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What can I do?? what do I say if anything?

BLUEEYES's picture

Submitted by BLUEEYES on Mon, 04/09/2012 - 12:57pm

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I am really confused on how to handle this and what to say even if I should say anything..

my sd13 is always jumping in when her mom talks bad about me and then my sd10 tells me and also yells at the sd13 for doing it...

someother things too she does things behind my back like if i tel;l her no to something she goes and asks her dad behind my back. She feels that she does not have to listen to the rules set at our house if she doesnt want to. she also has been lying about biys being at friends house and going over to these friends houses meeting boys .. if i ever leture her on gher behavior it feels like i am the bad guy and she has in one ear and out the tother no respose from her good or bad and them i aske her does she understand and she says i dont know... what the hell does that mean??? i am truly sick of her behavior and games she plays with all of parents and i want it to end it is almost like i really dont want to be around her at all anymore and i feel bad for thinking that way but it is true i hate even talking ot her cause i know everything she says is a big lie... what can I do??

knucklehead's picture

Submitted by knucklehead on Mon, 04/09/2012 - 1:02pm

Honestly, you should let the bioparent handle the parenting. I know it's tough, but it's really up to him to set and enforce the rules. ESPECIALLY with teens.
How long have you been around?

BTW, in one ear and out the other is trait of teens. Smile

BLUEEYES's picture

Submitted by BLUEEYES on Mon, 04/09/2012 - 1:05pm

I have been in her life since she was in 2nd grade and we all agreed to all of parents me, dad, and mom discipline and they can be open to come to any of us with issues and problems... just to answer your question..thanks!!

knucklehead's picture

Submitted by knucklehead on Mon, 04/09/2012 - 1:08pm

That makes sense.
Just remember, teens are notoriously difficult for a reason. It will get worse. But then it gets better. Smile Honest.

stepalong's picture

Submitted by stepalong on Mon, 04/09/2012 - 2:00pm

Let the parent handle the discipline about boys etc etc but i would definitely confront her about lying about you. Not dispense the discipline, but in a calm manner, let her know she lies about you and that is never OK and you expect that she tells the truth about you. I also add in "I expect you to never lie about anyone" so your'e not singling youself out as special or whatever. You must have confidence from your husband however that he will discipline her for lying--I could say to my sd "I know you lied about me and we expect truth telling 100% of the time and your dad will deliver the consequence." and that's that and she gets a spanking...the lying has just about completely stopped but that's bc her dad backs me up 100% of the time.