"I Just Ignore It" Yes, that's how we solve everything, by ignoring it. *vent*
So, FDH and I had a heart to heart yesterday, and I can't help it, something he said just runned me the wrong way. I was discussing how it seems he was more interested in a babysitter than a wife, that all I have been doing is taking care of kids. Anyway, long story short, we got a lot talked out, but, I told him how tired I am of being the only one who corrects the kids in the store. andhe laughs and says "Well, I just ignore them when they are being bad in the stores, it works for me" I don't know why but that just made me want to through things. Because ignoring the children when they are behaving badly/unsafely is the perfect solution. I am pretty strict about how my son behaves in public, I expect him to walk, use his inside voice, keep his hands to himself and stay with me at all times. My son isn't perfect and he doesn't behave perfectly, but there are consequences for his misbehavior. How can you ignore your child running around a store like a wild monster? It makes me want to jump out of my skin.
What am I going to do? It is quite simple. When we go out in public he can deal with his son by himself. I take my son, I deal with my son, and when his acts like a heathen, I leave. I keep my own buggy and I just walk away. It is so much less stressful than trying to deal with SS who throughs a screaming fit when his is disciplined. So when he turns around and SS has disappeared and is climbing shelves and hiding from his dad, and I am no where to be found because I have walked away and am listening to FDH call frantically for SS, I hope he is happy with his ignore policy. Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
if he won't listen to you or
if he won't listen to you or work with you then ignoring and leaving the situation is all you can do. leave it to him to parent (or not parent in this case) his own child.
OMG I rmember it well. The
OMG I rmember it well. The picking things up from store shelves, the shouting back to performers at shows, the running in 3 different directions... then being told off by members of the public as if I was their mother... well done for abandoning the pair of them! Sad dad
Ugh - this is why I don't
Ugh - this is why I don't join in or open my mouth about fun kid events! The kids misbehave and it's okay to the parent(s). I'm sorry; I have learned to just stay away and not participate. I know it kinda hurts Fdh's feelings, but I don't like feeling embarassed in public by 2 kids that are not mine.
(((hugs)))
On behalf of shoppers
On behalf of shoppers everywhere, a big full face slap to your DH! How horribly inconsiderate!
I am soooo with you on the
I am soooo with you on the frustration of this. In the last few weeks we have had 2 instances where I didn't think FSS10 was acting properly in public. Once, at a school concert (that HE requested to attend) he was wiggling and squirming and tried to lay down at one point. I gave my FDH the "Ugh..Helloooooo" look, and he made him sit up...sorta. I was embarassed and frustrated because there were kids way younger than him sitting properly and behaving well. I mentioned it later, and FDH made excuses like "well, where we sat was so uncomfortable" and "it was even hurting my back to sit there." Days later, at the grocery store, and FSS10 was touching items, leaning back on the case...just sorta acting all goofy. I leave almost ALL of the "getting on to" the kids to my FDH...but it is SOOO hard not to say something sometimes. The interesting thing is that FSS10 NEVER acts that way when he and I go to the store without FDH. FDH kinda blows it off, gives excuses about age, etc, and in truth, is just not that good at the whole "discipline" thing. I try not to let it get to me....mention it politely to FDH when I know that It's festering and just try to appreciate that it could be WAAAAY worse.
I Love the way you just ignored and walked off...I agree that it's his problem and he can deal with it. You also might give him some ideas to help. I always give FSS10 the list, and a pen, and jobs to help me when we go to the store together without FDH and he is really pretty wonderful and helpful (especially now that he knows where to look for the price per oz...etc). Sad that it's not the kids fault....they do what's been expected. Hope it gets better, or that you can continue to AVOID without too much stress.
HA HA HA I LOVE that you just
HA HA HA I LOVE that you just walk away good on you!! you're right why should you be embaressed by thier childs behavoir! My SD2 is awful that I dont go out with her, the last time we all went out together SD5 was constantly telling me 'but mummy does this' whilst DH was on his phone and SD2 was throwing a fit because I wouldn't let her stand up on the bus! until the bus suddenly stopped and she banged her head, not majorly but enough to hurt and I was like 'told you why' ensure more screaming and people lookingat me like i can't restrain my own child- the shame of it all!! Then they both wanted to come into MY bed- wtf! get out!! lol