burning her bridges with DH before she even gets to them.
WOW..... SPEACHLESS HERE!
WOW..... SPEACHLESS HERE!
Seriously?! Oh my God! I
Seriously?! Oh my God! I couldn't imagine going through that! Your right this world is messed up big time!
Raising my hand.......it was
Raising my hand.......it was me........and we got the court motion on our wedding day!!!!!
And the little coward never
And the little coward never called her father back. What a piece of work. Dh is thinking of sending her an email rehashing her gross behavior. We are collecting a paper trail for when he is likely dragged back into court in a year to pay the witch's graduate school. Show evidence that she just puts out her hand and pulls her nose up at dh.