We are in the same situation. My son goes to same school as SS and SD and BM refuses to let me pick them up or drop them off. And she will not allow them to ride in car with me either. We are going to court and asking for me to be added to the pick up and drop off list.

I wish I had advice... We havent been able to resolve this yet even with mediation and so now its on to court. She has an attorney and we dont so we will see.

I get tired of the BS and to be honest I am to the point where I say who cares........
Good luck

BM tried this with me, and I left and came back home sans skids. Oh the agony...lol. Seriously, though, if its in the court order, she's in contempt because you are acting as his agent. Call your attorney.

Read the blog I posted today!! Oh boy do we have drop off/pick up issues!!! Basically BM does not want to meet me, but she won't directly say it. I've washed my hands of trying to accommodate her and do favors for her. If DH can't get her on time, well then BM will just have to figure something else out from now on.

I have gone through the same thing. BM would refuse that I pick up the kids, spend time with them and be in any part of their lives especially with her daughter. We went to court 6 months ago because she was refusing to let my husband have split custody. She claimed that he traveled all the time, was never home, uninvolved with his children and that they should be spend time with her and not SM. Well guess what??? The bitch lost. The judge told her that Dad needed to focus on his job, that he was an involved father and a very good father. The judge also said Dad has remarried and moved on with his life. And that the SM will be in their lives for a very, very long time.

It's sad that you have to haul there ass's in for crap like this but you do. Take BM's behavior as her being jealous and insecure in herself.

I have also dealt with this. She told DH that her daughter isn't ready for "that exchange" but I guess she was ready to live with her ex con boyfriend in the same house? She's a nice piece of work. I decided to show her so basically she can control her picks her up but she can't control who drops her off so I made sure and did the drop off to her. I have never spoken to her and I treat SD like gold because I love her. Needless to say she looked madder than a hornet and then looked at SD and said "where's your daddy" I just drove off. I wish these women would grow up and accept reality. This chic cheated on him multiple times and left him so I don't know what her problem is.

I've dealt with this once before as I offered to drop off and pick up SS. BD was OK with me dropping SS off, but not picking SS up!?!?!?!? All's I was trying to do was be nice and helpful in the situation since there was conflict in schedules. Since then I do not go along with my fiancee to pick up or drop off SS. If there is ever a day where I am needed to drop off or pick up SS from/to BD, I will politely decline. It's a lot easier just removing myself from the situation and not having to deal with it. It's not worth the drama.

We had sort of the opposite issue. Dad would be working on the opposite side of town and I worked near where BM lived. BM didn't deny that I pick up SD, she would just "forget" that it was a visitation day, and I'd have to wait outside her house for 30 minutes until she got her ready. After 5 weeks of this happening, I just refused to pick her up anymore and basically said to her dad, she's YOUR daughter and it's YOUR ex wife. You figure it out. And I haven't worried about it since.

It is the same way here. BM is trying to say that my bf must parent his kids at no other place but his home, his gf can't watch them, certainly can't pick them up! LOL She says, "I don't know this woman," but she was the one who, when not allowing bf to have HIS time with his daughter on her birthday and required him to come to her birthday party if he wanted to see her, specifically said I could not come to her party. So she doesn't want to know me. She wants to control everything that happens with the kids, even when she doesn't have them. These bms are jealous, controlling, and just plain mean.

Is your stepdaughter ever in the car with you alone and you are driving..

If so...I would tell her to stick it...tell hubby to tell her to stick it..
No double standards here!

yes, because of this, BM is no longer allowed at my home. I will pick up the skids, but if that B* comes near me, look out. No joke. She attacked me when I was pregnant on my doorstep when she was picking up the skids years ago (after finding out I was home alone)....so yeah...there are some issues with drop off/pick up

Iwould call the lawyer and have them send her a nice little letter.. I had to have this done with my husbands ex she didnt want me at any medical appointments, school things and such... if the children are on his placement day she can not refuse you of picking them up if your husband said you can... i would pick them up if i were you all the time just to piss her off like she is making your life a rollercoaster...

I got all of you beat! Here is my story. My stepson's mom works a full-time job. My step-son who is almost 11 years old is still riding the school bus to a daycare that he hates so much that he fakes being sick so he doesn't have to go. I don't work and stay home with our other three children. my husband offered his bio mom for him to ride the bus to our house to avoid him having to be humiliated by going to a daycare at his age to play with little kids and babies until his bio mom gets off work. Biomom didn't respond to any of the offers. She allows me to pick the child up from our pickup location but refuses to give my husband and I the code to get into the daycare so we have to sit at the door and ring a doorbell so they allow my 11 year old step son to leave with my husband during our visitation. She will not let me pick him up at the daycare at all but allows me to pick him up elsewhere. To top it all off, we were ordered to pay the $50.00 weekly fee in our child support agreement for him to go to the daycare in the first place. Whatever happened to putting the childs best interest first?

She has a case of bad attitude! Your best bet is to have DH pick her up & let him deal with her. The rights shes feels solely come from the birth parents. I'm sorry to hear you got stuck with her attitude.

Keep in mind that if she was your child, would you allow her to treat anyone that way?

While each state is different - you are allowed to PU the children according to the DD. Go to PU, if she refuses to give you the children then call the cops. They can not force her to give them to you,but they can write up a report. Tell them you will be requesting a legal copy that can be used in court. ALso be sure to get the report number before either of you leave the site. If you have to drive a distance to get them and you go home empty handed 2 other things you may do, but a package of gum or a soda proving you were there (you need to keep your receipt), and ask for the CP to pay for your gas for the wasted trips. After you have 6 or so of the reports file for contempt. When you do that be sure to have the reports, you may also want to get the names of the police officers and have the supeoned to appear. This is a back up in case the opposing attorney tries to say the papers can not be submitted. Some do this because "you can not cross examine a piece of paper". Having the cops there will be your ace in the hole.

Also, when you are aking for relief be sure to ask for make up time with the kids. If you lose 15 minutes or the entire weekend, keep track of the amount and ask to have the time made up. Asking for attorneys fees is also a good one in these types of cases.