Wedding this weekend
This weekend FDH and I are getting married. I see two possible end results.
1) SD7 behaves nicely...doesn't yell, hit, cry, act out, or poop her pants(which she did at BM's wedding last year).
MIL is civil, speaks to people, makes eye contact, and is pleasent.
BM is non exisitant.
It is a beautiful day.
OR
2) SD7 is out of control...running, crying, yelling, hurting other children, drawing attention to herself, and poops her pants(which once again, she did at BM's wedding).
MIL cries, speaks only in foreign languages, and only to those who speak them ie her family and DH.
BM shows up (delightful)
It could have been a beautiful day.
I am willing to do what it takes to get to option one. I have talked to FDH about BM. We truely believe she will be a non issue. I have talked to FDH about SD7. He has talked to her and I'm keeping my fingers crossed. I will ensure she spends lots of time on the potty before the service. MIL, IMHO is a wild card. I don't feel like I talk to FDH about it because what will I say? "Your mom can be kind of a hag...do you think you could ask her to be cool?"
Can you allocate another
Can you allocate another guest to be SD's minder? Or hire someone? I remember my son used to have an awful best friend who could not go into a restaurant without stabbing other customers with the cutlery, etc etc. But my son really, really adored him and apart from being totally wild he was a nice kid. We never invited him home but only to parties out of the home. Then, we always hired my teenage nephew to mind him at these birthday outings. It worked very well. My nephew worked very hard for his pay.
As for MIL, could you let some older relatives on your side into the secret about her awful personality and get them to do a relay babysit of her? One after another could accost her with a drink and engage her in conversation.
I feel for you, wedding should be YOUR day, get other guests who care about you to take on these 2 burdens.
Basically ^ This. For our
Basically ^ This.
For our wedding, I asked DH's SIL to be prepared to hustle SD out of the ceremony (that SD was part of :sick: :sick: :sick: ) if she started to be a monster.
MIL got put in her place (more or less) during pictures where she started bossing the photographers around and was trying to pitch a fit about who should be in what shot... (and no, she should not have had any say in because she contributed not a single penny and her wedding gift was a 1$ yard sale purchase.) DH flipped out on her and told her to behave like a normal person. She went straight for the guilt bone but he stood up to her and told her if she was going to cause problems, she could leave.
As for BM, tell your venue there's a remote possibility that your FDH's ex might show up and ask what the options are in that unlikely event. Or talk to your brothers/nephews/BILs/guy friends about it.
And, further to this
And, further to this brilliant idea of Aeron's, talk to the female guests too because if BM is the type to need people close up to her to get her out, you don't want guys being accused of assault. Gals will love to help though!! }:) }:) }:)
Have you considered asking
Have you considered asking Daddy that maybe the kid shouldn't be there? Especially since if she is you may not or may leave if things get hairy?
Great idea OCC. Tell MIL she
Great idea OCC. Tell MIL she is the only person that SD will tolerate to babysit her away from the wedding. }:)
That is actually a really
That is actually a really good idea! And BM knows all about the wedding because she's been asking SD7! And how or why did SD7 know?! FDH. It's a vicious cycle! MIL would like nothing better than to be called upon to watch SD7 during the service. Luckily it's at a park, so they can go as far away as they like!
We had a mad intrusive BM too
We had a mad intrusive BM too and I'm afraid we lied to the SKs at the time about the date, letting them believe our wedding was the day after it was scheduled. BM did not turn up in the end but the point was, we were relaxed on the day knowing that if she were to stage a scene, it would not be that day.
I do agree, OSD ruined my
I do agree, OSD ruined my wedding photos with her pouts and if I were to do it again, I'd exclude them.
I would love to think that
I would love to think that the "incident" was because of some stomach issue, or nervousness... but SD7 has a habit of doinG this when the center of attention is focused on someone or something other than herself. I don't feel like I can exclude her because everyone else in the family will be there, including my neices and nephews that are younger than her. And I really do want her to be there! So I'm going to personally call MIL and tell her SD7 has requested to play with grandma during the service! Great advice